Is this really cheating?

[LiL PaKi]

last time cheating was when I guy was macking with my girl. I laughed, when up to get the guy and shoved me fist up in his face. Lets just say after that he look like a mummy. AHAHAHAHAHAH so I guess numbers are okay just for me cheating is when a girl or guys is seeing someone else kissing or fondling each other.

what if your girl was flirting with a guy and then got his number? you wouldn't call that cheating until they actually did something?

[Jaimecbr900]

what if your girl was flirting with a guy and then got his number? you wouldn't call that cheating until they actually did something?

How would you know they were "flirting"?

[LiL PaKi]

How would you know they were "flirting"?

how would u know if they weren't making out before the number was givin? it was just an assumption

[Jaimecbr900]

how would u know if they weren't making out before the number was givin? it was just an assumption

That's exactly my point, it's your assumption that some flirting took place and that's the reason for the number exchange. What if it has a less sinister reason? Why not just merely ask him and based on their reaction act accordingly? It seems that people try and make up their mind before they even ask. That is only going to make you bias to their answer, not necessarily the truth.

[LiL PaKi]

That's exactly my point, it's your assumption that some flirting took place and that's the reason for the number exchange. What if it has a less sinister reason? Why not just merely ask him and based on their reaction act accordingly? It seems that people try and make up their mind before they even ask. That is only going to make you bias to their answer, not necessarily the truth.

agree
Can't help it... it's like you want to trust someone then you can't..

[silver]

Can't help it... it's like you want to trust someone then you can't..

This is where I have learned alot from. And this is just me.. but its like if you can't trust someone or decide to trust them you are only going to convince yourself that there is something not to trust.. if that makes sense..

Its hard to say either trust someone or dont, cause people get screwed over and make it hard for people to move on and trust others... but then again why penalize someone for something someone else did in the past to make you have trust issues. Everyone is going to get burned, but you have to remember that you are picking the people that you give your trust to from the get go.

The guy I am dating now.. its been about 6 mths now. He has never given me any doubt in my mind a reason to not trust him. He has even gotten the phone calls from girls he dated years ago.. and its come a long way for me to do this but I trust him 110% or I would not even be wasting my time in the raltionship.. But that is a chance that I have taken to see if someone values my trust. Yeah it sucks to be burned but when you find a person that you can trust and also can trust you it makes it worth it and is just that much better.

[Tasuki_Civic]

This is where I have learned alot from. And this is just me.. but its like if you can't trust someone or decide to trust them you are only going to convince yourself that there is something not to trust.. if that makes sense..

Its hard to say either trust someone or dont, cause people get screwed over and make it hard for people to move on and trust others... but then again why penalize someone for something someone else did in the past to make you have trust issues. Everyone is going to get burned, but you have to remember that you are picking the people that you give your trust to from the get go.

The guy I am dating now.. its been about 6 mths now. He has never given me any doubt in my mind a reason to not trust him. He has even gotten the phone calls from girls he dated years ago.. and its come a long way for me to do this but I trust him 110% or I would not even be wasting my time in the raltionship.. But that is a chance that I have taken to see if someone values my trust. Yeah it sucks to be burned but when you find a person that you can trust and also can trust you it makes it worth it and is just that much better.

dont blind yourself....alot of women do that

there is one thing of not trusting someone and there is a nother when you see what is going to happen before it actually goes down. like you see the outcome before it happens.

its happen to me b4 and i deaded the relationship cause i knew what was gonna happen over time. and it did. some pple choose to wait it out and others dont.

as far as the number thing i dont know what i would do. i assume i would ask. but its almost whats the point. if they cheat they cheat. id have to sit back and watch first before i ask. i dont want to say something and look like worry wort and im wrong. but then again it depends how things were between us

[Tasuki_Civic]

That's exactly my point, it's your assumption that some flirting took place and that's the reason for the number exchange. What if it has a less sinister reason? Why not just merely ask him and based on their reaction act accordingly? It seems that people try and make up their mind before they even ask. That is only going to make you bias to their answer, not necessarily the truth.

you tellin me that the idea of "who tha fuck is this dude" number is and it wouldnt cross your mind that dude would want more than what he says. there are men out here like that. no matter status.

[Jaimecbr900]

you tellin me that the idea of "who tha fuck is this dude" number is and it wouldnt cross your mind that dude would want more than what he says. there are men out here like that. no matter status.

See, you're doing exactly what I was trying to show Lil Paki is not good either. You are totally convinced that something bad is happening BEFORE you even ask what's up. That in turn will likely automatically make you think in only one direction regardless. That is counter productive. He MAY very well be screwing around or he may just be flirting and forgot to throw away the number or he may have gotten the number for that girl to sew you a special valentine's day pillow. The point is that you DON'T KNOW for sure until you ask.

A lot of women are awful about making their worst fears into prophecies. Sometimes this could be avoided by merely giving someone the benefit of the doubt until they don't deserve it. If the guy HAS cheated before and is on thin ice, then shoot yeah you're gonna think the worst right out of the gate. But if he's been a decent guy up until that point, which after only 6 mos is highly likely, then why not give him the benefit of the doubt until he DOES screw up. If you can't look at someone you're sleeping with in the eyes and tell when he/she is lying to you, then you probably shouldn't tie up your feelings with that person. That's what booty calls and friends with benefits are for. If it's someone you "love", then by the time you tell them you "love" them you should be able to read them enough to tell if they're lying to you. Besides, the story is either plausible or not. If it's not, then break it off in him. If it is, don't act like a psycho and go postal because you may just be over reacting.

By the way, no offense but this is one of the reasons both guys and girls get the bad rep of being "psycho" is because they are always thinking of the worst before they think of the best in common scenarios. If I was in the dating scene and I was liking a certain someone for a few months when she suddenly without asking freaks out about a phone number on MY dresser, I'd kick her to the curb on the spot. This is exactly why a lot of relationships which otherwise may work out end up NOT working out. People come with pre-dispositions that "I'm gonna get hurt", "he's GONNA cheat on me because the last one did", "hes gotta be cheating because he smells good", or whatever other pre-conceived idea they come in with.

There is nothing wrong with merely asking what's up, and then based on their answer you react.

[Tasuki_Civic]

See, you're doing exactly what I was trying to show Lil Paki is not good either. You are totally convinced that something bad is happening BEFORE you even ask what's up. That in turn will likely automatically make you think in only one direction regardless. That is counter productive. He MAY very well be screwing around or he may just be flirting and forgot to throw away the number or he may have gotten the number for that girl to sew you a special valentine's day pillow. The point is that you DON'T KNOW for sure until you ask.

A lot of women are awful about making their worst fears into prophecies. Sometimes this could be avoided by merely giving someone the benefit of the doubt until they don't deserve it. If the guy HAS cheated before and is on thin ice, then shoot yeah you're gonna think the worst right out of the gate. But if he's been a decent guy up until that point, which after only 6 mos is highly likely, then why not give him the benefit of the doubt until he DOES screw up. If you can't look at someone you're sleeping with in the eyes and tell when he/she is lying to you, then you probably shouldn't tie up your feelings with that person. That's what booty calls and friends with benefits are for. If it's someone you "love", then by the time you tell them you "love" them you should be able to read them enough to tell if they're lying to you. Besides, the story is either plausible or not. If it's not, then break it off in him. If it is, don't act like a psycho and go postal because you may just be over reacting.

By the way, no offense but this is one of the reasons both guys and girls get the bad rep of being "psycho" is because they are always thinking of the worst before they think of the best in common scenarios. If I was in the dating scene and I was liking a certain someone for a few months when she suddenly without asking freaks out about a phone number on MY dresser, I'd kick her to the curb on the spot. This is exactly why a lot of relationships which otherwise may work out end up NOT working out. People come with pre-dispositions that "I'm gonna get hurt", "he's GONNA cheat on me because the last one did", "hes gotta be cheating because he smells good", or whatever other pre-conceived idea they come in with.

There is nothing wrong with merely asking what's up, and then based on their answer you react.

wow? in many words....like i said i would ask. im not gonna assume the worst but i wouldnt let it blind me either. i wouldnt expect for the guy to cheat and i would be surprised if it happened.

what you quoted is what i was asking how you would act. would you keep it in mind that you saw this number and then you saw it again? how would you feel? like something is going on?

wouldnt you question because it made you think twice like who is this dude? and you would want to know if he was a threat to you or not? on the first time that you saw the number? if you dont think that then you that means you dont give a shit about who she meets and where. you would think if your married you would care about who is in your loved ones life......am i wrong......if i am its ok. im learning from what you think.

[Tasuki_Civic]

See, you're doing exactly what I was trying to show Lil Paki is not good either. You are totally convinced that something bad is happening BEFORE you even ask what's up. That in turn will likely automatically make you think in only one direction regardless. That is counter productive. He MAY very well be screwing around or he may just be flirting and forgot to throw away the number or he may have gotten the number for that girl to sew you a special valentine's day pillow. The point is that you DON'T KNOW for sure until you ask.

A lot of women are awful about making their worst fears into prophecies. Sometimes this could be avoided by merely giving someone the benefit of the doubt until they don't deserve it. If the guy HAS cheated before and is on thin ice, then shoot yeah you're gonna think the worst right out of the gate. But if he's been a decent guy up until that point, which after only 6 mos is highly likely, then why not give him the benefit of the doubt until he DOES screw up. If you can't look at someone you're sleeping with in the eyes and tell when he/she is lying to you, then you probably shouldn't tie up your feelings with that person. That's what booty calls and friends with benefits are for. If it's someone you "love", then by the time you tell them you "love" them you should be able to read them enough to tell if they're lying to you. Besides, the story is either plausible or not. If it's not, then break it off in him. If it is, don't act like a psycho and go postal because you may just be over reacting.

By the way, no offense but this is one of the reasons both guys and girls get the bad rep of being "psycho" is because they are always thinking of the worst before they think of the best in common scenarios. If I was in the dating scene and I was liking a certain someone for a few months when she suddenly without asking freaks out about a phone number on MY dresser, I'd kick her to the curb on the spot. This is exactly why a lot of relationships which otherwise may work out end up NOT working out. People come with pre-dispositions that "I'm gonna get hurt", "he's GONNA cheat on me because the last one did", "hes gotta be cheating because he smells good", or whatever other pre-conceived idea they come in with.

There is nothing wrong with merely asking what's up, and then based on their answer you react.

that is soooo cheesie i would beat his ass for doin some corny ass shit like that. THEN i would think he was cheating LOL no lie.