What's the craziest thing you've ever said to a cop?

[HvyArms]

You need to go to the Police Department and request a copy of the dashboard video

[Seymour222]

"I am wearing workboots, black boxers, and an Nsync t-shirt."

[HvyArms]

I've talked crap to a few cops in my day, but I've never said anything about a cops wife and got a laugh. When I was 15, in LA, this cop asked me why I was dressed in "gang attire".

Then he went on to say:
"You think you look tough, huh? You think it makes you a big man dont you? These lil hoodrats like you dressed like this?"

Me:
"Nah, but ya mom likes that shit"

He punched me in the stomach, and then in the head. But I knew that was coming anyway, so I figured I might as well talk shit. Being respectable wasnt gonna change the outcome.

[blacknightteg]

i dont know if what i said to a cop was crazy, but it was kinda funny and made the cop look a little stupid.

i was out at a light in swannee sitting at the stop light. the cop was right behind me waiting to go like i was, well the light turned green and then all of a sudden he turned his lights on, i pull over, he does the same. He comes up to my window asks me for my license n registration, you know the usual. then he goes " do you know why i pulled you over?" Me, still being like like "WTF, cuz i was stopped at a stop light?" in the back of my mind i said "no". Well he proceeds to tell me that the reason that he pulled me over was because i wasnt wearing a seat belt.

((quick back ground, this was in my old car which was an 85 chevy caprice classic 2dr, we had just recently gotten the seat belt replaced right before that because it had been messed up for a while. when we got the seat belt replaced, the guy that replaced it at the shop only put a lap belt in, he researched if he was able to do that and it said that by law it was legal just to have a lap belt))

anyways back to the story. well after he said that. no joke, i looked down at the lap belt that was strapped in tight, and then back up at him and said yes i am sir. I guess he got the idea, didnt really say anything for a second. i guess he was trying to come up with an excuse to make him self feel better. so his response was, "well in this year of a car you need to have a shoulder strapp as well." Well, me being the dumbass that i am i said, "well sir, no offense, but the person whome installed this for us at a shop had researched laws and what have you to make sure it was a legeal thing to do and it was so he installed it this way." i dont think he was expecting the whole " research thing to happen. Well, he couldnt really think of anything else to say, and just repeated himself again and i did the same lol. anyways, the final part of the convo was him just telling me to get it fixed and walked away with no ticket. I went home, told my parents what happend, they thought that was the dumbest thing they had ever heard.

[{X}Echo419]

day before i turned 21 went to a party in athens. long about 1145 we deside to hit the waffles house. we got stopped at a road block (we had a sober driver) and the cops piled everyone out to check ids. i was last and heres how it went down...
cop: lemme see your id
i hand him my id
cop: you been drinkin tonite mr. w
me: you bet your ass!
everyone leaned on the car snickers, the guys back up coughs.
cop: where you guys headed
me: we're gonna get some fuckin waffles
the peanut gallery reacts and by this time the other cops on the road block have started to take notice and come over.
cop looks at me, looks at his watch, looks at my id, looks at his watch then back to me...
cop: mr. w you've been 21 for all of 10min, your one luck son of a bitch
me: ya baby!
cop: your not gonna try and drive home tonite are you?
me: naw man, after i hit these waffles they gonna drop me off at you house and ima tap your wife!
3 of our guys fell over laughin, the drunk waitin in the back of one the squad cars laughed so hard he threw up (which made everyone, even the cop hastlin me, laugh even harder), 2 of the other cops got in their car and started slappin the dashboard and i could hear the dispatcher laughin over the radio.
cop looks at the driver and says: take him home or im comin after you. happy bday mr. w now get the fuck outta here before you end up in jail.

bullshit!

[blacknightteg]

thats gotta be a fucking crock a shit story. either that or the cop got laid the night before after a dry spell and was happy

[HEATON]

Well one really late night on base I supposely didn't come to a complete stop (stopped for 2 secs, sorry if it wasnt for the full 3) and then also went into a wrong way entrance ( the do not enter sign wa snot reflective and was also posted on the back of a bigger stop sign, so the shape nor words coudl be made out) but Anyways..

Security Forces (AF Cops) pulled me over, and told me what I had done wrong and did the usual ID check, etc.. Then after he explained what was going on, he asks me "If You were me, would you give yourself a ticket" I guess I said the wrong thing which was "I dont really care, Im kinda in a hurry, just do w/e you gotta do"
Luckily enough... "tickets" on base don't have to be paid for, they are more or less just notices to your senior leaders!

[HvyArms]

Well one really late night on base I supposely didn't come to a complete stop (stopped for 2 secs, sorry if it wasnt for the full 3) and then also went into a wrong way entrance ( the do not enter sign wa snot reflective and was also posted on the back of a bigger stop sign, so the shape nor words coudl be made out) but Anyways..

Security Forces (AF Cops) pulled me over, and told me what I had done wrong and did the usual ID check, etc.. Then after he explained what was going on, he asks me "If You were me, would you give yourself a ticket" I guess I said the wrong thing which was "I dont really care, Im kinda in a hurry, just do w/e you gotta do"
Luckily enough... "tickets" on base don't have to be paid for, they are more or less just notices to your senior leaders!

Shoulda said: If I were you, I'd be somewhere talking to a woman right now instead of another man. But thats just ME.

[Doppelgänger]

me and some friends were out chillin after doing a few runs and the cops showed up. One of the cops looks at my tag and asks "So...ummmm what is your tag supposed to mean?". Another cop pipes up and says "It's supposed to make it hard for us to read." Then they turned to me and i looked back at them and said "Its not you can't see the rest of the fucking car". Then they asked if i had any "NOS" in the car..... i looked at the cops and said "i dont need any pussy juice in my car, bottle are for babys....real men get blown"..... the look on the cops face was priceless. HachiDori was there as was a few other people who post on here.


I got pulled over one night on my way to Athens for doing 80 in a 65. Cop was mostly friendly and i was cool until he said he was going to impound my car (suspended registration, but i had a letter saying it didnt have to be impunded). Well i get out of my car and look back and see 4 police cars behind me. I look at the cop and say "Damn, all this for a minor speeding ticket, a cooperative person and a suspended registration..... i thought you guys were trying to do something worth my tax dollars and catch people who might be a little more dangerous then me... good going". Needless to say, i promptly shut up after that.

[HvyArms]

So...when I make threads like these, I just naively assume that people will be HONEST. It never crosses my mind, that anyone would lie to make a story more colorful, or just make something up all together.

I also assume, that if I can read someones post and think 'ahh thats bullshit', so can anyone else. So why post bullshit? We know you're lying.

[Doppelgänger]

you callin bs on me??? i got witnesses from my first incident!!

[HvyArms]

Actually, I'm not calling BS on anyone in particular. Those who are BSin know it. I guess it's not really a big deal, all the posts are pretty amusing. I just wonder where you have to live, or in which tax bracket you have to earn, or of which complexion of white you have to be, in order NOT to get your ass kicked by a cop when you're talking shit AND in the wrong.

I talk hella shit to cops, but only when I'm not in violation of any law. I know I wasnt speeding, or my liscense is legit, my car's registered etc. I'm talking shit if the officer is getting smart with me.

But I guess, we all have different experiences huh?

[jmmx258]

you callin bs on me??? i got witnesses from my first incident!!

Think he means the one sleeping with the cops wife lol

[ARH1192]

me and some friends were out chillin after doing a few runs and the cops showed up. One of the cops looks at my tag and asks "So...ummmm what is your tag supposed to mean?". Another cop pipes up and says "It's supposed to make it hard for us to read." Then they turned to me and i looked back at them and said "Its not you can't see the rest of the fucking car". Then they asked if i had any "NOS" in the car..... i looked at the cops and said "i dont need any pussy juice in my car, bottle are for babys....real men get blown"..... the look on the cops face was priceless. HachiDori was there as was a few other people who post on here.


I got pulled over one night on my way to Athens for doing 80 in a 65. Cop was mostly friendly and i was cool until he said he was going to impound my car (suspended registration, but i had a letter saying it didnt have to be impunded). Well i get out of my car and look back and see 4 police cars behind me. I look at the cop and say "Damn, all this for a minor speeding ticket, a cooperative person and a suspended registration..... i thought you guys were trying to do something worth my tax dollars and catch people who might be a little more dangerous then me... good going". Needless to say, i promptly shut up after that.

why wouldnt u just tell them ur a drifter and if u really wanted to u could use ur mad drifting to get away and they wouldnt even see the tag bc of the smoke bc ur that hardcore.. droptopdrifting FTW

hah

[jmmx258]

Actually, I'm not calling BS on anyone in particular. Those who are BSin know it. I guess it's not really a big deal, all the posts are pretty amusing. I just wonder where you have to live, or in which tax bracket you have to earn, or of which complexion of white you have to be, in order NOT to get your ass kicked by a cop when you're talking shit AND in the wrong.

I talk hella shit to cops, but only when I'm not in violation of any law. I know I wasnt speeding, or my liscense is legit, my car's registered etc. I'm talking shit if the officer is getting smart with me.

But I guess, we all have different experiences huh?

I just wait til its all said and done with haha. Then he cant do shit period. Esp. after my car was off the tow truck, locked in the driveway, and the towing fee was already paid

[Doppelgänger]

why wouldnt u just tell them ur a drifter and if u really wanted to u could use ur mad drifting to get away and they wouldnt even see the tag bc of the smoke bc ur that hardcore.. droptopdrifting FTW

hah

i did ask a cop one "if you were chasing someone and they took one of those cloverleaf style exit ramps and drifted the whole thing... would let him go?" He said hello no.

[HvyArms]

I was at a gas station once, with a classmate. We walked in to get some stuff, walk out and there's a bike cop sitting there behind my car. So the girl I was with says "Hi" with a smile. He didnt even speak to her. We pull outta the lot, and about 2 blocks later here his faggot ass comes flashing lights and all that dumb shit.

40 minutes, 6 squad cars, and 8 officers later, we get to leave. Then, it turns out, that this idiot didn't even write to correct make of my car on the ticket.

[jmmx258]

i did ask a cop one "if you were chasing someone and they took one of those cloverleaf style exit ramps and drifted the whole thing... would let him go?" He said hello no.

He was just a poor sport! haha

[HvyArms]

i did ask a cop one "if you were chasing someone and they took one of those cloverleaf style exit ramps and drifted the whole thing... would let him go?" He said hello no.

He said "hello no" huh?

You shoulda said: Sir, you're clearly a retard. So, you should just let me off on principle.


I got stopped by a GSU cop once. I asked him what he would've done if I didn't stop. He said "I would've chased you all over the city". I said "psssh in a Crown Vic?? I kinda doubt that."

I ended up driving off on him, I didnt run though, I just drove off. He asked for my license knowing that he wasn't gonna write me a ticket. He only stopped me, to show off in front of the women. I figured I'd do him a favor, by just leaving, and letting him get back to the chicks. I was a little paranoid for like 20 minutes, but I didnt have any trouble.

[gokblok]

Got pulled over in Arcade late one night while in the right lane with the cruise set to 55. Cops race up behind me doing at least 80, follow me for a mile, and light me up. They ask if I know why I've been pulled over.

"I don't have a clue."

"Your right front tire hit the white line on the side of the road."

"Is that illegal?"

"We just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine, thanks. Don't you have some crime to be stopping? Shouldn't you be somewhere protecting and serving, instead of harrassing me searching for a reason to give me a ticket?"

"Don't be a smartass."

"I'm not. Can I have my license?"

"Have a good night."

"Have fun pulling over more innocent people."

Fuck arcade.

[HvyArms]

so...the guy in your avatar is...riding dick? mmm why?

[jmmx258]

so...the guy in your avatar is...riding dick? mmm why?

Now i dont mean to talk shit..but read his signature lol. I'm noticing a pattern haha :p

[ARH1192]

i did ask a cop one "if you were chasing someone and they took one of those cloverleaf style exit ramps and drifted the whole thing... would let him go?" He said hello no.

you must not have sensed the sarcasm

[HvyArms]

Now i dont mean to talk shit..but read his signature lol. I'm noticing a pattern haha :p

lol oh yeah, I noticed alright

[Crazy Asian]

I was eating skittles and I said do you want some. AHAHHAHA and he said no..I was like these are deliciously made. LOL He just said aite you can go but dont choke on those skittles.

[HEATON]

I remember back in Highschool, supposely one of the drug dogs, thought there was something in my car (newly purchased used car). I get called outside and then I notice paw prints, scratches, and slobber marks on my rear fender.. Without thinking I started approaching the dog handler who was standing next to the Sheriff, and bitched him out for his dog scratchin my car. Not the smartest thing since the dog could have easily ripped my arm off. For some odd reason I didnt curse once at either cop, even though that may have the most pissed Ive been to that point in time. Right when I got finnished my headmaster walks up to hear the dog handler say "That wasn't my fucking dog" It was complete silence right after that, and the school agreed to pay for the paint/bodywork to cover the scratches.

[HvyArms]

Once, I was cuffed in a patrol car with my friend. He and I in the backseat, 1 officer in the front, writing some BS. We were sitting there for a while, waiting on some detective and an arson investigator...long story.

So anyway, my friend starts whinning to me.

Him: Are we going to jail?

Me: ...Wha?

Him: Are we going to jail now? I can't go to jail man.

Me: I swear to God man...

Him: My dad is gonna kill me, I've never been to jail. I cant go to jail.

Me: Man if you dont shut the f*ck, I'm bea..

Officer: Both of you shut up.

Him: Sir, do you know Sherrif Jaime Hudson? That's my sister okay, could you call her?

Officer: No, I dont know her. Why do you want her? We're waiting for Arson, that's it.

Him: Sir, I really cant go to jail

Me: Are you begging the cop? Oh my god, I'm gonna fuck you up.

Him: Sir, please call her. She's a Sherrif in Dekalb county.

Officer: Why are you telling me this?

Me: Would you please take these handcuffs off of me? Please?

Him: Because I need her help sir. Man, my dad is gonna murder me. I cant go to jail.

Me: Man you better HOPE that they dont let us go, cuz if they do I'm kic...ARE YOU CRYING?

Him: I've never been to jail man, I cant do this.

Me: Ahhh damn. I'm gonna kick ya ass, I promise.

Officer: Shut the fuck up. By the way, unless your sister is going to come and suck my cock, you're not getting out of this.

LOL, it was a fucked up thing to say, but my boy's tears dried up like magic when the officer said that. I thought it was dirty, but hilarious.

[Crazy Asian]

WTF WHT THE HELL DID YOU DO!!!???

[jmmx258]

Officer: Shut the fuck up. By the way, unless your sister is going to come and suck my cock, you're not getting out of this.

LOL, it was a fucked up thing to say, but my boy's tears dried up like magic when the officer said that. I thought it was dirty, but hilarious.

I'd have turned his ass in!! There's gotta be someway to get him dicked over for that lol

[HvyArms]

I'd have turned his ass in!! There's gotta be someway to get him dicked over for that lol

Man they were cussing us out the whole day, at the scene, in the interrogation room, in booking. It didnt even matter anymore.

[Crazy Asian]

WHAT DID YOU DO!!! Did you light some granny on fire or something?

[HvyArms]

WTF WHT THE HELL DID YOU DO!!!???

Well, HE accidentally burned up the front end of a BMW. I mean from the windshield forward, it was fuxed up. All I did was try to put the fire out.

So this is part of the reason that I wanted to beat his ass already.

[Crazy Asian]

Well did you kick your friend's ass. I would have. I would have gotten my shoe and shoved his gay ass.

[HvyArms]

No, I didnt kick his ass.

See he was 17, and I was 19. He was released to his dads custody, I got sent to Rice street. But his dad is the one who came to get me once I was eventually released.

Now even though he was the one who started the damn fire, I was the one with the firearm and the stolen credit card...long story.

So he didnt get charged with Arson, but I got charged with possession of stolen property, and possession of a firearm. So he went home, and I went to jail.

He DIDNT get his ass kicked, because he lied to his dad and told him that they kept me because I had a traffic warrant. Plus he convinced his dad to come pick me up, so that I wouldnt have to call my parents.

and

He never told anyone what happened (of course not, because he was crying), so my parents never found out. And when I went back to court, I was alone. Then when the judge called me to the podium, I turned around and saw him walk into the court room. So he was the only person there with me, and at the end of it all, the charges were all dismissed.

And Im happy I didnt kick his ass, because he was murdered a year later. Plus he was a good friend.

[Crazy Asian]

That sucks.

[HvyArms]

:sigh: yeah, we had some wild times together. I miss him, but life goes on.

[TRDwasiq]

A cop pulled me over on 85 thats wht he said( why the hell did u cut me 3 time at 90mph and put hazards on)there is thing with me if anyone yell at or somethin i start smilin haha he was like why the hell are u smilin i was idk its my style he was like huh forreal u goin to jail. he said get out then he pulled out a gun askin bunch of stupid question like r u drunk or wht eva. stupid bitch did'nt even asked for my licence after askin all those question he said give me ur licence and told me to put my hands on my trunk and dont move i was like ok. he came back after 5 min sayin i dont wana give u ur first ticket tonight just dont play with ur friends life and never race a cop

[HvyArms]

Now, thats funny. That cop was pissed off, you better be happy he didnt shoot you lol. WTF were you doing?

[Crazy Asian]

He was going 85 mph in a corolla. COp thought he was racing him. Tried to tell him stop by cutting him off with hazards but he wouldnt. Then he get pulled over. LOL

[TRDwasiq]

racing my friends maxima and i saw a car behind me tryin to catch up so i cut him 3 times and put my hazards on it turns out that it was a cop