Or hell Ill go into my own person BS.

I am a very skepitcal person. I had a lot of friends who were "church nerds" or whatever, but they were still good friends of mine. I grew up with the guys, was in boyscouts with some of them and so on. There was one particular friend, his name is Matt. His last name will not be shared. Matt really took well to church, he was always helping out around the events, he did the school events and damn a lot of people looked up to him. I consider him like an older brother, great guy and Ill never forget him.

Well story in a nutshell, hanging out with some buddies one night working on a particular GTO Matt was there. I pulled Matt aside for a minute, and said when he had a chance sometime this week I had something I needed his help on. ( I was very general about it, I sorta made it out to be school related) Well a week went by, I got a chance to meet up with him at his house. He happened to be with another church like buddy which sorta confused me, but whatever. We all were BSing and all that but Matt finally asked what I needed help with. Flat out, right there, I asked Matt why he believed in God.

And what truely impressed me (I guess God wanted to impress me this day) is that Matt didn't have to clear his throat, or even pause for a second. Matt knew I was going to ask that exact question, and for about a week he had been looking up verses and particular stuff he wanted to show me. Matt told me about faith, lots of christain stuff I didn't know and so on. I wasnt raised by a church family, I wouldn't know this. I actually had to ask who the virgin mary was.... (yes I know, Im a retard lol)

Well time went on, I went to church with Matt quite a few times, I tried to embrace religion or whatever, but it honestly wasnt doing much for me. I questioned it a lot, I thought of the skeptical parts in which I could disprove, and so on.

So a couple years go on, I never really accepted god into my life and I went about my business. But something happened. Its about 5:10 am on a thursday morning, I wake up to my buddy slamming on my window on my apartment in statesboro ga. I check my phone for the time and I have 28 missed calls and 7 texts. "Oh ****" I thought to myself, this better be good.

Well, as most of you heard in the news and I made a thread about it. Lauren Ashley Burk of Auburn had been murdered. It was all over the news, this girl was a freshman at Auburn was murdered. I have literally never known a sweeter girl in my entire life. She was gorgeous, smart, and just wow... such a sweetheart. Anyways, I find out what happened, end up going to waffle house with the group in statesboro that used to hang out with her... (About 5 of us really knew her well down there), we all make a few phone calls to old friends, it was really hard.

Well this particular weekend, every single person of the old friends from whatever college came back to the area (Marietta) for sort of a reuinion thing. Again it was hard, but it was good to see some old friends at a time like this. Most of us were pretty heart broken over this, as you might understand. The funeral was on saturday, we were all there. It was a pretty big funeral, I can't believe how many people came for her. Hey boyfriend Sean, had it rough boy... Damn... that guy was torn the hell up. The couple were very very close.

So the funeral goes on and just something about it continues in my heard and deep inside of me just the same as when I woke up 2 days before at 5:10am and I couldn't figure it out. It was bringing me down or bringing me up, I couldnt tell.

Long story short, I asked basically asked God in the funeral to guide me in my life and so on. And I am not embaressed at all to share that with compeltely random people. But however, point being as skeptical as I was it took something that big just for me to ask for God for help. However I was still looking for that sign, that thing that would happen to show me that I got my message to a higher power. So basically thats my leap of faith there.

A few weeks went by, and I hadn't thought about it, nor been waiting for that sign/message really. I realized it would come when it comes. So one night, I was with some friends, we smoked a joint. (Get over it) And at my state of mind I figured out that I never need a sign, I never had one originally because from then on I was openly telling people my story and spreading my faith. And it took something like that girl getting murdered to get me to make that leap of faith. And now I have complete faith in my religion, I know where I am going. I don't nessacery go to church every sunday, nor follow every single rule. But I don't think its about that. I think its about being a damn good person, helping those when they need, and just trying to do something with your life and appreciate it for what it is.

And the reason I brought up Matt in the first place is, on the way back to southern one night, I called Matt and told him what happened. He was estatic, we probably talked for like an hour and a half about everything that happened previously, that day we talked and I asked him why he believed in god and so much other stuff. But damn, all I can say is the lord works in misterious ways...

And as I think that, I couldn't be happier. I realized I needed to get out of southern, get back to kennesaw and get a job while in school to get me busy. I realized getting ano
her bike was a bad idea and Id probably end up hurt on one. And plenty of stuff other I realize.

But damn Ill tell you this, without that leap of faith my life would be completely different at the time. I wouldn't have a job that pays ridiculous for my age, most people would kill for a job like mine. (I don't discuss numbers) Ive re-found my bad habit of car projects (Hell it could be alot worse lol) and quite a few other things.


But any of you who question your situation, or religion and think to yourself when am I going to see something that sparks me or kicks my thinking to even consider faith, stop waiting. I found my answer/notion/sign whatever later on and I understand now.

I know someo of you will probably cut my post up, quote stuff out and call me out on things, but thats fine. Go for it. Its meaningless, your not going to talk me out of something.