Three nuns are walking back to the convent after volunteering at a nursing home. Suddenly, three guys jump out and, at gunpoint, pull off their habits and begin having sex with them.

The first nun looks skyward and says "lord, forgive him.. he knows not his sin"

The second nun looks up and says "Lord forgive this man. He does not know what he does"

The third nun looks up and says "Good GOD this one does!"


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A man is driving down the road, and sees a nun on the side of the road, hitchiking. Out of pity, he pulls over. The nun and he have a good conversation, and soon the man feels he needs to come clean.

"I have to be honest with you... I've always wanted to kiss a nun... May I kiss you?" The man asks. The nun looks surprised, but agrees.

A few miles later, the nun starts giggling.

"What's so funny?" the man asks.

"I have to be honest... I'm not a nun... I'm on my way to a costume party, and my name's John"

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What did one lesbian frog say to the other?

"Damn baby we DO taste like chicken"

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A bear comes across a rabbit in the woods. Just before the bear swipes the fatal blow, he has a change of heart.

"Just go" the bear says to the rabbit. At that moment, a fairy appears.

"I am the good deed fairy. Because you, mister bear, spared the life of Mr. Rabbit, I will give you each three wishes. Mr. Bear, we will start with you."

The bear things for a minute. "I wish every bear in this area was a female bear". The fairy closed her eyes, and said "it is so"

The rabbit grinned, and said "I wish for a motorcycle." POOF, a shiny new F4i appears.

The bear looks at him, confused, but makes his next wish. "I wish the bears in the NEXT forest were all females". The fairy wiggled her nose and said "it is so".

The rabbit giggles, and says "I wish for a crash helmet". POOF, a helmet appears in the rabbit's paws. He puts it on and swings a leg over his new bike.

The bear is confused at the rabbit's odd wishes, but makes his final wish "Alright.. I wish every bear in the WORLD was a female bear, so I'm the only male bear in the world!" The fair wiggled her nose and said "it is so".

The fairy turns to the rabbit, and says "and your final wish, Mr. Rabbit?"

Mr Rabbit revs his motorcycle, and as he pulls away, he yells "I WISH MR. BEAR WAS GAY!"