so im sleeping and i get up for a cigarette. i walk outside and and im about halfway done with my unusually good for whatever reason Marlboro red when i hear a sound coming from the side of my house.. i couldnt see what was going on, but i did hear some screaming and wrestling noises so i was like.. OMG WTF!.. immediately i thought someone was breaking into my house or something while i was outside.. so i rush back in.. nothing.. few minutes later my neighbor knocks on my door angry as all hell "WTF is all that damn noise?" and i answered "dude... i dont know, i heard it too".. and he says "OH... sorry"... so we both decide to walk out to the side of my house with a light (which is like a grass alley between his house and mine and.... we find the following.



a huge dead armadillo.. WTF??????

seriously.. was it this thing making all the noise WTF? right?????


we keep looking around and we find the shocking following:



2 Ki's of YAYO (cocaine for the idiots) in a black plastic bag.... WEIRD.


so my neighbor is like "WTF THIS MAKES NO SENSE"

a few feet from the black plastic bag we find this:


a fucking weird looking nike shoe which i put on a shelf in my garage... who made it?..where did it come from .. WHAT THE FUCK IS IT!!!?




anyway.. we thought this whole thing was REALLY weird, and i was about to rush back in to get my cell and call the authorities. my neighbor says "WAIT man.. i dont think thats coke", and i say "dude.. i know coke, thats coke, i just tasted it".. and he says "i think you're wrong... come in the house", so we go to his house and he slaps the bags on the table and brings out some weird little accessories and does the following:




he takes a few lines, and finally admits "OK... its coke".... so i proceed to call the police and he says "WAIT NO!... i'll give you 100 bucks if you shut up about it" and i said OK.


anyway.. thats my morning before work.