Quote Originally Posted by Fred Sanford
Dear Mr. Bottle,
It is with deep regret that I inform you that I cannot reveal my identity to anyone. While I have no fear, I would hate to lose the mystique that has come to be associated with Fred G. Sanford.
Best Regards,

Mr. Fred G. Sanford Esq.
Dear Mr. Sanford,

I have much power and access to many things on this forum that mere mortals can not see. It is only a matter of time before I figure it out, but I was hoping you would save me some time. When I do, you can be assured Mr. Sanford that your secret will be safe with me.

Sincerely,

Mr. BT L. Fed the First