hey geoff i found god! ya like a few seconds ago bro, omg it was awesome...it has hit me


everything makes sense now! i think god created the universe with me in mind, and when i sleep god in heaven keeps a notebook where he makes notes of all naughty sex dreams and when i die he opens this books and says

"heeeey you had naughty dreams and thoughts and once you masturbated so thats bad also and even though you never killed or raped anyone you are going to hell because you worked on sundays and sundays are everyones day off because when i created the planet i had to sleep on the seventh day because i was tired oh and you had sex before you were married so that only adds to your evil ways... you'll stay in hell forever and everyone that never sinned will get to heaven where they will spend an eternity with me and that means they get to praise me 24-7 for an eternity."

yeah i love god

my bible tells me everything about space that i need to know. it should totally get the nobel prize for physics and medicine