Quote Originally Posted by Lizbiz101
IMO that song represents how some men do not know when to grow up. We have men that are 35 years old still living at home. They want a independent woman with her own car, her own house so that she can take care of him. Some men just want another mom. Men should want to take care of their woman, not the other way around.
I only used the song to introduce my question... My issue is with, I guess, the men that DONT want another mom. They are trying to take care of me, but I dont let them cuz I am so worried about feeling like I owe them something.

Quote Originally Posted by LQQKITZME
I think it has hurt relationships. I was married to a great woman, but there was always a power struggle. And that ultimately ended the relationship. I don't want a mother, I want a wife. I mean a guy wants to feel like he is the head of the household. Not very many men want to feel like they have very little say so or input into the relationship. As a man you are brought up to be the head of the house.. Not owner of that person but not their slave either. As a man it made me feel worthless, even affected my libido.

I still love this woman and miss her terribly


I might be a little off topic as well but.. just felt like venting
Nah you're not off topic. Like I said I wanted opinions and different view points. As I stated prevfiously though, I think that marriage is a whole different thing all together. I feel that by the time that marriage is considered both parties should know what role they play and do so accordingly. No, it wont be perfect but by this time you should have an idea of what works and what doesnt work from the courtship stage.

Quote Originally Posted by 'chell
AMEN SISTA!!! Could not have said it better myself. Once things get more serious or they marry, it can be a problem if he is not contributing financially. There can be a power struggle over the finances. His low self esteem and feelings of inadequacy may get the better of him and the relationship, causing problems in other areas...

I can take care of myself, but that doesn't mean I want to be on top all the time, lol!!
But see why let it even get that far if there is going to be an issue about money? If I marry it will be for love. I have dated plenty of men that dont make as much as I do... I have dated a couple that make more. When I date people, the last thing on my mind is, "Can he provide for me?" Probably because I am worrying about whether or not we will click enough to continue dating. Of course over time you will find out who makes what and you will also notice who is the one that pays all the time and can tell if it is expected.

OFFTOPIC A LIL BIT:::
I dated one guy that had no job and would always come over my apt right in time for me to cook dinner. He knew that I would make enough for us to eat, but after a while I noticed that because I was giving him gas money, I was feeding him, he didnt have to do a damn thing and that didnt fly for me. I need someone by my side that is as ambitious and driven as me. We gotta go places and I dont want to drag you there...

Quote Originally Posted by 8AFORD
if a woman can be independent then thats great but i have always like buying something a nice ... at the flea market. haha\ but i think hot head woman are annoying but if u wanna pay for yourself gohead
I can and have been a hot headed woman... You're right, it is probably annoying, but I dont get to that point for no reason.