Quote Originally Posted by Brett
Can you cry under water?

Sure, why not? You will prob. drown though

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

They have to be dead enough

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Sales tax.


Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for an eternity?

No, you will be naked and everyone will point and laugh at you.


Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

So that you will be able to pick it up with your thick-retaining-water fingers


What disease did cured ham actually have?

Mad Pork Disease


How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Cause the need for luggage only came after we figured out how to travel.


Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

So you're saying people can not wake up like every two hours? What about people with weak bladders? Old people? Like Brett?


If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

No it is called a sign languaging


Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Because you touch yourself at night

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

To see you touch yourself from a distance

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

To get the condoms and the KY jelly


Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

The same reason why Bra's are plural and Panty is singular


Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Because we are a diverse species and not everyone is a decent human being

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?


Because you obvisouly cared by bringing it up.

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

No. It is for two or more PERSONS. A corpse is a corpse.

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why leave when you are shagging Ginger?


Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Cause Goofy is fucking Pluto doggy-style


If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

The joy is in the hunt, not the catch


If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Dead Babies. DUH !!

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

No, but Reposts sure come from Brett


Why does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?

Because it is the same tune you play when you are touching yourself at night


Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

I didn't. But did you touch yourself again?


Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

No, I did not notice. Your point? I did notice this repost, however....

There are your answers.... LOL