The perfect day for Ruiner... v. timeline

[The Yousef]

A friend from another board wrote this about me, so I thought that I would share. I can't stop laughing...

THE PERFECT DAY FOR RUINER

6:43 sleep interrupted by persons of color attempting to steal Porsche 911 Turbo
6:44 burst into garage, mow down persons of color with AK-47
6:54 police arrive, compliments on marksmanship and choice of weapon for home defense
7:30 breakfast in tastefully-decorated dining area
8:00 leave for work
8:05 stop to fill Porsche 911 Turbo
8:06 display weapon to encroaching indigent, make mental note to tell OT about this
8:10 near fender-bender with landscaping truck
8:11 occupants of truck approach Porsche, appear agitated
8:12 deliver fatal headshots to each with H&K pistol, left-handed, while dialing 911 on cell
8:15 Doraville police arrive on scene, more compliments on marksmanship
8:25 Local Homeland Security representatives arrive, awarded "Freedom Fighter" status on the spot.
9:00 arrive at work
9:01 create thread discussing morning's events
12:00 leave for lunch
12:30 Arrive @ Chops w/father, numerous high-ranking GA officials
12:35 Apps, champagne, light banter centering on gun laws
12:40 dark-skinned waiter approaches table clutching package
12:41 waiter falls to the ground in a hail of fire
12:42 high-fives and good-natured arguing about who was first to hit center-mass
12:50 Police arrive on scene, package turns out to be a special recognition plaque from the NRA, but since you "can't be too careful" no charges are filed
1:00 Steaks and assorted side items arrive
2:00 back to work
2:01 more threads on OT
6:00 leave work, head to trendy club
6:25 doorman ushers you to private table
6:30 local pro athlete and entourage are seated next to you
6:31 blackberry post to OT mentioning athlete by name w/cam phone pic
10:00 arrive home, girlfriend has thoughtfully collected brass casings from garage and had them melted into Porsche statuette by local artist
10:05 post pics of brass Porsche on OT
11:00 bed, still-warm Glock nestled under pillow

that's hilarious!!!

btw:

why do they have to be colored folks Brandon!? why can't you gundown some white people instead!!??

why brandon?

why?

[Ruiner]

that's hilarious!!!

btw:

why do they have to be colored folks Brandon!? why can't you gundown some white people instead!!??

why brandon?

why?

They don't, but that makes reference to the black guy that opened the car door of my Porsche and got into the passenger side while I was still in the car. I put my Glock in his face and made him slowly get out of my car.

[The Yousef]

They don't, but that makes reference to the black guy that opened the car door of my Porsche and got into the passenger side while I was still in the car. I put my Glock in his face and made him slowly get out of my car.

oh shit!

i remember that!