Live from the Sydney Olympics

Hello, folks. We're live at the Sydney Olympics. Everyone is very excited about the fucking race. All eyes will be on anna kournikova who is representing canada. anna kournikova has already won 7 medals here in Sydney.

Here come the athletes now! anna kournikova looks a little small as she gets ready to race. And they're off. anna kournikova and jennifer anniston are neck and neck as they near the finish line. The crowd is on their feet drinking. anna kournikova has won, and it's a world record!

We quickly move to the medal ceremony. This is very emotional. We just heard that this is anna kournikova's last Olympics. Tears are in anna kournikova's eyes as the canada flag is raised and “bother” is played. It's a(n) green day for anna kournikova and all the people from canada.