LIRL at the beatdown stories.

The main lesson I learned from my dad was this - If that man is mad enough to have the belt out, I musta done something BAD. Like, end of the world 7 deadly sins bad. Little poofy haired blonde kid running through the house with the neverending scream going (you know, the one where kids scream and it's like they never need a breath?)... BIG man lumbering after, belt in hand. And no matter how fast I ran, he could always WALK and be right behind me. ooooooooh makes my butt sting just thinking about it. And then there was mom. I remember I was about 8 and she thwacked me one good one with a spatula on the shoulder (I was sneaking cookies). Trying to be hard, I looked at her and laughed. She let me laugh for a minute. Just as I turned to go, she fucking CONNECTED with the back of my head with the wooden spoon. DEAR GOD THE PAIN! I ran off crying like a little bitch. Note to self. Never laugh at already angry mother....