I'm busy trying to imagine you with a personality. Maybe you'd be less boring once I got to know you, but I don't want to take that chance... too risky and you may be contagious. 5'9 170 is hardly "short". You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. Maybe you wouldn't be such a bimbo if you weren't so dumb that even blondes tell jokes about you; if your weren't so fat that all the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 80 Patrons OR You.", or if you didn't have a face that people shove in dough to make monster cookies. No, come to think of it, you would.

In closing, why don't you put your glasses on backwards and walk into yourself? (j/k, I still love you)