>>> A senior at Alabama was overheard saying... "When the end of the

>>> world comes, I hope to be in Alabama." When asked why, he

>>replied

>>> he'd rather be in Alabama because everything happens in Alabama

>>20

>>> years later than in the rest of the civilized world.

>>

>>> ========================================

>>> An Alabama State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-85.

>>

>>> The trooper asked, "Got any ID?"

>>

>>> The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

>>

>>> ========================================

>>> A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in

>>twos

>>> for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone,

>>staggering

>>> under the weight of an eight-point buck.

>>

>>> "Where's Henry?" the others asked.

>>

>>> "Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up

>>the

>>> trail," the successful hunter replied.

>>

>>> "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they

>>

>>> inquired.

>>

>>> "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going

>>to

>>> steal Henry!"

>>

>>> ========================================

>>> The young man from Alabama came running into the store and said

>>to

>>> his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the

>>

>>> parking lot!"

>>

>>> Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?"

>>

>>> The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license

>>

>>> number."

>>

>>> ========================================

>>> NEWS FLASH! - Alabama's worst air disaster occurred when a

>>small

>>> two-seater Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two University of Alabama

>>

>>> students, crashed into a cemetery earlier today.

>>

>>> Search and Rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and

>>

>>> expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

>>

>>> The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery

>>efforts.

>>> ========================================

>>> A man in Alabama had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the

>>road,

>>> and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and

>>one

>>> behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.

>>

>>> A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious

>>

>>> he turned around and went back.

>>

>>> He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I

>>have a

>>> flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"

>>

>>> The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put

>>flares

>>> in the front and flares in the back! I never did understand it

>>either."

>>> ======================================

>>> The owner of a golf course in Alabama was confused about paying

>>an

>>> invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical

>>help.

>>> He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from The

>>

>>> University of Alabama and I need some help. If I were to give

>>you

>>> $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

>>

>>> The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but my

>>

>>> earrings."

>>

>>> You gotta love them Alabama women.