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Thread: how to get out of a speeding ticket

  1. #1
    The coolest chick SM The Ren's Avatar
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    Default how to get out of a speeding ticket

    A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

    Officer: May I see your driver's license?
    Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

    Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
    Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

    Officer: The car is stolen?
    Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

    Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
    Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

    Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
    Driver: Yes, sir.

    Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

    Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
    Driver: Sure. Here it is.

    It was valid.

    Captain: Who's car is this?
    Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card.

    The driver owned the car.

    Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
    Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

    Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

    Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.
    Driver: No problem.

    Trunk is opened; no body.

    Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

    Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!
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  2. #2
    Stacks on deck. imbosile's Avatar
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    Default

    hahahaha awesome.... ill use that next time..!

  3. #3
    Banned JMCIVIC01's Avatar
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    Default

    thats great

  4. #4
    I Just Wanna Be Loved... 99ITRGIRL's Avatar
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    Default

    lol good one!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kevykev
    No "I" in Team?? But there's a "U" in sUck lololol
    Quote Originally Posted by AtifSajid
    You momma so stupid she told everyone to repost shit.
    http://www.myspace.com/ashtonluv

  5. #5
    Senior Member BlueHatch's Avatar
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    Coolest ish i have ever heard.well except my buddy being a hero but it is a damn close second

  6. #6
    Echinsu Ocha Pher's Avatar
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    Funny but as old as dirt.

  7. #7
    Better than you
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    I'd never actually read that before. Good one baby.
    Just some punk trying to get by...

    "I'm not worried about AIDS. I don't fuck guys"- Jason

    "Mikey is a Jewish-American princess"

    Hump Her Crew Member

  8. #8
    Public Enemy #1
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    HAHAHAHAHA...... ...... the sad thing was...that i could picture someone doing that in my head to whole time!

  9. #9
    Cav-E-R's Lesbian Seagull Kristi's Avatar
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    i got that email awhile back. it is so funny
    Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it!

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  10. #10
    Something Else Kevykev's Avatar
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    Yeah let me try that so i can somehow get incarcerated for 10 years.

    Leisa and S. 4 Life NM?

  11. #11
    A day late, a buck short BufordŽ's Avatar
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    I'm going to be the first to say it. Repost. But still a very good one. Didn't bother me at all to read it again.
    My 2001 Acura 3.2CL Type-S


    Val for president!
    Yes, I would have voted for her.
    In loving memory of Valerie Antranikian.

  12. #12
    A.K.A. GA Teg
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    ok ok, repost
    "A good photograph is knowing where to stand."
    www.ATLphoto.net Myspace

  13. #13
    Cav-E-R's Lesbian Seagull Kristi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GA_Teg
    ok ok, repost
    Thats funny
    Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it!

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  14. #14
    Certified Gearhead MrEG62U's Avatar
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    thats great


    posted by 01dc2 jdm
    its just a vtack engine.

  15. #15
    Chargin
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    Good one

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