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Thread: Government Job.

  1. 11-23-2009, 11:49 AM #1
    xxbckiexx
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    Default Government Job.

    A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

    He replies, "Yes, caffeine."

    "Have you ever been in the military service?"

    "Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for two years."

    The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"

    The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both of my testicles.

    The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10:00 A.M. every day."

    The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M., why don't you want me here until 10:00 A.M.?"

    "This is a government job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."


    lolol
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

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  2. 11-23-2009, 11:51 AM #2
    BluesClues
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    lulz
    THAT'S MY JAM!
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  3. 11-23-2009, 12:00 PM #3
    lcortes32
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    you made my morning

    no homo

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  4. 11-23-2009, 12:14 PM #4
    Elbow
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    Hahalollerskates
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  5. 11-23-2009, 01:01 PM #5
    IndianStig
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    excellent!
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  6. 11-23-2009, 01:03 PM #6
    punkr6
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    sad but true...
    NO ADVERTISING

    -IA MANAGEMENT
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  7. 11-23-2009, 01:05 PM #7
    TSiFTW
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    lololol.
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  8. 11-23-2009, 01:06 PM #8
    goi_ek
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    lol
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  9. 11-23-2009, 01:45 PM #9
    vkash1208
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    i work for the government..i do that my entire shift.
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  10. 11-23-2009, 01:54 PM #10
    HalfBaked
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    I don't get it...

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  11. 11-23-2009, 01:59 PM #11
    xxbckiexx
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    Quote Originally Posted by HalfBaked View Post
    I don't get it...
    he has no balls, and he's allergic to caffeine. Thus, for the first two hours (in which all they do is drink caffeine and scratch their testicles) he will have nothing to do, so they tell him not to come in. Get it now????
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    _██_
    (ಠ_ృ) Riveting tale, chap.
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  12. 11-23-2009, 02:01 PM #12
    HalfBaked
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    So ummm why can't he drink decaf coffee...

    And what do the lazy female employees do..

    This story has too many holes for it to be true...

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  13. 11-23-2009, 02:03 PM #13
    blue94eg6
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    LOL
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  14. 11-23-2009, 02:03 PM #14
    xxbckiexx
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    Quote Originally Posted by HalfBaked View Post
    So ummm why can't he drink decaf coffee...

    And what do the lazy female employees do..

    This story has too many holes for it to be true...
    they dont' make decaf. they drink regular to pump themselves up for the normal work day!

    the females MAKE the coffee for the men, and provide baked goods. They don't have time to do anything else for those 2 hours because they are catering to the men.

    get it now?
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    _██_
    (ಠ_ృ) Riveting tale, chap.
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  15. 11-23-2009, 02:05 PM #15
    HalfBaked
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    No.

    Why can't he come in and help bake or make coffee?

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  16. 11-23-2009, 02:06 PM #16
    xxbckiexx
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    Quote Originally Posted by HalfBaked View Post
    No.

    Why can't he come in and help bake or make coffee?

    Cuz he's a fucking MAN. MEN don't bake or make coffee when there's women to do it. DUH.
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    _██_
    (ಠ_ృ) Riveting tale, chap.
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  17. 11-23-2009, 02:11 PM #17
    HalfBaked
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    But he doesn't have balls.

    Isn't that what qualifies a man from a woman?

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  18. 11-23-2009, 02:14 PM #18
    G.C
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    hahahahahh +7 to HalfBaked. lolll
    :idb:
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  19. 11-23-2009, 02:37 PM #19
    xxbckiexx
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    Quote Originally Posted by HalfBaked View Post
    But he doesn't have balls.

    Isn't that what qualifies a man from a woman?
    No. The fact that he lost his balls in a manly venture qualifies him as more of a man then all men. If he were to have balls, and not use them, then he would not be a man.
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    _██_
    (ಠ_ృ) Riveting tale, chap.
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  20. 11-23-2009, 03:01 PM #20
    dohc4.6sc
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    wow y'all analyze shit WAY to fuckin much. lol.
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  21. 11-23-2009, 03:11 PM #21
    xxbckiexx
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    Quote Originally Posted by dohc4.6sc View Post
    wow y'all analyze shit WAY to fuckin much. lol.
    he started it. i finished it.
    Way Too Big

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    _██_
    (ಠ_ృ) Riveting tale, chap.
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