do this,

Gather:
Vaseline
A bag of sand
and a single latex glove.

Step one: put latex glove on.
Step two: Open the Vaseline and scoop out as much as u can.
Step three: Flop it on the windshield and smear.
Step Five: With your other hand, grab a shit ton of sand and throw it on the windshield.
Step six: Wait.