so i figure today has started out odd enough that i should go ahead and make a JM thread about it...

SO lets start when it allll began...



ring..... grrr... come on seriously! UGH! WTF?! oh yeah... sigh work today. blah! oh well time to get out and get a move on! LETS GO!!

then it happened....


i was already running late and now i felt like i had been violated by a random fist whilst holding muh coffee in the comfort of my own bed... WHY! what just happened?!?!

either way my head was pounding like a snoop dogg song on a 15" subwoofer in the back of a caprice donk!


i climbed out of bed and managed to get my way to the shower... only to find out that there was a moth keepin it real on the wall... now normally i don't care about these things and let them live... except... it was about this big...


i screamed like a loli after a amy-san attack from the side window of a new genesis driven by some asian kid!


after the intial fear had passed and i was ready to do battle... so i ran to the armory loaded up and was ready for the biggest battle of my morning to commence...


with weapons drawn and my battle cry i leapt into the shower and was prepared to do defeat my foe with a single thrust of my sword!... or in this case paper towel roll...

a quick leap to the right, roll to the left, avoiding certain peril and running out of time i knew i had to go on the offensive... but my adversary seemed determined to win....

THEN KIERA KNIGHTLY APPEARED @ my side as my ally in battle...

z0mg! KIERA>.. j00 come to halps mi!!?!?

and she was all like YA! and i was like o rly? and she was like ABUNAI! and saved me from the ensueing shockwave from his powerful wings.


this battle had to come to an end soon, my house was being destroyed, kiera was being sexy, and well i was still getting farther away from being @ work on time...so we did what was only natural for us to do in this situation...

called brett and his butterfly net to save us


i know i know, how did brett get to HHI so fast.. well if you must ask, he's rather aero dynamic with those high socks and tucked in high trousers GOOD GOING BRETT NOW I CAN GET ON WITH MY DAY!

and the people rejoiced.

after what seems to be like hours i'm finally in my car... Z0MG I FEEL SOOOO BAD! AND ITS 7:51 z0mg! i'ma be lates!

fast forward through traffic considering nothing really happened today... which is an odd occurance.


as i shifted into 3rd to get away i noticed something out of the corner of my eye... he swung around in the median, but hasn't given chases yet... maybe i don't need to run... up shift to 6th again. hmm... maybe he just wanted to turn around... idk.

then just as i let out the clutch i noticed the vehicle surge to life as it always seemed to do a wheel stand in mid morning traffic! the chase was on! HALEY BATTLE MODE CODE ZERO! NOW! IKE! DEPLOY DEPTH CHARGES AND FLARES!


I feint left to right, come on direzzas! don't stop gripping now! the tail swings wildly into the left sweeper as i realize the grip won't last... some fancy pedal work and a sigh of relief later the car comes back under control and the cop is no where to be found... HA HA! victory is mine... no one can catch me, i'm the loli hunting man!


well, welcome to work as i ease into the parking lot @ a pawltry 4 mph. then as i was about to blip the throttle to resume 1st gear... i look up in the rear view...



BAM! FRICKIN CAUGHT! ITS NOT EVEN FAIR! I MEAN I CROSSED THE FINISH LINE FIRST! WHAT THE FOO!>!>!



anyways he got me in a 75/55 but i will say this! i had the coolest cop ever, dude dropped it to a 64/55 and took off the 2 points. basically my $220 ticket with 2 points got reduced to $80 and 0 points. i got caught (which i rarely do, so basically i've been due for about 2 years with some of the stuff i get away with) so no worries! cop was super nice, which is a rarity too. so either way. that was my morning...