Too gay for his bow?
Too Sexy for his Bow
Gimli, Legolas, Aragorn and the hobbits sat down at a cozy booth in the prancing pony. Legolas sat back comfortably, happy that Sauron was defeated, and that he could relax.
" So, Legolas," said Gimli, taking a sip of his beer before he continued, " ever done anything daring in your immortal life?"
Legolas looked like he had been slapped.
" Of course I had done some daring things in my life! What do you take me for?"
" All right then, name at least one thing you have done during your lifetime." Legolas blushed as he couldn’t think of anything.
They all laughed.
" Poor Legolas," said Aragorn. " Let’s leave him alone."
" Fine! You want me to do something daring? Then I’ll do something daring!" he slammed his ale on the table and got up and walks to the little stage near the women. There were more women there then the men, and Legolas was glad…because what he was about to do…was not intended for the male audience. Legolas got up nervously, but he had to do it. He had to make others think that he wasn’t some girly man that liked to frolic in the forest or whatever. He could do something daring!
1 I’m too sexy for my bow
Too sexy for my bow
It hurts
I’m too sexy for Gondor…too sexy for Gondor
Mirkwood and Fangorn………
And I’m too sexy for Mirkwood, too sexy for Mirkwood
Nobody could look as good.
I’m a wood elf, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, yeah
I do my little turn on the cat walk
I’m too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party
No way I’m doing swing
And I’m too sexy for my hair
Too sexy for my hair
Too sexy for my hair, you can’t help but stare
I’m a wood elf, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, yeah
I shake my little toosh on the cat walk
I’m too sexy for my…
Too sexy for my…
(Legolas proceeds to take off his tunic, and throws it to the girls in front, the fellowship is quite taken aback! Sorry ladies, no more than the shirt! I’m sticking with the PG rating! ^_~*)
" Oh my--" Gimli couldn’t finish as Legolas continued.
I’m a wood elf, you know what I mean
1.1 And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, yeah
I shake my little toosh on the cat walk
And I’m too sexy for my shirt
Too sexy for my shirt it hurts…
( Legolas removed the tunic, but had another shirt under it. He removed the shirt to reveal his chest. The fellowship almost all choked on their ale. The women stole the piece of clothing.)
And I’m too sexy for the one ring
Too sexy for the one ring, it stings….
Love’s going to leave me.
And I’m too sexy for this song.
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