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Thread: F My Life

  1. 02-17-2009, 09:41 PM #1
    FTMFW
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    Default F My Life

    Post up your favorite quote(s) from fmylife.com

    Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

    Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

    Today, my boss asked me to pick up an extra shift. I said I couldn't because I have a date. He told me I didn't need to lie and to just say no next time. FML

    Edit: Or if you have one of your own it would be more interesting.
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  2. 02-17-2009, 09:43 PM #2
    15degvee
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    That site is fucking LOL
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  3. 02-17-2009, 09:43 PM #3
    90_ACCORD
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    haha i love that second one
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  4. 02-17-2009, 09:45 PM #4
    15degvee
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    Today, while at work I was reading "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to me class of 5 year olds. I got near the end of the book and said "Look at the big fat caterpillar" to which one of my pupils replied "Just like you, Miss!" FML
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  5. 02-17-2009, 09:49 PM #5
    90_ACCORD
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    Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML
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  6. 02-17-2009, 09:50 PM #6
    15degvee
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    Today, I had to call my mom and tell her about the insurance claim that is going to be coming through in the next couple weeks. I spent the night in the hospital. I'm allergic to lube. FML
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  7. 02-17-2009, 09:52 PM #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by 15degvee
    Today, I had to call my mom and tell her about the insurance claim that is going to be coming through in the next couple weeks. I spent the night in the hospital. I'm allergic to lube. FML
    I don't get it..?
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  8. 02-17-2009, 09:55 PM #8
    90_ACCORD
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    Quote Originally Posted by FTMFW
    I don't get it..?
    is it talking about her health insurance?

    not car insurance like most would think
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  9. 02-17-2009, 10:00 PM #9
    90_ACCORD
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    Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
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  10. 02-17-2009, 10:01 PM #10
    G.C
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    lol nice.
    :idb:
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  11. 02-17-2009, 10:06 PM #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by 90_ACCORD
    Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
    LOLOL nice one.
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  12. 02-17-2009, 10:16 PM #12
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    ..
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  13. 02-17-2009, 10:17 PM #13
    15degvee
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    Quote Originally Posted by FTMFW
    I don't get it..?
    She had to essplain to her mum she was doing some IDB and broke out...
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  14. 02-17-2009, 10:18 PM #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by 15degvee
    She had to essplain to her mum she was doing some IDB and broke out...
    "explain"

    Gotchya
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  15. 02-17-2009, 10:30 PM #15
    Friggintitsman
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    I have no lol from this
    I thrive on caffineand HATE

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  16. 02-17-2009, 10:43 PM #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Friggintitsman
    I have no lol from this
    Fuck yo "lol" nagger
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  17. 02-17-2009, 10:55 PM #17
    isa2o3
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    today i went to a 2 hour conference of the Aflac company to seek internship. turned out i didnt need to be there. all i had to do is apply online ans read their company policies online. fml
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  18. 02-17-2009, 11:01 PM #18
    Master Shake
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    Today, my girlfriend and I had sex for the first time. When I was on top of her, she asked me if it was in yet. I said yes. She sighed. FML
    MY CIVIC
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  19. 02-17-2009, 11:14 PM #19
    15degvee
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tran
    Today, my girlfriend and I had sex for the first time. When I was on top of her, she asked me if it was in yet. I said yes. She sighed. FML
    That + you username and sig pic =
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  20. 02-17-2009, 11:18 PM #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by 15degvee
    That + you username and sig pic =
    LMFAO, damn that's fucked up in so many different ways.

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  21. 02-17-2009, 11:54 PM #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by 15degvee
    That + you username and sig pic =
    dude, you're a jew.
    MY CIVIC
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  22. 02-18-2009, 07:44 AM #22
    15degvee
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tran
    dude, you're a jew.
    it was a coincidence
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  23. 02-18-2009, 08:06 AM #23
    AnthonyF
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    some of them are funny, but sound very fake.

    -Ant.
    The Carbon Fibered R6
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  24. 02-18-2009, 08:10 AM #24
    AnthonyF
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    LOLOL THIS HAS TO BE TRUE for some. lol

    Today, My boyfriend dumped me because he said the relationship was too tough for him. When I asked for an example he responded "Like, I don't have enough time to play World of WarCraft." FML

    -Ant.
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  25. 02-18-2009, 09:35 AM #25
    Kevykev
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    Funny ones in there

    Leisa and S. 4 Life NM?
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  26. 02-18-2009, 10:07 AM #26
    Dr.G35
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    Quote Originally Posted by 90_ACCORD
    Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
    lol
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  27. 02-18-2009, 12:42 PM #27
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    MOAR!!!
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  28. 02-18-2009, 01:51 PM #28
    87 Turbo II
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    Today, I walked into my room to find my mom had made my bed and done my laundry, for which I thanked her with a hug. I laid down on the bed, stretched out my arms and realized my vibrator was still under the pillow where I had left it. FML

    Today, My boyfriend gave me a gift card for $32 to a local salon. I thought the amount was kind of random, but when I went in I saw that the bikini wax was $32. FML

    ^^ Yeah, I drew a frame of a man running on each fan blade. That is him running at idle
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  29. 02-18-2009, 01:56 PM #29
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    lololol
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  30. 02-18-2009, 02:06 PM #30
    ztastic
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    hahahah
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  31. 02-18-2009, 02:09 PM #31
    umairejaz
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    Quote Originally Posted by 87 Turbo II
    Today, My boyfriend gave me a gift card for $32 to a local salon. I thought the amount was kind of random, but when I went in I saw that the bikini wax was $32. FML

    LOLOL!

    Learning everyday.
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