Today I've identified 15 objects on my desk that could kill a person.

[thecrazyone]

http://www.onesentence.org

some pretty funny stuff... its just one liner's submitted my people, about any and everything heres a few more....

The most romantic moment of my life ended with the word "boner."

He sent me flowers on my eighteenth birthday with a note that said "Glad you're legal."

It was the perfect revenge, until I came home and the cops were already waiting for me.

I used to think a futon was a cross between a crouton and a wonton, and would always get weird looks from the waitstaff when I'd try to order one at an Asian restaurant.

I have to choose between anti-depressants and weight loss, when half the reason I'm depressed is because I'm fat.

haha ok if you want more go to the website lol

[thecrazyone]

"Leave the pizza on the futon and I'll eat it for breakfast" would be the most collegiate sentence ever uttered, if only I had worked in the word "toga."

i thought that one was pretty funny.

and another..

I knew my step-son had been overly sheltered when he told me a character from Guitar Hero III was the "black version of Jimi Hendrix."

LOL

[teg_seven]

I knew my step-son had been overly sheltered when he told me a character from Guitar Hero III was the "black version of Jimi Hendrix."

LOL

hahaha
thats classic

[nreggie454]

Some of those are good, but the overwhelming majority are emo fags submitting their boo hoos.

[thecrazyone]

Some of those are good, but the overwhelming majority are emo fags submitting their boo hoos.

now that i have gone through a few pages of them you are right. still funny tho LOL

another.....

I sincerely hope whoever spat that gigantic loogie in their to-go box and left it on table #14 for my hand to stumble upon falls into a fiery pit of aborted pig fetuses.



one more...

I knew the trip to Dublin wasn't going to turn out as planned when my best friend woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me if the rugby player on the other side of our hostel room was dead.

i cant stop reading these. i need to walk away from my comp.

[SouthSide Tay]

alot of them people should have kept to themselves.

[Mr_Mischif]

Dang, I though this thread was going to have more potential. A video would've been awesomesauce.

[TheGodfather]

Haha, I loled at the site.

[WalkS]

-We thought my dog had a tick and tried "smoking it out" with a hot match only to discover it was her nipple.
-He wanted to continue our morning romp, but our new kittens were sitting on the bed and they looked like a couple of dashboard bobble head ornaments watching us and he couldn't stop laughing.
-Ever since my electric toothbrush turned on in my bookbag that morning, I've been getting weird looks from people in my English class.
-Of all the things for a teacher to overhear me saying in class, "chafed areola" was probably not the best, even in context.

Aw man this website is funny!

[WalkS]

-I should have noticed the Adam's apple.

-My mother, being enraged, screamed "You son of a bi*ch", to which I replied, "Yes, I am."

-The regret came not when I chopped chilli for tea but much later on, when I picked my nose.

-He would complain that I wasn't feminine enough, but he left me for a dude.