Yeah I understand the way you feel about such pain, but the only thing that you can do right now is pray and hope everything turns out to be going into the better direction like everyone here on IA wishes. It tends to suck I know, but theres nothing much you can do right now, but damn, everyone that's even negative towards me will be in my prayers, I don't care who it is, it's just a messed up thing when somebody passes away. I feel sorry for you man, but stay up. L8r dude, I don't even know you, but LMK if you need anything.