I was on safari in Kenya. I shot what I thought was a huge silverback gorilla, turns out it was just a fat african. I was stuck in a kenyan prison until I could bribe my way out. I had to sneak into the wheel well of a outbound 747 to escape, as there were guards at all airport gates. As my luck would have it, the plane wasn't headed to the US but took me to vietnam instead. As soon as the plane circled to land and put the gear down, I was ejected. I managed to fall onto a thatched roof hut which cushioned me. Unfortunately this hut was part of a hidden POW camp. I fought off a few guards with hand-to-hand skills, then killed the rest with a large log. I freed 2 POW's who were F-4 pilots and drove them to Da Nang. From there I hopped a flight to Australia where I dove with some Great Whites. I fought 2 of them bare handed until they gave up and ran like pussies. Spend another 3 days sleeping, then flew back here. So now I'm home and decided to post.