"your name must be daisy, cuz i just got the sudden urge to plant you RIGHT here."

" I wish you were a door so i could slam you ALL day"


"Do you sleep on your stomach? [any answer] Can I?"


"Hey babe, how about a pizza and a fuck? uh.. no.. What's wrong, don't you like pizza?"


"Hey Baby! I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag!"


"Hey Baby! I'd like to use your legs as earmuffs!"


"Hey baby, wanna go halves on a bastard?"


"So i got this new magical watch that tells me you're not wearing any panties.. "yes i am..."" oh, it must be 10 minutes fast."


"If i had a 2 inch penis would you fuck me? uh.. no.. Good cuz mine is 9"


"you've been a bad girl.. GO TO MY ROOM!"


"Let's face it. I'm hot, you're hot and we both know you got a crush on me. And really, who can blame you with a gorgeous face like this. So can I snatch a kiss or vice-versa (that is kiss a snatch)."


"Grab your jacket, you've scored. Let's go."


"Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. She'd like your phone number. She wants to know where she can get a hold of me in the morning."


"Let me eat you for an hour. If you don't want to have sex after that, we won't."


"Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?"


"Do you mind if I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?"


"Is that a tic-tac in your shirt pocket or are you just glad to see me?"


"I'm sterile."


"I'm hungry and I'm on a liquid diet."


"Do I know you? (No.) That's a shame, I'd sure like to."


All of these have worked for me personally.. some more than once.. they're golden.