Another joke...

[nx2000det]

...for the ones that didnt like the last one.


A businessman was getting ready to go on a long business trip, so he thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a sex shop & explained his situation.

The man there said, "Well, I don't know tha t I h a ve anything that will keep her occupied for so many weeks, except... the Voodoo Penis!"

The husband said "The what"? The man repeated " The Voodoo Penis"
and pulled out what seemed to be an ordinary dildo. The husband laughed, and said, "It looks like a dildo!"

The man then pointed to the door and said, "Voodoo Penis, door!"

The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started pounding the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much that a crack began to form down the middle. Then the man said "Voodoo Penis, return to box!" and the penis stopped & returned to the box.


The husband bought it. He took it home to his wife, And after the husband had been gone a few days, the wife remembered the Voodoo Penis. She undressed, opened the box and said "Voodoo Penis, my crotch". The penis shot to her crotch.

It was absolutely incredible. After three mind shattering orgasms, she became very exhausted and decided she'd had enough. She tried to pull it out, but it w as stuck. Her husband had neglected to tell her how to turn it off. So she put her clothes on, got in her car and started for the hospital.

On the way, another incredibly intense orgasm made her swerve over the road. A police officer saw this and immediately pulled her over.

He asked for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink.

Gasping and twitching, the woman said "I haven't had anything to drink officer. You see, I've got this Voodoo Penis thing stuck in my crotch and it won't stop screwing me..."



The officer looked at her for a second, shook his head and replied,
"Yeah right... Voodoo Penis, my ass...!"


The rest, as they say, is history...

[quickdodge®]

Later, QD.

[BKgen®]

...for the ones that didnt like the last one.


A businessman was getting ready to go on a long business trip, so he thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a sex shop & explained his situation.

The man there said, "Well, I don't know tha t I h a ve anything that will keep her occupied for so many weeks, except... the Voodoo Penis!"

The husband said "The what"? The man repeated " The Voodoo Penis"
and pulled out what seemed to be an ordinary dildo. The husband laughed, and said, "It looks like a dildo!"

The man then pointed to the door and said, "Voodoo Penis, door!"

The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started pounding the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much that a crack began to form down the middle. Then the man said "Voodoo Penis, return to box!" and the penis stopped & returned to the box.


The husband bought it. He took it home to his wife, And after the husband had been gone a few days, the wife remembered the Voodoo Penis. She undressed, opened the box and said "Voodoo Penis, my crotch". The penis shot to her crotch.

It was absolutely incredible. After three mind shattering orgasms, she became very exhausted and decided she'd had enough. She tried to pull it out, but it w as stuck. Her husband had neglected to tell her how to turn it off. So she put her clothes on, got in her car and started for the hospital.

On the way, another incredibly intense orgasm made her swerve over the road. A police officer saw this and immediately pulled her over.

He asked for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink.

Gasping and twitching, the woman said "I haven't had anything to drink officer. You see, I've got this Voodoo Penis thing stuck in my crotch and it won't stop screwing me..."



The officer looked at her for a second, shook his head and replied,
"Yeah right... Voodoo Penis, my ass...!"


The rest, as they say, is history...

[GSRteg®]

Damn funny!

[nx2000det]

i guess the lesson to learn here is not to give up.
right?

[nx2000det]

Later, QD.

sad part is... i believe you

[quickdodge®]

sad part is... i believe you

That's the smart move. On your part. Later, QD.

[Frög]

^^ lolol

[BuBBa DRiFT]

i remember saying that joke in 6th grade. no lie.

[ShooterMcGavin]

funny but waaaaaaaaaaaay too old

[nx2000det]

A drunk phoned the police to report that thieves had broken in to his car.
'They've stolen the dashboard, steering wheel, break pedal, even the accelerator,' he cried out.
However, before the police investigation could get under way the phone rang a second time, with the same voice came over the line. 'Never mind,' said the drunk with a hiccup, 'I got in the
backseat by mistake.'

[Tatiana]

dude, i haven't heard that joke since middle school. i completely forgot about it. too hilarious!!

[Nitro]

funny shit bro +1

[sirkus]

A drunk phoned the police to report that thieves had broken in to his car.
'They've stolen the dashboard, steering wheel, break pedal, even the accelerator,' he cried out.
However, before the police investigation could get under way the phone rang a second time, with the same voice came over the line. 'Never mind,' said the drunk with a hiccup, 'I got in the
backseat by mistake.'

+1 awesome

[nx2000det]

oldies but goodies....
should i keep searching the archives????

[nx2000det]

A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks. "Yep," the Lab replies. "So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running."
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down.
I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters & listening in.
I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff.

[BKgen®]

oldies but goodies....
should i keep searching the archives????

No.

[nx2000det]

A husband and his blonde wife were driving along the country side one Sunday just putt puttin along.... as they were driving, the blonde saw another blonde out in an open field rowing a boat.
Out of sheer and utter shock she screamed to her husband "Stop.. stop this car right now!".
The blonde jumped out of the car and ran over to the fence.
She screamed at the top of her lungs " It's dumb ass blondes like you that give us such a bad name.... if I could swim I would come out there and whip your ass!"