Originally Posted by quickdodge®
A long time ago, far, far away, in a galaxy not much unlike our own, there was a planet that inhabited beings that were very similar to us humans. There were two sexes of these beings just as there are on Earth. Well at that time, Chris was a settler there and he was your average ant farmer. He sold ants, locally, in the flea market on weekends and he tended to his farm during the week. One day, he decided to go deep sea fishing. As he was fishing out in very deep waters, his boat ran up on a rock, whose apex was just below the surface of the sea. He started using a mallet he had on board to crush the stone so that he could get off the rock. At that time, a mermaid surfaced and offered to help. She was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. She pushed his boat into the sea and he was elated. So much so that he asked her to join him for dinner. She agreed. As they were eating a nice bucket of French-fried krill, he brought out the dessert. It was a chocolate covered, syrup drenched lemon cake almost the size of the boat. Just as he uncovered the dish, the mermaid's(aptly named Justine) mouth formed into the shape of a vacuum and she proceeded to suck, in one massive ingest, the whole cake in. She pulled it in so hard it bypassed the stomach and went straight to her bowels. Chris was so mad that he vowed to never let her rest easy again. And to this day, he has kept his word. Man. Later, QD.
