Johnny Cash

[Hulud]

is the mother fucking man!
that is all

[thinkfast®]

what the hell ever!

he would sooo get whooped by the man himself, Chuck fuckin Norris

[JustinSane110™]

what the hell ever!

he would sooo get whooped by the man himself, Chuck fuckin Norris
Hell yeah man, Chuck Norris would give you a lesson in whoopin ass!!


http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B000063WJV.03.LZZZZZZZ.jpg


^^ Tell me that shit won't strike fear in EVERY-FUCKIN-BODY!!!

[Hulud]

what the hell ever!

he would sooo get whooped by the man himself, Chuck fuckin Norris
if chuck norris is running late
time better slow the FUCK down

[JustinSane110™]

if chuck norris is running late
time better slow the FUCK down
:lmfao: :lmfao:

[thinkfast®]

Chuck fuckin Norris doesn't read man. He just stares the book down until he gets the info he wants..

[Hulud]

chick norris' tears cure cancer
too bad hes never cried

[JustinSane110™]

When Chuck Norris was denied a McGriddle at McDonalds because it was 10:35, He roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendys.

[DrivenMind]

So wait... what if an immovable object and an unstoppable force met at Chuck Noris?

edit: Below was taken on the way to Indiana, I did a Chuck Noris pose.

[thinkfast®]

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
He also has counted to infinity - twice.

[Hulud]

when chuck norris was born, with a full beard, the nurse said "holy shit! its fucking chuck norris" then proceeded to have sex with him. that was the third girl chuck had sex with

[thinkfast®]

When Chuck Norris was denied a McGriddle at McDonalds because it was 10:35, He roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendys.

LIRL!!

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

[JustinSane110™]

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

[Hulud]

So wait... what if an immovable object and an unstoppable force met at Chuck Noris?

edit: Below was taken on the way to Indiana, I did a Chuck Noris pose.
hardcore!

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

[thinkfast®]

As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

[JustinSane110™]

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

[thinkfast®]

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

[JustinSane110™]

Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.

[Hulud]

chuck norris doesnt tea bag girls, he potato sacks them

[Hulud]

if you can see chuck norris, he can see you. if you cant see chuk norris you may only be seconds away from death

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris

[DrivenMind]

lol...

"Chuck Noris doesn't sleep. He waits."

[thinkfast®]

you fuckin up the rotation Hulud.. thats 1 :slap:

[JustinSane110™]

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b365/JustinSane110/Stiller1.jpg

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".

[Hulud]

chuck norris is 1/8 cherokee. its not in his heritage, its because he ate a FUCKING cherokee indian

[thinkfast®]

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

[JustinSane110™]

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b365/JustinSane110/Stiller2.jpg

[thinkfast®]

People feel uncomfortable in Chuck Norris' presence, as he is simultaneously both a rock and a hard place.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could
chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU
RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat.
Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't
fuck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony
of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile
radius of the blast went deaf.

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris' buddy icon is a picture of Tony Danza fellating himself.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris' buddy icon is a picture of Tony Danza fellating himself.
:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:

Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".

[Hulud]

chuck norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparallelled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalised, chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. the devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. they now play poker every second wednesday of the month

[DrivenMind]

chuck norris is 1/8 cherokee. its not in his heritage, its because he ate a FUCKING cherokee indian

Edit: It's because he ate 1/8th of the entire Cherokee Indian population.

[Hulud]

chuck norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs

[thinkfast®]

The only thing stronger than kevlar are vests woven out of Chuck Norris' chest hair.

[Hulud]

chuck norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, chuck met all 3 bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement

[thinkfast®]

After he was stumped by a particularly tricky game of "Where's Waldo," Chuck Norris insemenated all of the female characters in the picture. Nine months later, he gathered all of his offspring and formed a renegade band of mercenaries, which he called "Chuck's Fucks." Norris still patrols the countryside with his offspring, searching for Waldo.

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris is what's eating Gilbert Grape.

[JustinSane110™]

At the end of each week, Chuck Norris murders a dozen white people just to prove he isn't a racist.

[Hulud]

To prove it isn't that big a deal to beat cancer, chuck norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer, only to rid them from his body by flexing his muscles for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong

[thinkfast®]

Steven Segal is Chuck Norris’ bitch. When Chuck Norris is hungry, he says, "Bitch, make me a sandwich." Steven Segal would then make a sandwich.

[Hulud]

There are no disabled people, only people who have angered chuck norris

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his Dad did.

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris shot down a german plane in world war two by pointing his finger at it and saying "bang"

[thinkfast®]

When Chuck Norris helps you jumpstart your car, remember: beard is positive, fist is negative.

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't pluck up the courage to tell him

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris has no concept of time, if you go to his house you won't find a single clock. When you ask to leave because it's getting late he stares at you blankly until you sit back down.

[JustinSane110™]

Vin Diesel is the son of Chuck Norris, Vin realised his awesomeness long before Chuck did. When Chuck found out about this he took it upon himself to roundhouse Vin Diesel's hair the fuck off and yell "Chuck Norris isn't having this shit!!" To this day Vin Diesel still is unable grow hair.

[Hulud]

after much debate, president truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending chuck norris. His reasoning? It was more humane

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris doesn't shave, he kicks himself in the face. the only thing that can cut chuck norris is chuck norris

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris' phone number, 768-634-6873, spells out the word "roundhouse.

[Hulud]

chuck norris frequently signs up for beginners karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the sh1t out of little kids

[Hulud]

the quickest way to a mans heart is with chuck norris's fist

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris can satisfy a whale.

[Hulud]

Chuck Norris can eat a Rubix Cube and shit it out fully solved.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris goes to the toilet once a month - no more, no less - if he needs to or not.

[Hulud]

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said "don't worry about it honey" and went into his backyard. He came back 5 minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said "Never question Chuck Norris".

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris saw the movie, "The Polar Express," and immediately roundhouse kicked his 6 year old son in the face for convincing him to see it.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris doesnt believe in Germany.

[thinkfast®]

Chuck Norris is the world's best actor. Or else.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris burned down an entire forest when he was experimenting with water.

[thinkfast®]

The only gold medal Chuck Norris hasn't won at the Olympics is in gymnastics because that is for fags.

[JustinSane110™]

Chuck Norris can believe its not butter.

[thinkfast®]

Last one and I'm out, LIRL

There is a little bit of Chuck Norris in each and every one of us. Mainly due to rape.

[JustinSane110™]

Same here man, I need some sleep. :goodjob:

Every piece of furniture in Chuck Norris house is a Total Gym.

[Hulud]

Im out as well
Chuck Norris once met God, the proceeded to roundhouse kick him. Saying Chuck Norris is God

[XBLG20]

even though it's a NIN song i just played the video Hurt with johnny cash and everytime i watch it i get chills...