So you got jokes, huh?

[SixSquared]

So a guy proposes to his girlfriend. She's happy, the family's happy, life is wonderful. But there is one snag in this.... the guy has had a crush on his new fiancee's sister for years. The sister knows, the guy knows, and he's pretty sure his future in laws know, as well. This is a problem. Well one day the guy stops in at his future in-laws house, only to find his fiancee's sister half naked and in a VERY flirtacious mood. She's coming on to him hard, and seemingly has no intent on stopping. He excuses himself for a moment and walks outside, heading towards his car. Outside, his future family and future wife are waiting for him. His fiancee's father gives him a big hug and says "son, I'm proud of you for not going after my other daughter... and I'm proud to have someone of that caliber in my family." He gets the same message from his future mother in law, and pretty much the whole family. But the whole time, only one thought is crossing his mind....


"Damn... glad I left the condoms in the glovebox"

------------------

A woman goes into the doctors' office complaining of a strange rash. The doctor takes a look, and she has an odd shaped ring on her chest. The doctor asks if she does anything that could be contributing to this rash. She thinks, and says "Well... my boyfriend went to Ohio State, and he ALWAYS wears his Ohio shirt... even when we're having sex!". The doctor thinks, and decides that the rash is a result of the embroidery on the sweatshirt. He giver her some cream to clear up the rash and sends her on her way.

A few days go by, and another girl shows up, with a similiar rash, except this one is almost shaped like a G. The doc says "I think I know what's going on, but is there anything you can think of that would have caused this?" and the girl says "well... my boyfriend goes to UGA [GO DAWGS!] and he ALWAYS wears his sweatshirt.. even when we're having sex!". So the doctor laughs and gives her some cream and sends her on her way.

The very next day, a girl shows up with yet another rash. This one is shaped like an M. The doctor laughs and says "Let me guess... your boyfeiend went to... Michigan?" and the girl laughs and replies...

"No... my girlfriend went to Wyoming... why do you ask?"

[Nitro]

1st one's a repost.............but the 2nd 1 is funny as shit

[Frög]

hahah!

[nx2000det]

A husband and his blonde wife were driving along the country side one Sunday just putt puttin along.... as they were driving, the blonde saw another blonde out in an open field rowing a boat. Out of sheer and utter shock she screamed to her husband "Stop.. stop this car right now!". The blonde jumped out of the car and ran over to the fence.
She screamed at the top of her lungs " It's dumb ass blondes like you that give us such a bad name.... if I could swim I would come out there and whip your ass!"