good way to not accept an apology

[2.0civic]

i was going to post this in RLD but wanted more answers lol or maybe just to see if someone disputes it.

New years eve, some shit happened between me and a good friend. Without really going into detail on what happened, she apoligized to me today and i didnt accept it. I replies with "sorry is when you fuck up not meaning to but when you VOLUNTARILY fucked up, sorry really doesnt help the situation"

I feel bad now for saying that but due to the situation and the fact that right now i CANNOT accept an apology, i said that.

My question is do other poeple think the same way about apologies?? like i really dont think people should apoligize for shit if they dont mean it or if its a situation that they put themselves in.

Any feedback is appreciated

[R.Kelly]

yea people shouldnt apologize for something if they don't mean it or they're just apologizing to move on

[LiL PaKi]

they put themselves in that situation then later realize how bad they fucked up and now they are sorry, so they apologize.. the apology should be accepted if u are forgiving...

[LiL PaKi]

yea people shouldnt apologize for something if the don't mean it or they're just apologizing to move on

:goodjob:

[2.0civic]

aisha the only thing is like i Honestly dont think shes sorry but just trying to save face. we were supposed to go to waffle house this morning and i was still so fucked up and mad that i just went home instead

[IndianStig]

what happened? then it would be easier for us to give feedback.

im to soft, i always accept apologies.

[JustinSane110™]

i was going to post this in RLD but wanted more answers lol or maybe just to see if someone disputes it.

New years eve, some shit happened between me and a good friend. Without really going into detail on what happened, she apoligized to me today and i didnt accept it. I replies with "sorry is when you fuck up not meaning to but when you VOLUNTARILY fucked up, sorry really doesnt help the situation"

I feel bad now for saying that but due to the situation and the fact that right now i CANNOT accept an apology, i said that.

My question is do other poeple think the same way about apologies?? like i really dont think people should apoligize for shit if they dont mean it or if its a situation that they put themselves in.

Any feedback is appreciatedYou did the right thing IMO, keyword there is "voluntarily", she knew what she was doing.

[Kyle]

It would be easier to discuss if I knew what happened.

[SKUNK2GUY]

you should have made her pay for waffle house

[VegetaRules]

I'm with ya B18 with that non-apology-taking shyt, ESPECIALLY with women. It would help more if we actually knew, but just a normal assumption, show no mercy.lol

Oh now you forgive her on a whole as a human, because that's no good to you spiritually. We all make mistakes, so forgive, & don't hold a grudge, just keep her at a distance on that level.....Vegeta

[2.0civic]

long story short, a female that ive been talking to off and on for about 5 years now, we were at a party together. well her friends invited me cause she didnt have a date so i was like sure (even though i had other plans with another female). so i get over there and start drinking and this other guy is all over here all night. I keep my cool and im like whatever at the end of the night, itll be mine lol. I dunno, about 12:15 new years rolls around and i get up to check my email for order status of some phones for my company, get a phonecall and leave the computer room, and the guy (he has a girlfriend who is conveintently said girls good friend) and they are making out on the couch. I was like "fuck". So i go finish my call and come back and they didnt realize i saw them. Then i was like "fuck it, im going upstairs to go and sleep". I get upstairs and her friends that invited me are like "im sorry we didnt see that coming at all. I dont know why they are hanging all over each other tonight" so i was like "shit go look at them now downstairs."

To make things worse, we get up new years day and were supposed to go to waffle house. i get up and hey are STILL all fucking over each other. so i get my keys out of my friends car and just fucking dip out as we were all on the way to WaHo. I realized on the way home i forgot my gate key to my complex and just went and rode around. I go back about 2 hours later to get my gate key and the girl didnt say shit to me.

Last night i was talking to her friends about the whole situation and they are more pissed about it than me lol. anyway, she tryed apoligizing last night and i couldnt phrase it and say what i wanted to so i was just like " sorry is when you do something unintentional and fuck up. It doesnt really apply to a situation where YOU put yourself in that position."

Theres ALOT of history between me and this girl and i felt bad for saying that but fuck, i also had two other girls wanting to hang out saturday and a party invite in kennesaw and i turned it down to go see her and got too drunk to leave

[LiL PaKi]

was she drunk?

[2.0civic]

i was the drunkest onethere and i was the one mixing drinks lol. i had probably close to 20 or so drinks all night between shots and everything...she had like mmm, maybe (not including jello shots cause those are weak) 4-5 drinks? she had gotten there at 6 to help set up, i got there at 845 and was on my fourth drink before she finished her first. Ive seen her alot drunker and she was able to comprehend shit then...she may have been tipsy but she wasnt tore up by any means

[2.0civic]

still though, drunk or not, had i known douchebag was going to be there, i wouldnt have gone but it would have worked two ways. first is me not go, her not have a date, me feel like shit or Go, not with who i actually really wanted to take and start drama, and hook up with her, i get there, get too drunk to leave and then all that shit happened.

Great fucking new year 30 minutes into it

[VegetaRules]

Okay, now after reading that.....SHOW NO MERCY!! LOL Because dating off & on, or whatever should command more respect period. My best advice is to keep ex's, ex's! There's a reason why they are ex's. If you accept this apology, & try to rekindle/date you are asking for this to happen again.

In Georgia women outnumber men 5-to-1, when you think about shyt, remember 5-to-1!! lol You did handle yourself well tho. Think of it this way, God gives you signs on everything you do, consider this a loud sign to leave it alone.:goodjob: ....Vegeta

[2.0civic]

Okay, now after reading that.....SHOW NO MERCY!! LOL Because dating off & on, or whatever should command more respect period. My best advice is to keep ex's, ex's! There's a reason why they are ex's. If you accept this apology, & try to rekindle/date you are asking for this to happen again.

In Georgia women outnumber men 5-to-1, when you think about shyt, remember 5-to-1!! lol You did handle yourself well tho. Think of it this way, God gives you signs on everything you do, consider this a loud sign to leave it alone.:goodjob: ....Vegetathats what i keep trying to tell myself too but me and her have never been boyfriend and girlfriend. a few weeks ago and hell even last week, shit got said about us exploring that option so ive put this other girl on the side for now and tried to talk to her. last week she came over to my place and ate then we went to go see a friend out in snellville. on the way back, she dropped me off at my place and then started crying so i was just like W/e she is probably just confused and doesnt know what she wants.

fuck it, after the other night, i dont care and it just bothers me that she KNEW WTF she was doing. Like we have been at partys with each other before and to make things worse, we have an agreement(lol apparently one sided now) that we wouldnt hook up with other people at parties if we were both single or if one of us were single, the other wouldnt bring his/her friend with them and make the other feel bad

[LiL PaKi]

damn...

[2.0civic]

yeah, im off to work. ill be back on in 30 minutes or so

[Keebs ð¿ð]

Don't worry bro, my new years started off like shit too. Pretty much the exact same story happened to me. This girl I have been talking to pulled that EXACT same stunt, except it was the new years kiss/make out at midnight. She was all over this asshole. Pissed me off so bad, so I know exactly how you feel.

P.S. I see you Ran :ninja: Up for some GOW?

[srtowner]

Well it defiantly sounds like a fucked up situation but it's not like yall were dating or anything. Your rings not on her finger so she's free to screw whoever she pleases. But I do agree with you about the whole apology thing.

[2-tone]

apoligizing only works when you mean it, in this case I wouldnt accept... i guess

[ksinao]

pretty shitty man. i hate it when girls do that kind of shit and then try and make up for it.

[2.0civic]

yeah i dunno. on the other hand, i have been thinking bout fucking one of her friends...aint even gonna lie

keebs, Whats GOW?

[Friggintitsman]

yeah i dunno. on the other hand, i have been thinking bout fucking one of her friends...aint even gonna lie

keebs, Whats GOW?

Go for it

[Keebs ð¿ð]

yeah i dunno. on the other hand, i have been thinking bout fucking one of her friends...aint even gonna lie

keebs, Whats GOW?

Gears of War, on the Xbox 360 :P

[thepolecat]

sometimes sorry just wont cut it, so get with her sister or best friend

[Sack Attack]

i dont belive is saying sorry....if i piss someone off such as a friend, i will not say im sorry, i will just act like it never happened and when they do to, it makes eeryone feel more comfortable....just like it never happened, sorry is just an easy way out of everything, everyone acts like its a powerful word and its not.....

like if someone calls my girl a slut bitch or something, who fuckin cares, its just a word...same as all the other words to me

[StupidBikerBoy]

If you 2 have that much of a past, you will forgive her eventually. I wouldn't forget this though, no matter what happens in the future. There is a lesson to be learned here in your situation. It may be a sign that you 2 have shitty communication, or that she just shouldn't be relied upon. Thats for you to figure out.

But I think you handled it good. If it was me, it would have been similar. But at this point I would probably be givin her the cold shoulder for awhile. Letting her sweat it out and know that you wont have this shit. Oh yeah, I'd be playin a little more now also, just to show that I can.:goodjob:

[2.0civic]

If you 2 have that much of a past, you will forgive her eventually. I wouldn't forget this though, no matter what happens in the future. There is a lesson to be learned here in your situation. It may be a sign that you 2 have shitty communication, or that she just shouldn't be relied upon. Thats for you to figure out.

But I think you handled it good. If it was me, it would have been similar. But at this point I would probably be givin her the cold shoulder for awhile. Letting her sweat it out and know that you wont have this shit. Oh yeah, I'd be playin a little more now also, just to show that I can.:goodjob:

yeah man..shes tried calling me the last two days and ive either sent her to voicemail or just answered and told her i was in meeting. She tried cathcing me on aim earlier and i put up my awaty message for a bit and came on and she was like "are you busy or just dont want to talk"

[Jaimecbr900]

Cold shoulder for a while for her.

Next time, don't be coy with her and either grab it and YOU do the making out or cut her loose and don't let it bother you when she makes out with someone else. I know there's history, but if you're intentions weren't clear, then you can't completely blame her. It just seemed that way from the story, so if there are other details I may stand corrected.

Either way, it wasn't a cool move on her part. She should be made to sweat it a little. Personally, I'd tell her (or yell at her depending on the mood) straight up I was PISSED OFF royally and why. If she gave me some half ass appology, I'd do as you did and tell her to go screw herself. If she gave me a real appology, I'd still let her sweat a little and then forgive her and let it go.

:2cents:

[2.0civic]

Cold shoulder for a while for her.

Next time, don't be coy with her and either grab it and YOU do the making out or cut her loose and don't let it bother you when she makes out with someone else. I know there's history, but if you're intentions weren't clear, then you can't completely blame her. It just seemed that way from the story, so if there are other details I may stand corrected.

Either way, it wasn't a cool move on her part. She should be made to sweat it a little. Personally, I'd tell her (or yell at her depending on the mood) straight up I was PISSED OFF royally and why. If she gave me some half ass appology, I'd do as you did and tell her to go screw herself. If she gave me a real appology, I'd still let her sweat a little and then forgive her and let it go.

:2cents:

Pretty much i was invited BY HER through her friends is how it went down which i guess is why im so pissed off lol

BTW, thanks for not writing a book in my thread lol:goodjob:

shortest post evar!

[2.0civic]

update on the whole situation.


her friend s called me again a few days ago while she was there wanting to hang out before heading back to school

well since i was still a little upset i sent her this.


wow, i really dont know what to say so im going to say this about the only way i know how. a few weeks ago i went trough my old messages and found this. I dont know what you wanted or if you even felt this same way but i thought i cared about you Which is why i tried to spend time with you while you were here and why i went to lizs party instead of going to kennesaw with robert or going to jennas house. The entire time i was there, You did nothing but hang all over matt. Thats the reason i went to kroger and the reason i took lizs car was cause i KNEW at that time that if i left by myself, i was going to another party. Looking back at the situation, i should have, When you asked me to go get you a drink then asked me to go get you pizza rolls, i was still cool cause i thought maybe you wanted to hang out possibly with me and then when i went to go get my drink and come back, matts all over you. I STILL dont say shit. Then you had the nerve to ask ME to get YOU a drink? Why didnt you ask your date since he was obviously the one you wanted to be with that night. So then i go inside to just try to get drunk and be by myself for a second. Then all i keep hearing people asking is if im mad. No, i wasnt mad, im still not mad. Im disapointed as fuck but im not mad. Then after midnight, i got to check my email and get tracking numbers for some phones i ordered for work, i go to take a phone call and what do i see?? Matt and you making out all on the couch. That was all i needed to see to make a decision about what i want or for that matter dont want and that is to be a fucking backup for whenever you want someone. Im tired of being the guy that you know you can call when nobody else wants to do anything cause you know i care about you. I didnt bring jenna or another girl ive been dating off and on cause i didnt want to start any drama. I should have just fucking left but thought MAYBE i could have a good time and it wasnt bad after i went upstairs and went to sleep and then i get up and then everyone wanted to go to waffle house. The reason i left is cause when we were at lizs, i couldnt leave cause i had alcohol in m system but i WAS NOT going to sit there and watch you and matt all over each other while i was eating so i left.So i hope school goes good for you and you find someone that cares for you like i thought maybe i did (which i was obviously wrong). I dont know what this means or how youre going to take this but i honestly do not care anymore. i would still like to remain friends but im still a littlefrustrated since i wasted my fucking new years listening to you two making out. Next time your in town, dont bother inviting me anywhere. you can come over if youd like but im not getting stranded somewhere again where i have to see that shit. ive been online alot and just havent felt like talking to you, you apoligized the other day for something but i really didnt care to hear a bullshit apologies.

i dont know what changed from below but its whatever. if you want to talk, you have my number and here and my email so whatever

bye




she responds with:

look i really am sry and i didnt mean for anything to happen between me and matt and when i wrote that i really did have feelings for u and i rally do care about u . i really didnt mean for any of that stuff to happen on new years i was drunk and i know that isnt a good reason for anything but once again im sry

[Humphrizzle]

no good.

she lies..

[gokblok]

no good.

she lies..

yeah...i called her out on her drunkeness after 3 drinks too and toild her she knew what she was doing and she didnt respond back...took me ALOT to do that to since we been talking off and on so long but shit, i geuss its easier to cut ties now then later

[gokblok]

shit my bad, didnt realize i was under my buddys name

lol its b18hatch

[Crazy Asian]

Fuck it b18 you got other girls. Fuck the bitch.

[Humphrizzle]

i had a girl like that.. few months ago.. but i got over it and now i dont talk to her very much.. and i am not attracted to her anymore because she gained weight.

[gokblok]

yeah true true..


shit i guess theres a reason shit happens

[Crazy Asian]

A girl got pissed of at me because I was smoking. WTF IF YOU DONT LIKE IT THEN WHY YOU STILL HANGING AROUND ME THEN!!!

[gokblok]

lol man i gotta figure out why the fuck adam has a guy riding a penis in his avatar

[Humphrizzle]

i dont smoke.. i smoke cigs.. but stoners and stupid people piss me off.. so im not smoking like them.

i drink a lot.

i dont really become interested in girls that are whores about me drinking or smoking cigs. unless they are amazingly hott

[SpeedMonkey]

fortunately...


i found a girl that gets high with me every now and then.. and does not mind my coffee/marlboro addiction. its heaven

[2.0civic]

v[]onkey']fortunately...


i found a girl that gets high with me every now and then.. and does not mind my coffee/marlboro addiction. its heaven

shjit thats few and far in between....funniest part is that this girl was bitching about me to not get tore up at parties and LOL at how the situation turned out with the "I was drunk" excuse...

[gokblok]

Fuck that dumb ho

[1gDSM]

cut your losses man

she knew you where there and she knew you would plainly be able to see what was going on
yet she still made the decision to do it. . . .

[2.0civic]

yeah and theres also more shit that got sent today cause she wont fucking answer when i call to actually talk to her about it

[1gDSM]

thats shitty bro

[ksinao]

is b18 gonna have to slap a ho?

[2.0civic]

nah, after the shit she said tonight, im just not talking to her anymore...

she tried to defend her actions with "i was drunk" then retracted that then went back to it.

I told her she needed to re-evaluate her decision to drink at parties if it always results in her poor judgment of doing things she doesnt want so fuck it, im over it. She keeps asking me to forgive her and im like, "its a bullshit apology! you arent fucking sorry, just sorry you got caught!"

[ksinao]

at least you finally got in touch with her and got some closure on the issue. tough luck man.

[2.0civic]

yeah fuck it though...lol like i said earlier, im just going to keep fucking here friends...been through 5 of her circle already lol

[Jaimecbr900]

Judging by her response it doesn't seem to phase her too much.

Personally, I'd cut her loose and call it a day.

What you should do now is use it to your advantage. Don't over do your good-bye. Be a gentleman about it and just basically tell her, preferably within ear shot of all her available single and good looking friends, that she simply hurt your feelings and treated you badly and you're simply not going to take that.....have a happy life.....and see ya.

I promise you that you will reap much more "rewards" that way. It's over between you and her, as well it should be IMO. So don't waste this opportunity to use it to your favor. She didn't hesitate to step on you. Now, take that situation to get to your next level.

Girls like to see assertive and stand-up kind of guys. You can kill two with one stone if you play your cards right. ;)

[2.0civic]

Judging by her response it doesn't seem to phase her too much.

Personally, I'd cut her loose and call it a day.

What you should do now is use it to your advantage. Don't over do your good-bye. Be a gentleman about it and just basically tell her, preferably within ear shot of all her available single and good looking friends, that she simply hurt your feelings and treated you badly and you're simply not going to take that.....have a happy life.....and see ya.

I promise you that you will reap much more "rewards" that way. It's over between you and her, as well it should be IMO. So don't waste this opportunity to use it to your favor. She didn't hesitate to step on you. Now, take that situation to get to your next level.

Girls like to see assertive and stand-up kind of guys. You can kill two with one stone if you play your cards right. ;)

LOL this is correct and two of her best friends live within walking distance too. HMM...:idb:

[ksinao]

LOL this is correct and two of her best friends live within walking distance too. HMM...:idb:

now lets just hope they're secretly not on IA

[2.0civic]

now lets just hope they're secretly not on IA

they arent:goodjob:

[DARLING DARA]

appologies are for people who actually own up to their wrong doings, and taking full responsibilty for their actions whatever it may be.

that's what an appology is -- not just knowing that you fucked up, and still putting blame on.. outside factors...

[2.0civic]

appologies are for people who actually own up to their wrong doings, and taking full responsibilty for their actions whatever it may be.

that's what an appology is -- not just knowing that you fucked up, and still putting blame on.. outside factors...

VERY true:goodjob:

[Nemesis]

You kids wouldnt know a true sorry if it slapped ya in the faces!