speedminded
05-26-2005, 08:11 PM
ok, stole this off another site, at first you're gonna think this is strange, really strange, but the thread does have potential. Here are a few examples...
"My penis is like the Hummer H2: it's massive, imposing, and inefficient. Despite its fearsome appearance, it falls apart when it sees any serious use, and is mostly used by soccer moms."
"My penis is like an austin mini. Small but women say its cute and it was the basis of many motion pictures."
"My balls are like a pimped out '64 Impala: Huge and touch the ground. And Gangstas love them."
"My penis is like a Morris Minor, you have to start it by hand and jump on when it get's going."
"My vagina is like a Mini Cooper. Small and stylish. Hard to get in, but once you're riding, you have the time of your life. Or maybe it's like a paddy wagon. COS I'M JAILBAIT."
"My penis is like a 2005 Chrystler 300C wrapped around a tree. Stocky, luxourous but bent unnaturally to the left."
"My penis is a Volkswagon Beetle, for a period of time it was incredibly popular and everyone wanted to ride it. Now it's not cool anymore and most people just make jokes about it."
"My penis is like a mail truck. It always comes once a day and people get excited when it shows up at their house."
"My penis is like a purple 2002 Chevrolet Cavalier. For some unknown reason, only fat chicks find it appealing."
"My vagina is like the '32 Ford street rod my boyfriend's building. Although he cherishes it and is overly protective of it (he freaks out if anyone touches it, including me), it only gets driven on special occassions. But being made with fresh, young materials, its starts reliably every time and will get you where ever you want to go a heck of alot quicker than if you tried getting there yourself."
"My vagina is kind of like my 2005 Hyndai Accent. It gets driven fairly often but still has low miles. Small enough that one person can fit comfortably, but upon adding a second you have noticibly less room. Technically there is a backseat, but nobody's ever ridden back there. Probably for the best anyway, as shoe-horning would be required."
"I don't know what kind of car my penis is like, but someone did once write 'wash me' in the dirt on the side of it."
"My cock is like an '89 Camry. Leave it unlocked and out in the open too long and it's bound to get jacked."
"My penis is like an El Dorado with shitty hydraulics. Long and leaning to the left."
"My vagina is like a Kia Sorento - it tends to bottom out."
"My penis is like Biff's car from Back To The Future - only I know how to get it started right, and when I'm older I plan to travel back in time and ride it. And it's been covered in manure twice when rear-ending another vehicle."
"My penis is like my 2000 Audi S4 - Nobody pays attention to it until I decide to lay down the wood. And then everybody is like "Where the fuck did THAT come from?" It also uses 4 19 inch rubbers at once."
"My penis is like the A-Team van, men like to ride it, usually in groups."
"My penis is like an ambulance, large and white, plus it only really gets going when someone loses conciousness."
"My vagina is like a sleek cruise liner: beautiful, always a fun party, and frequently found in exotic parts of the globe, but nobody wants to ride it for more than a couple weeks."
"My penis is like an SUV. It has the occasional trouble staying upright."
"My wang's like my bike. When I fell asleep at the park, a burly homeless man used it without my consent."
"My penis is like the Hummer H2: it's massive, imposing, and inefficient. Despite its fearsome appearance, it falls apart when it sees any serious use, and is mostly used by soccer moms."
"My penis is like an austin mini. Small but women say its cute and it was the basis of many motion pictures."
"My balls are like a pimped out '64 Impala: Huge and touch the ground. And Gangstas love them."
"My penis is like a Morris Minor, you have to start it by hand and jump on when it get's going."
"My vagina is like a Mini Cooper. Small and stylish. Hard to get in, but once you're riding, you have the time of your life. Or maybe it's like a paddy wagon. COS I'M JAILBAIT."
"My penis is like a 2005 Chrystler 300C wrapped around a tree. Stocky, luxourous but bent unnaturally to the left."
"My penis is a Volkswagon Beetle, for a period of time it was incredibly popular and everyone wanted to ride it. Now it's not cool anymore and most people just make jokes about it."
"My penis is like a mail truck. It always comes once a day and people get excited when it shows up at their house."
"My penis is like a purple 2002 Chevrolet Cavalier. For some unknown reason, only fat chicks find it appealing."
"My vagina is like the '32 Ford street rod my boyfriend's building. Although he cherishes it and is overly protective of it (he freaks out if anyone touches it, including me), it only gets driven on special occassions. But being made with fresh, young materials, its starts reliably every time and will get you where ever you want to go a heck of alot quicker than if you tried getting there yourself."
"My vagina is kind of like my 2005 Hyndai Accent. It gets driven fairly often but still has low miles. Small enough that one person can fit comfortably, but upon adding a second you have noticibly less room. Technically there is a backseat, but nobody's ever ridden back there. Probably for the best anyway, as shoe-horning would be required."
"I don't know what kind of car my penis is like, but someone did once write 'wash me' in the dirt on the side of it."
"My cock is like an '89 Camry. Leave it unlocked and out in the open too long and it's bound to get jacked."
"My penis is like an El Dorado with shitty hydraulics. Long and leaning to the left."
"My vagina is like a Kia Sorento - it tends to bottom out."
"My penis is like Biff's car from Back To The Future - only I know how to get it started right, and when I'm older I plan to travel back in time and ride it. And it's been covered in manure twice when rear-ending another vehicle."
"My penis is like my 2000 Audi S4 - Nobody pays attention to it until I decide to lay down the wood. And then everybody is like "Where the fuck did THAT come from?" It also uses 4 19 inch rubbers at once."
"My penis is like the A-Team van, men like to ride it, usually in groups."
"My penis is like an ambulance, large and white, plus it only really gets going when someone loses conciousness."
"My vagina is like a sleek cruise liner: beautiful, always a fun party, and frequently found in exotic parts of the globe, but nobody wants to ride it for more than a couple weeks."
"My penis is like an SUV. It has the occasional trouble staying upright."
"My wang's like my bike. When I fell asleep at the park, a burly homeless man used it without my consent."