Rant / Just gotta let it out................

[Rican219]

OK alot of people know me and those that know me well know that I am a great father!
So I just had my 1 year anniversary of my Divorce and I DON'T Hate my ex. Don't get me wrong I was hurt at the things that were said and done in our Marriage. With have a great relationship because we have a child together we are civil get along ect ect.
My son comes first!! Always has when it is my weekend I devote my time in that weekend to him and only him! Ask Alex ask anyone else I don't go out I don't do SHIT unless it is with him..........

So My Ex calls and says we have to talk........... OK thats fine so I go last night to her house and we sit down and talk and I can't say I was completely blindsided but this is what was said.

"I'm getting re-married to this guy I grew up with" Ok great.... "Well he is in the army and we are going to live in Baltimore......................................... ........ WTF?!!

Why me?! WTF did I do? I'm not DEAD Beat dad, I pay my child support, Spending all the time I could with my son and BAM now this........... I'm at a loss for words and don't know what in the fuck to do! WTF Why me?

I don't hate her but I'm very hurt and angry............

Who has been through this and how do you get through it? How should visitations work? I don't guess I have much of a choice in this matter..............

Sorry had to get that off my chest

[PhAtBoYMr2]

damn homie, sorry to hear that shit...everything will be alright man, keep your head up things will get better...

[Vteckidd]

that really sucks man, but unfortunetly our court system sides with the mother.

I applaud you with being a RESPONSIBLE parent, showing your kid love an being a great rolemodel. Sucks this has to happen

[ProjectWidow]

Dude Im sorry man!! That really sucks and I don't know what to say.

Hopefully you can maybe work somethings out still.

[Hulud]

damn dude im sorry, this is where the court system falls short, when the father is not a dead beat

[BTLFED]

Aw man! That shit is terrible! I know how much you love your little guy, and I know that you are a good man and father. I hope it works out for you. If you need anything holla.

[BABY J]

I have a daughter, she will be 2 on 01 June --> www.seriouscustoms.com/KAYLI (http://www.seriouscustoms.com/KAYLI) and her mom lives close. However she will be moving away too. You just have to HONESTLY look at the situation you are in and accept it. The second you 2 got divorced that meant that your son would have some tough lessons to learn. Even if you lived right next door to the ex, you would still "miss out" on 50% of his life (theoretically). You have to accept that Bro. Like Mike said the "law" sides with the woman, and whether you are a good dad or a bad dad the custodial parent gets all of the joy. I am not sure why there is a CS order on you... who needs the court to tell you something that you 2 could have came up with on your own? At the end of the day, you both will have to make the best effort, and she should not be running to court to handle EVERYTHING that yall do concerning him. COMMUNICATION and coming up with a plan TOGETHER that you both STICK to should work just fine rather than some judge who knows nothing about either of you in your personal life. But if all else fails, ask for your son in the summers when he is out of school.

[MongolPup]

damn dude that really sucks.....good luck with everything.

[carrascopa]

i already heard about this situation man.. i dont know what to say.. If angie can be civil about it it may not be that bad dude.. but than u have to think of the kid

some parents with joint parental rights will split the schoool yrs vacations and holidays right down the middle.. but thats tough on a kid...

my ex-step dad has my sisters in the summer and during winter breaks as well as flies them up to see him once a month..... its not an ideal situation either way but it will work out homie!

or just off the bitch she has it coming to her ne ways man

[CopyRight]

work things out like, you get him on every break from school and every other summer. Baltimore is too far to just fly the kid back for the weekend, and he'll end up hating it.

It really does suck man, but if your ex is cool, then there should be no problems on working something out.

btw, how long has she been dating this military guy?

[~The_Duke~]

I might be going through a similar situation here. We are supposed to be signing the papers this week.

I am sorry to hear that. Good luck to ya.

[Rican219]

Not to sure really I know they grew up together so they have known each other for a while.....
I have met the guy and I think he is cool and would be great with my son and shit but you know IT'S NOT ME! I'm his daddy! I cannot and will not be replaced! I don't know man my mind is so FUCKED up right now.

[carrascopa]

yo man .. im sorry bro i know you love the little guy man.. i fyou need anything letme know im here for ya homie

[quickdodge®]

Check your PM's, homeboy. I got something for you. Later, QD.

[Rican219]

Check your PM's, homeboy. I got something for you. Later, QD.
Good looking out bro

[JustinSane110™]

Damn homey, sorry to hear that. It'll all work out for you man, since from the sound of it that you and the ex are being civil about things.

[The Yousef]

i'm sorry dude...everything will hopefully work out in the end...everything happens for a reason...

[Ex_Vtec_Girl]

Awwww Jose, I'm sorry!!! You know if you want to go out & have a drink or just talk, Becca & I would be more than happy to take you out! :) I hope everything works out alright for you!

[Brett]

Hey man I am on the other end of that spectrum with me coming into a relationship with leisa and she has 2 kids, So I am in the shoes of the guy you are talking about. You ever need to talk man hit me up. But I will never try and replace Leisa's kids father, I just see me as a 2nd father who like him has thier best interest in mind and thats all that matters ya know?

[SE-Romeo]

Damn man that sucks, I cant relate at all but man, I couldnt even imagine that happening. I had a girl that took my kids life before its time, I had no say in it and it took me a bit to deal wtih it. Like Yousef says, everything happens for a reason. I realized the reason for mine, I'm sure you will yours too.

[Rican219]

Awwww Jose, I'm sorry!!! You know if you want to go out & have a drink or just talk, Becca & I would be more than happy to take you out! :) I hope everything works out alright for you!

Let me get through this week and that sounds good.:goodjob:

[Ex_Vtec_Girl]

OK, just give me a call! I'll be out of town until Monday night but we can figure something out after that :D

[Rican219]

OK, just give me a call! I'll be out of town until Monday night but we can figure something out after that :D

OK

[Leisa]

Jose,

Yep I have been there done that... back in 99 my ex had met a girl online who lived in Hagerstown MD.. he went up to meet her, they hit it off and continued to pursue a long distance relationship, well after a short time, she persuaded him to move up there after school ended... we that changed real quick because one day in Feb he just came to me and said "instead of waiting to move in june, Im moving up this weekend" I was like :eek: :eek: :eek: wtf??? the kicker is he told them he was moving, but didnt inform them he was moving out of state ( 750 miles away) so once he got there and got settled thats when he informed them... (what a bastard).. I dont get along well with my ex... or his bitch of a wife... so you are lucky in that aspect of the situation... you will now have to purchase airfare, hotel etc when you want to visit him... which sucks I know... it can get costly... good luck with it... you will need lots of patience :)

[civic95]

Tell her she has to pay for half of his plane tickets, and that you still want the the same visitations. Otherwise that joker needs to move here if he loves her.

[babygurl]

Not to sure really I know they grew up together so they have known each other for a while.....
I have met the guy and I think he is cool and would be great with my son and shit but you know IT'S NOT ME! I'm his daddy! I cannot and will not be replaced! I don't know man my mind is so FUCKED up right now.

(Forgive me for being blunt)
I dont know you that well, but the only way you would be replaced as his father if you let that happen. BUT from this post I can tell that will never happen. My father was never replaced by my step dad. And never will be. You can still have a good relationship with your son, it will just involve alot of travel!

[Rican219]

(Forgive me for being blunt)
I dont know you that well, but the only way you would be replaced as his father if you let that happen. BUT from this post I can tell that will never happen. My father was never replaced by my step dad. And never will be. You can still have a good relationship with your son, it will just involve alot of travel!
Well maybe your right he will not replace me I won't let it happen this is just very difficult to think about him being so far. Before I could call her up at anytime and pick him up or if she had a date she would leave him with me but all of that is going to chang and that is the hard thing to deal with.

Thanx IA family

[babygurl]

Well maybe your right he will not replace me I won't let it happen this is just very difficult to think about him being so far. Before I could call her up at anytime and pick him up or if she had a date she would leave him with me but all of that is going to chang and that is the hard thing to deal with.

Thanx IA family


I am so sorry sweetie...I wasnt trying to be a bitch with the other statement...so forgive me if it came that way....

But you seem like a very good man....and you still can see your son...anytime you want. I know that is far fetched...but you can still have a great relationship with your son. I know you are hurt. But things to happen for a reason.....YOu can come out of this on top!

[Rican219]

I am so sorry sweetie...I wasnt trying to be a bitch with the other statement...so forgive me if it came that way....

But you seem like a very good man....and you still can see your son...anytime you want. I know that is far fetched...but you can still have a great relationship with your son. I know you are hurt. But things to happen for a reason.....YOu can come out of this on top!

No NO I didn't take it as you were being a bitch I ubderstand what you meant. It's kewl :D I will come out on top but just gotta get there first.

[babygurl]

No NO I didn't take it as you were being a bitch I ubderstand what you meant. It's kewl :D I will come out on top but just gotta get there first.


Ok just making sure....If you can still be #1 in his life...But I can tell you this...if this soon to be step dad is a good person, your son will have a great life. I know for me my step dad and my father both played very important rolls..But my step dad will never replace my dad :)

[Leisa]

Not to sure really I know they grew up together so they have known each other for a while.....
I have met the guy and I think he is cool and would be great with my son and shit but you know IT'S NOT ME! I'm his daddy! I cannot and will not be replaced! I don't know man my mind is so FUCKED up right now.

Also,


you may want to get a mediator and have your divorce decree modified if this move actually happens... just my .02 cents

[BABY J]

Tell her she has to pay for half of his plane tickets, and that you still want the the same visitations. Otherwise that joker needs to move here if he loves her.

He can't, he is Army so she will have to follow him. And when he gets orders to move, she will follow too... for example, he goes to work one day and has orders to Germany... then off the family goes to Germany. THAT is when it will be hard... you can do DC EASILY compared to being overseas.