babygurl
06-13-2011, 07:35 AM
A woman needs only four animals in her life: a mink on her back, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass to pay for it all.
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An airplane pilot got engaged to two very pretty women at the same time. One
was named Edith; the other named Kate. They met, discovered they had the same
fiancee, and told him: "Get out of our lives you rascal. We'll teach you that
you can't have your Kate and Edith, too."
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A recent study has found that most women are wearing the wrong bra size. The
nation's average bra size has also been steadily increasing from 34B to 36C, on
its way up to a 38C.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
A guy is outside in his front yard attempting to fly a kite with his son.
Every time the kite gets up in the air, it comes crashing down. After this goes
on for awhile, his wife sticks her head out the front door and yells, "You need
more tail."
The guy turns to his son and says, "Son, I never will understand women. I
just told her an hour ago I needed more tail, and she said to go fly a kite."
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Why do men name their penises?
Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their
decisions.
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I think it was in Britain where a billboard advertising a car read:
"If this car was a woman, she'd get pinched in the butt."
Underneath which a graffiti read:
"If this woman was a car, she'd run you over."
__________________________________________________ ___________________
__________________________________________________ ___________________
An airplane pilot got engaged to two very pretty women at the same time. One
was named Edith; the other named Kate. They met, discovered they had the same
fiancee, and told him: "Get out of our lives you rascal. We'll teach you that
you can't have your Kate and Edith, too."
__________________________________________________ ___________________
A recent study has found that most women are wearing the wrong bra size. The
nation's average bra size has also been steadily increasing from 34B to 36C, on
its way up to a 38C.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
A guy is outside in his front yard attempting to fly a kite with his son.
Every time the kite gets up in the air, it comes crashing down. After this goes
on for awhile, his wife sticks her head out the front door and yells, "You need
more tail."
The guy turns to his son and says, "Son, I never will understand women. I
just told her an hour ago I needed more tail, and she said to go fly a kite."
__________________________________________________ ___________________
Why do men name their penises?
Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their
decisions.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
I think it was in Britain where a billboard advertising a car read:
"If this car was a woman, she'd get pinched in the butt."
Underneath which a graffiti read:
"If this woman was a car, she'd run you over."
__________________________________________________ ___________________