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View Full Version : The speeding ticket....



©hris
11-16-2005, 12:27 PM
A police officer pulled a guy over for speeding.

Officer: May I see your drivers license?

Driver: I dont have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owners card for this vehicle?

Driver: Its not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: Thats right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owners card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: Theres a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir. Thats where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: Theres a BODY in the TRUNK???

Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

Driver: Sure. Here it is.

It was valid.

Captain: Whos car is this?

Driver: Its mine, officer. Heres the owner card.

The driver owned the car.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if theres a gun in it?

Driver: Yes, sir, but theres no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said theres a body in it.

Driver: No problem.

Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I dont understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didnt have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, Ill bet the lying son of a bitch told you I was speeding, too.

Jimmy B
11-16-2005, 12:29 PM
repost retard

Hulud
11-16-2005, 12:30 PM
REPOST FROM HELL!

Tiff-O-Bitties
11-16-2005, 12:30 PM
jimmy, be nice.

The Ren
11-16-2005, 12:31 PM
Wow I just posted this like.. 2 weeks ago

©hris
11-16-2005, 12:32 PM
well damn, sorry i dont read all the threads EVERYONE post.....EVERY DAY.......at ALL hours of the night :)

The Ren
11-16-2005, 12:33 PM
well damn, sorry i dont read all the threads EVERYONE post.....EVERY DAY.......at ALL hours of the night :)
Yes but if your ganna post something.. search for it before you post it asswipe..

©hris
11-16-2005, 12:41 PM
sorry i see that as a waste of my time..... or u can just not reply to the joke and let it die to save us both from wasting a breath

Jimmy B
11-16-2005, 01:12 PM
ok man,.. my bad.. i wasnt tryin to be mean.. jsut that it has been posted like 5 times..

my bad..

oh,.. and back up! heheh j/k

Brett
11-16-2005, 01:20 PM
sorry i see that as a waste of my time..... or u can just not reply to the joke and let it die to save us both from wasting a breath

Doesnt waste a breath to type

Mike Lowrey
11-16-2005, 02:31 PM
I see fuckin stupid people!


Make it go away!

Hulud
11-16-2005, 02:34 PM
Doesnt waste a breath to type
:werd:

quickdodge®
11-16-2005, 05:30 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v131/quickdodge/damnidiot.jpg

Later, QD.

Darling Nikki
11-16-2005, 06:42 PM
^HAHAHAHAHAHA

Buford®
11-16-2005, 07:40 PM
Major repost. Daggum.

AznTraitor
11-16-2005, 08:45 PM
man, this bitch cant catch a break no matter how hard he tries.

quickdodge®
11-16-2005, 10:43 PM
^^^ Lolol. I would give him some props for keeping on keeping on.......but I won't. Later, QD.

5thgcelica
11-16-2005, 10:45 PM
Doesnt waste a breath to type



unless you're a really really really really fat person. moving your fingers too fast might cause lack of breath.


lol

2mchbooty
11-16-2005, 10:48 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v131/quickdodge/damnidiot.jpg

Later, QD.
:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: