Doppelgänger
12-30-2009, 08:34 AM
...and am turning to King Asshole if you display incompetence toward simple traffic rules. Drivers who think that everyone else needs to yield to them as if their boss of the road or that their schedule is more important are on my shit list too. Now, I don't go out of my way to display my feelings toward these people, but I now take every opportunity they give me to show my distain toward them. I swear my next step is going to be obtaining one of those giant spot lights that runs off a 12v motorcycle battery and has high and low beams, add a HID bulb/ballast to it and show some assholes what real bright lights look like.
B!tch3s driving with highbeams on - 0
Me - 2
So in the pask week I've started my assault on stupid people. Frankly, I've become quite jaded with people when driving in/around Atlanta. Put one wheel in my lane near me, I'll honk the shit out of you. Sit at a green light for more than 2 seconds, I'll lay on that horn. Change lanes without a signal within 1 car length, you get the high beams. Attempt to enter my turn lane from the moving lane because you're too lazy to go down the road and make a u-turn...you're going to f-king die.
Anyway.
So last night Jenn and I were coming up P'tree in Buckhead and this SUV (it's always some asshat in a SUV) is driving with their brights on. Now there is a cop behind us in traffic, so I can't go unusually slow and I can take off to get away from the moron. So I give them a MFR as they are driving next to me to welcome them to Atlanta and show them how happy I was at their stellar understanding of the various lights on their dashboard. Mind you, they were behind the APD officer at one point but the officer was too busy reading my tag to give a crap about the idiot blinding everyone. So we pull up to the light at Lenox...side by side. I look over at him and motion to roll the window down...
Me- Excuse me sir, is there a blue light illuminated in your gauge cluster?
Tourist- A blue light? *looks at gauges* Yeah.
Me- Well that light means your brights are on and you are blinding the shit out of everyone in front of you... including me.
Tourist- Well I'm sorry but why do you feel the need to give me the finger?
Me- I drive around Atlanta a lot and I assume everyone is stupid these days.
Tourist- Well I'm just passing through and that was rude.
Me- Well, my apologies but you were blinding me.
*light turns green*
My God that felt good. I mean, I did it in a very proper, monotone voice..to add to the smartassness. The only reason I "apologized" was because he was actually being nice in conversation and not acting like some dumb thug fuck. And to add to the story, last week some hoe...in a SUV...again, had been behind me for a bit with their brights on...right up on my ass at a red light. Some hoe too busy talking on the phone. So I rolled the window down and stuck my head out and yelled at them "to turn your fvckeng brights off"...and they did. The guy in the car next to me start laughing.
B!tch3s driving with highbeams on - 0
Me - 2
So in the pask week I've started my assault on stupid people. Frankly, I've become quite jaded with people when driving in/around Atlanta. Put one wheel in my lane near me, I'll honk the shit out of you. Sit at a green light for more than 2 seconds, I'll lay on that horn. Change lanes without a signal within 1 car length, you get the high beams. Attempt to enter my turn lane from the moving lane because you're too lazy to go down the road and make a u-turn...you're going to f-king die.
Anyway.
So last night Jenn and I were coming up P'tree in Buckhead and this SUV (it's always some asshat in a SUV) is driving with their brights on. Now there is a cop behind us in traffic, so I can't go unusually slow and I can take off to get away from the moron. So I give them a MFR as they are driving next to me to welcome them to Atlanta and show them how happy I was at their stellar understanding of the various lights on their dashboard. Mind you, they were behind the APD officer at one point but the officer was too busy reading my tag to give a crap about the idiot blinding everyone. So we pull up to the light at Lenox...side by side. I look over at him and motion to roll the window down...
Me- Excuse me sir, is there a blue light illuminated in your gauge cluster?
Tourist- A blue light? *looks at gauges* Yeah.
Me- Well that light means your brights are on and you are blinding the shit out of everyone in front of you... including me.
Tourist- Well I'm sorry but why do you feel the need to give me the finger?
Me- I drive around Atlanta a lot and I assume everyone is stupid these days.
Tourist- Well I'm just passing through and that was rude.
Me- Well, my apologies but you were blinding me.
*light turns green*
My God that felt good. I mean, I did it in a very proper, monotone voice..to add to the smartassness. The only reason I "apologized" was because he was actually being nice in conversation and not acting like some dumb thug fuck. And to add to the story, last week some hoe...in a SUV...again, had been behind me for a bit with their brights on...right up on my ass at a red light. Some hoe too busy talking on the phone. So I rolled the window down and stuck my head out and yelled at them "to turn your fvckeng brights off"...and they did. The guy in the car next to me start laughing.