I got farted on by a stripper....

[deathrex]

Had a few beers, got bored went to the strip club :boobies: with a buddy to go see some stripper friends of ours. 300lb black girl hopped on stage more like stampeeded but i felt bad for her since she only had 3 bucks on her garter, and me being the gentleman that i am was going to toss her a 5 so she didnt feel like a complete failure. It was sad a hot chick was on stage and she got up and everyone walked away. Always gotta make a lady feel good about her self even if shes not the most beautiful thing out there. Dosent mean shes getting any from me, ill admit it that looks do matter to me to an extent, i tend to date strippers cause there not fake what you see is what you get, there not faking who the are. But i do like women to feel like they matter or anything to help brighten up their day by any means. She farted in my eye.... Last time im ever nice to anyone. :no:

[scabtastic]

do i hear pink eye soon?

[thegovanator]

I hope you don't get pink eye now.

[FasTech]

More like stink eye.

[deathrex]

if i do im gunna be pissed as fuck.

[Firefightin_tC]

Nice Guys finish with stink eye.

[goi_ek]

lol

[Hondarider33]

aw man, pink eye's gonna suck, dont let fat ass strippers fart on you, its not good for business

[Lurker]

i tend to date strippers cause there not fake what you see is what you get, there not faking who the are.

:headslap: Someone slap some sense into this boy.

[Lurker]

On another note, she probably bet another coworker $100 she would fart in the face of the next person that tipped her.

Damn dude, you paid to get fart in your eye.

[-EnVus-]

should have punched in the one that stinks not the one that winks...
She was just blowing you a kiss lol

[Lurker]

^^^lol reps

[Lurker]

I'm in love with a stripper "fart", I'm in love with a strippeeeeeer.

[NickW]

Haha. +1 for telling everyone you paid for a stink eye

[Lurker]

Wait, wait, WAIT!
When a 300lbs ANYTHING farts, specs of feces normally fly with it at a high rate of speed. Are you sure she didn't shart in your eye? :lmfao:

You might have small molecules of fecal matter in your eye dude. I would pour straight rubbing alcohol in your eye, set it on fire, and repeat process 3 times a day until infection is gone.

[stephen]

when she pooted...did you smell it or feel it first????

[Subleg4]

That is absolutley disgusting!!

[bdydrpdmazda]

what did she say after the ordeal went down?


did you at least get a sorry or a my bad?



or did that bitch act like nothing happened

[01CDMLUDER]

Dude that might not of been a fart!!!

[Humphrizzle]

when she pooted...did you smell it or feel it first????

hahahahaha

[Total_Blender]

Thats what you get for going to the Clairmont. You know you liked it.

[quickdodge®]

i tend to date strippers cause there not fake what you see is what you get, there not faking who the are.

Hmmmm. So you go out with the bottom-feeders of the femalian species because they aren't fake? Or is it because they're easy if you got some money?

*** TODAY'S WORD: ***

Gullible. Later, QD.

[imperception]

Had a few beers, got bored went to the strip club :boobies: with a buddy to go see some stripper friends of ours. 300lb black girl hopped on stage more like stampeeded but i felt bad for her since she only had 3 bucks on her garter, and me being the gentleman that i am was going to toss her a 5 so she didnt feel like a complete failure. It was sad a hot chick was on stage and she got up and everyone walked away. Always gotta make a lady feel good about her self even if shes not the most beautiful thing out there. Dosent mean shes getting any from me, ill admit it that looks do matter to me to an extent, i tend to date strippers cause there not fake what you see is what you get, there not faking who the are. But i do like women to feel like they matter or anything to help brighten up their day by any means. She farted in my eye.... Last time im ever nice to anyone. :no:
funny story mate, but do you really believe that strippers aren't fake eh? I have dated a few, and not one of them has been as you say "not fake, what you see is what you get". I mean that from both a personality standpoint and a moral standpoint. It's their JOB to be fake to get your money, to me, it's about as fake as it gets. Not to mention the issues that comes with them, it, and dating them.

Good luck with this, but try and stay out of the line of fire lol. :cheers:

[deathrex]

Lol I felt it. Like a little poof in my left eye. No pink eye yet. I just dropped the 5 and walked away. every one that I have dated were the coolest chicks ever. What I mean about not being fake is personality wise they tell you straight up what's up. They don't sit there and say one thing while meaning another. And as far as their job to be fake I don't see it as much because Im friends with a few strippers and they act the same as if were all just hanging out. And yes easiness is a plus lol. But cash no, I make my own money. I'm a firm believer that men should be providers, Or atleast be able to provide if needed since more and more men are starting to stay home with the kids while women go to work. What ever my woman makes is hers to spend on whatever shed like.

[quickdodge®]

But cash no, I make my own money.

Thus proving my point. Later, QD.

[deathrex]

^ don't see the point being made considering I said the money they make is theirs and I make my own money. Nor did I state that their easy if I have money.

[quickdodge®]

Nor did I state that their easy if I have money.

Think how you wish, "player." Later, QD.

[bonezMTA]

STINK EYE!! lol i dont think its worse than having a girls period on your pants lol (superbad, great movie)

[thegovanator]

^ It's Merlot.
http://www.deep-focus.com/dfweblog/images/480_superbad.jpg

[D3UC3S]

gross dude...if its your hard earned money, why you just giving it to them...layin down 5s and shit??? At that point, friend or not, they hustled your money by getting nekkkid. bottom line.

strippers not fake...lol

[deathrex]

Think how you wish, "player." Later, QD.

Their easy money or not lol. I think that's how I should have put
it.

[deathrex]

gross dude...if its your hard earned money, why you just giving it to them...layin down 5s and shit??? At that point, friend or not, they hustled your money by getting nekkkid. bottom line.

strippers not fake...lol

Moneys easy made easy lost, I'm not sweating over it. Might as well have a good time. And as far as the friends that work there it's free, but I throw them a few anyways, always refuse it but I'll always get a way to give it to them. And like I said these are friends that are strippers, as far as it goes there not fake with me. Maybe to others but I also hang out with them outside of the club and they act just the same.

[amandDA]

this thread is hilarious!

[quickdodge®]

Their easy money or not lol. I think that's how I should have put
it.

If a girl sinks low enough to be a stripper, she only wants money. Stripping is a hustle. Hustling is a 24 hour/day job. There is nothing real about a stripper. There is no such thing as a self-respecting stripper. Later, QD.

[Black Mamba]

If a girl sinks low enough to be a stripper, she only wants money. Stripping is a hustle. Hustling is a 24 hour/day job. There is nothing real about a stripper. There is no such thing as a self-respecting stripper. Later, QD.


QFT

[quickdodge®]

I'm not trying to put you down, over just stating facts, lolol.

What happened (if it really happened) was gross, though. Are you sure the brown eye winked. Or was it the Mancave Moan? Later, QD.

[Lurker]

You got hit with a brown eye burp!

[deathrex]

I'm not trying to put you down, over just stating facts, lolol.

What happened (if it really happened) was gross, though. Are you sure the brown eye winked. Or was it the Mancave Moan? Later, QD.

Oh I'm not one to take the internetz seriously lol. I get what youre saying completely. Some just wouldn't understand because I personally know these woman and hang out with them often. And to me they act just the same as if they were at work. I've dated all sorts of girls, just me personally think strippers have the best personality though my experiences. They don't beat arround the bush always to the point and they tell you how it is. Wich is how I am and prefer people to be with me. I hate when women say one thing but mean another. Biggest pet peeve. It's alot easier to tell us men what you want rather than playing the guessing game, but that's just me.

Pretty sure it winked lol. I heard it over the music, and felt it. She acted like nothing happened. I just put the cash down and walked away.

[quickdodge®]

Some just wouldn't understand because I personally know these woman and hang out with them often.

I understand completely. Hence why I said what I did and knew what I was talking about, lolol.

And gross. Later, QD.

[BluesClues]

Wait, wait, WAIT!
When a 300lbs ANYTHING farts, specs of feces normally fly with it at a high rate of speed. Are you sure she didn't shart in your eye? :lmfao:

You might have small molecules of fecal matter in your eye dude. I would pour straight rubbing alcohol in your eye, set it on fire, and repeat process 3 times a day until infection is gone.
:lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

[deathrex]

:lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:


It was horrible. I hope it never happens to anyone ever.

[ShooterMcGavin]

i couldn't decide if i wanted to neg rep you for grossing me out or pos rep you for making me laugh...so no reps given at all :lmao:

[TSiFTW]

Name of said club so I will NEVER go there.

[SUBY_RUE]

Wow, how many times in your life can you say " a fat stripper farted in my face once" haha... Sorry bro, but thats funny as hell....

[myjdm02]

LMAO!!!

[Lurker]

I wish I was there! I would have cried laughing hysterically.

How often can you say you were at the club with a friend and a 300lbs black girl farted in his eye when he slipped her a $5.

Those odds are like winning the lottery.

[JDMbabe]

HOLY shit. that sucks dude

[CasadeWaffle]

lol...

[Greddypacked]

Hea deathrex... you should make a remix of the song "Im in love w/ a stripper" too... "I got farted on by a Stripper!" Send it to Weird Al Yankovich and tell him it's a true story. He might use that, make a video w/ you in it and about your story, and send some money your way LOL. Probably wont work but just saying it might.

[deathrex]

Lol I should make a song. It sucked but even I found it funny as fuck hahaha. I mean seriously, she couldn't just hold it? Reminds me of stepbrothers during the interview when he farts. Except it was more of a poof in my eye lol. Still no pink eye thank god lol.

[bdydrpdmazda]

http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/Tits-Or-GTFO/1/bugstitsgtfo.gif

[Kevykev]

People have a new name for you, what have you done to yourself!???

Self-Degradation

[deathrex]

^ hahahahaha. I thought what happened was funny and disgusting. If people got a laugh out of it good deal if not oh well. And still no pink eye so I think I'm in the clear.

[Lankhoss]

Nothing like watching a "player" get played!

[Black R]

Poor deathrex

damn you should inv us all to go out to this strip club your friends work at

[Friggintitsman]

i tend to date strippers cause there not fake what you see is what you get, there not faking who the are.

anyone else see the stupidity in this statement?

[Justin.]

anyone else see the stupidity in this statement?

Not really, not enough time to act fake between doing the lines of coke and trying to walk in those huge heels.