quickdodge®
10-06-2009, 11:40 AM
I made this in October of 2005. It is a guideline, if you will, to E-Thugging. A lot of you have seen this (PBS, Godfather etc.), but with the influx of noobians, I think a refresher course is necessary. So, here you are:
Q-DIZZLE'S "HOW TO BE AN INTERNET GANGSTER"
You get home and log on to the computer to check your E-mails. As you are doing this, you sign on to your favorite message forum site. It's about this time you notice a negative reply towards you in one of your earlier posts. What do you do? How do you react? Do you just ignore it and move on to the next, thinking you have better things to do than sit and argue with some on the Internet? HELL NO you don't. You need to put this sucka in check and make him learn to respect you. And here is how you do this:
1. First thing you do is discredit his sexuality by calling the person gay. Even if the person is married and has several children, he is still gay. This automatically sets the tone for the upcoming online battle. You have said, in this step, that you WILL NOT STAND for this shit.
2. Next you will make unwarranted comments about the person's car. Even if it is a 20 time NOPI or HIN BOS winner, it is still the "ugliest car evar" and you would "never be caught riding in that car." You are working on crushing his whole pysche by now.
STEP 3 IS IMPORTANT...PAY ATTENTION
3. You've made it this far. Don't let the apology slow you down now. Now's the time for the "I'll kick your ass" posts. You'll go through a series of these posts thus resulting in a "let's meet at the local theater" post to which no one will ever show up. In this stage of the fight, you will start making sexual comments towards the significant other. Comments such as "that's not what your wife said to me last night" or "tell your Mom to fix me some breakfast next time" are crowd favorites that will really set the other person in a fire.
Always remember, although this is the Internet, YOU NEED TO TAKE THIS SHIT SERIOUSLY! THIS IS NOT A JOKE AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. THIS IS YOUR LIFE. TAKE HOLD OF YOUR LIFE AND DON'T LET ANYONE E-BULLY YOU AROUND.
Later, QD.
Q-DIZZLE'S "HOW TO BE AN INTERNET GANGSTER"
You get home and log on to the computer to check your E-mails. As you are doing this, you sign on to your favorite message forum site. It's about this time you notice a negative reply towards you in one of your earlier posts. What do you do? How do you react? Do you just ignore it and move on to the next, thinking you have better things to do than sit and argue with some on the Internet? HELL NO you don't. You need to put this sucka in check and make him learn to respect you. And here is how you do this:
1. First thing you do is discredit his sexuality by calling the person gay. Even if the person is married and has several children, he is still gay. This automatically sets the tone for the upcoming online battle. You have said, in this step, that you WILL NOT STAND for this shit.
2. Next you will make unwarranted comments about the person's car. Even if it is a 20 time NOPI or HIN BOS winner, it is still the "ugliest car evar" and you would "never be caught riding in that car." You are working on crushing his whole pysche by now.
STEP 3 IS IMPORTANT...PAY ATTENTION
3. You've made it this far. Don't let the apology slow you down now. Now's the time for the "I'll kick your ass" posts. You'll go through a series of these posts thus resulting in a "let's meet at the local theater" post to which no one will ever show up. In this stage of the fight, you will start making sexual comments towards the significant other. Comments such as "that's not what your wife said to me last night" or "tell your Mom to fix me some breakfast next time" are crowd favorites that will really set the other person in a fire.
Always remember, although this is the Internet, YOU NEED TO TAKE THIS SHIT SERIOUSLY! THIS IS NOT A JOKE AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. THIS IS YOUR LIFE. TAKE HOLD OF YOUR LIFE AND DON'T LET ANYONE E-BULLY YOU AROUND.
Later, QD.