View Full Version : Are the Pics ok?
Ok say you have been in a relationship for couple months. And your GF/BF has a kid with someone else.
Is it ok for them to have pics of their kid with the father/mother posted on facebook or myspace?
I can understand having the actual pics saved so you can give them to the kid when they get older. but I dont think it is right to have them posted up.
81911SC
09-14-2009, 07:42 PM
Who are we to decide? Different cases, different scenarios.
Evil Goat
09-14-2009, 07:43 PM
he who cares the least pulls the most pussy....
Jecht
09-14-2009, 07:43 PM
Well I don't see why not other than it might cause a misunderstanding with someone who isn't familiar with the person. If it doesn't bother you, why worry?
redfire6i
09-14-2009, 07:45 PM
My ex had pictures of her sons dad on her myspace and it didnt bother me, he was a dick too.
i mean i just dont understand why if you wasnt happy in the relationship with them why have pics posted up
BobbyFresco
09-14-2009, 07:49 PM
So what you're really saying is you're insecure, right?
Evil Goat
09-14-2009, 07:50 PM
i mean i just dont understand why if you wasnt happy in the relationship with them why have pics posted up
insecurity is a bitch sometimes....let it go...remember who she's with and stop being a baby
lanning
09-14-2009, 07:51 PM
she has a kid by him, so as long as she is in your life he will be in your life also
BobbyFresco
09-14-2009, 07:52 PM
And if your gf is a good mother, she's not going to allow you to force the child's father out of the picture, no pun intended. Deal with it.
TSiFTW
09-14-2009, 07:53 PM
insecurity is a bitch sometimes....let it go...remember who she's with and stop being a baby
Exactly. Look at the dude in the picture and say yeah I'm fuckin your ex you SOB, shoulda took better care of her.
she has a kid by him, so as long as she is in your life he will be in your life also
i dont have a problem with that. i have a kid also. but i dont have pics of my daughter with her mother
Slomaro Z28
09-14-2009, 07:54 PM
insecurity is a bitch sometimes....let it go...remember who she's with and stop being a baby
x2, at the end of the day shes in bed with you right?
BobbyFresco
09-14-2009, 07:54 PM
Exactly. Look at the dude in the picture and say yeah I'm fuckin your ex you SOB, shoulda took better care of her.
Because that's ALWAYS the case...:rolleyes:
OP just needs to man up and deal with it.
lanning
09-14-2009, 07:57 PM
i dont have a problem with that. i have a kid also. but i dont have pics of my daughter with her mother
i dated a mom and she had pictures every where with her daughters father, it never really bothered me. i understand where your coming from, but its just myspace. i have pictures with friends that i hate now but im not going to take them down. what does she say about it?
x2, at the end of the day shes in bed with you right?
when she is at my house:goodjob: but she has her own place also
i dated a mom and she had pictures every where with her daughters father, it never really bothered me. i understand where your coming from, but its just myspace. i have pictures with friends that i hate now but im not going to take them down. what does she say about it?
she doesnt think its a problem. but i mean she still has some up of all three of them
quickdodgeŽ
09-14-2009, 08:01 PM
I wouldn't like it at all. The ex is an ex for a reason. That is a past life for her. Shit like that should be boxed up and put away, not displayed across the world. I would never do that to my wife (and I don't). It has nothing to do with insecurities. It's just (to me anyway) proper relationship etiquette. I'm not insecure at all about my relationship and neither is my current wife. Later, QD.
I wouldn't like it at all. The ex is an ex for a reason. That is a past life for her. Shit like that should be boxed up and put away, not displayed across the world. I would never do that to my wife (and I don't). It has nothing to do with insecurities. It's just (to me anyway) proper relationship etiquette. I'm not insecure at all about my relationship and neither is my current wife. Later, QD.
that is exactly how i see it
reps to all
lanning
09-14-2009, 08:04 PM
she doesnt think its a problem. but i mean she still has some up of all three of them
IMO i wouldnt let it bother you, im sure she would have the pictures up if he was in them or not
03RCode
09-14-2009, 08:12 PM
So what you're really saying is you're insecure, right?
That's what I'm getting out of it.
ok let fast forward to the future a little.
say we get married one day. so it will be ok for her to hang up pictures in the house of her daughter and the father?
redfire6i
09-14-2009, 08:18 PM
she doesnt think its a problem. but i mean she still has some up of all three of them
ehhh...thats pushing it for me.
Evil Goat
09-14-2009, 08:39 PM
ok let fast forward to the future a little.
say we get married one day. so it will be ok for her to hang up pictures in the house of her daughter and the father?
man, you're seriously overthinking this....how long have you all been dating?
man, you're seriously overthinking this....how long have you all been dating?
about 6 7 months
Kourt
09-14-2009, 09:08 PM
Wow, I wondered why you put the new pics up on myspace. Honestly my first thought when I saw them was that you and Tori were back together. You dont care what I think but I think it is really weird, even for her to do it. Unless it is a very special picture of the kid like the first smile, or first steps or something then I think there is plenty of pictures that could be posted WITHOUT the other parent in them. Also, I don't think 2 wrongs are going to make a right in this situation. You posting those pictures is kind of putting it accross that you don't care, instead of proving the point that you do. I probably don't have the best advice though since I have neither a baby or babydaddy.
lanning
09-14-2009, 09:56 PM
so you posted pictures of your kid with an ex bc she has her pics with the father up?
ueyedgr8tness
09-14-2009, 09:59 PM
I feel u bro i went through this awhile back but u only worry about it if u plan to marry her.
amandDA
09-15-2009, 12:43 AM
Who are we to decide? Different cases, different scenarios.
agreed 100% no two situations are the same:goodjob:
AnthonyF
09-15-2009, 05:16 AM
Never date anyone that has a kid with some1 else. Many problems solved.
-Ant.
punkr6
09-15-2009, 07:29 AM
Never date anyone that has a kid with some1 else. Many problems solved.
-Ant.
Sooooo True.....:goodjob:
quickdodgeŽ
09-15-2009, 07:35 AM
Sooooo True.....:goodjob:
Soooooo not true (depending on the situation). The wife I have now is the only girl I have ever been in a relationship with that did NOT have a child. I've never had anything but good experiences with women with children. I guess it boils down to the type of dude you are and the type of female the lady is. Later, QD.
punkr6
09-15-2009, 07:39 AM
Soooooo not true (depending on the situation). The wife I have now is the only girl I have ever been in a relationship with that did NOT have a child. I've never had anything but good experiences with women with children. I guess it boils down to the type of dude you are and the type of female the lady is. Later, QD.
I have to desigree, it may have worked out for you. But I see guys everyday that have an enormous amount of problems due to other peoples kids. It can work, but it makes it a lot harder in most cases...
quickdodgeŽ
09-15-2009, 07:39 AM
so you posted pictures of your kid with an ex bc she has her pics with the father up?
Damn.
Nemo, bad move. "Revenge" moves like that will certainly NOT help the situation. Especially if she already thinks there is no problem with it. That is only going to beget more problems between you two. Here's how:
She's ok with putting pics up of exes.
You're not, so you're already irritated.
You put yours up for revenge.
It doesn't bother her because she's cool with that.
That makes you more angry so now you're even more irritated.
Your irritations are then going to start irritating her.
Trying to make someone "see how it feels" is not always the answer. Later, QD.
quickdodgeŽ
09-15-2009, 07:43 AM
I have to desigree, it may have worked out for you. But I see guys everyday that have an enormous amount of problems due to other peoples kids. It can work, but it makes it a lot harder in most cases...
Like I said in parentheses, it all depends on the situation and people. Several questions to ponder:
Do you know for a fact that their problems are due to another's child?
Do you really think that just because you see a few dudes around that may have problems due to another's child that that would mean they all do?
I'm saying you can't base a whole theory around a few people you know of or you knowing more folks that have problems than not, you know. Later, QD.
AnthonyF
09-15-2009, 08:12 AM
Every person is different. Period.
Me personally, I could not be with some1 that had a kid with some1 else. I could never really care for the kid and make him feel like my own and I'd have to deal with the other "parent" including any drama that might follow.
-Ant.
quickdodgeŽ
09-15-2009, 08:28 AM
Every person is different. Period.
Me personally, I could not be with some1 that had a kid with some1 else. I could never really care for the kid and make him feel like my own and I'd have to deal with the other "parent" including any drama that might follow.
-Ant.
Sad, but definitely respectable opinion. Later, QD.
§treet_§peed
09-15-2009, 11:19 AM
I love kids. But I hate EX's that still linger around.
Sammich
09-15-2009, 11:36 AM
I wouldn't like it at all. The ex is an ex for a reason. That is a past life for her. Shit like that should be boxed up and put away, not displayed across the world. I would never do that to my wife (and I don't). It has nothing to do with insecurities. It's just (to me anyway) proper relationship etiquette. I'm not insecure at all about my relationship and neither is my current wife. Later, QD.
AGREED
ShooterMcGavin
09-15-2009, 06:55 PM
and you really care what IA has to think about this matter bc why? :thinking:
Julio
09-15-2009, 08:36 PM
Those pics can be use for good toilet paper...
Just a thought.
he who cares the least pulls the most pussy....
True, but some prefer quality over quantity...
GirlieZ
09-15-2009, 11:18 PM
don't, its a trap!
i kid, i think if you are in a healthy relationship it should not have an effect. Insecurity is a bish and can ruin a relationship.
quickdodgeŽ
09-15-2009, 11:22 PM
i kid, i think if you are in a healthy relationship it should not have an effect. Insecurity is a bish and can ruin a relationship.
Lolol @ people blaming insecurity on this. Later, QD.
SiRed94
09-16-2009, 12:36 AM
I think that out of respect for the person they are with, they should keep those kinds of pictures/memories to their own personal viewing only. Since they have a kid, it seems like they wouldn't being doing too much to fuck up the relationship they are in, being that nobody wants all that baggage anyways. Bold sumbitches are bold.
1MP0RTL0V3R
09-16-2009, 01:27 AM
i dated a girl with a kid once it worked out ok but she wasnt over her ex and right now the girl ive been with for almost 2 years has her godson living with her and a little girl that she adopted. i have no problem with it because the boy has no father since he passed away and the little girl has no parents, it all depends on the person you are and how close you are to the kids. most people think it can be a bad thing dating someone with a kid but in reality a lot that ive known have grown up and the guys that they are with that arent the dads dont mind and there very happy together.
SicStang03
09-16-2009, 09:23 AM
I have been with my GF for over a year and I still have pics of me and my ex on there.. making out and everything... I'm just too lazy to take them down... she has seen them, just never asked me to get rid of them... If she asked I would take them down no questions asked.
I think it's more a jealousy/insecurity thing honestly... If she is with you, you shouldn't care about some pictures.
quickdodgeŽ
09-16-2009, 09:26 AM
I think it's more a jealousy/insecurity thing honestly...
Lolol. I guess some people don't know the difference between respect and insecure. Later, QD.
SicStang03
09-16-2009, 09:39 AM
Lolol. I guess some people don't know the difference between respect and insecure. Later, QD.
insecurity leeds to jealousy... can we agree on that?
So what's wrong with having a picture of your kid and the father up for the public to see?
quickdodgeŽ
09-16-2009, 09:52 AM
insecurity leeds to jealousy... can we agree on that?
We can definitely agree with that.
So what's wrong with having a picture of your kid and the father up for the public to see?
It's really in the eyes of each couple. I see it as a respect issue. There are certain things that are in the past that can be kept up for the now. Like the days of growing up and college days and events that take place in your life or whatever. Then there are things that are in the past that should just be kept in the past. Relationships such as marriages (with or without children), long relationships (with or without children) would be an example. Hail I used to think that the other should just toss any picture of an ex in the trash forever. But, especially with children involved, I see it a necessity to keep that kind of past for the children to have in their future. To see their parent from back then.
But as far as publicizing the pics for everyone to see just comes off as a disrespect to the person you are with now. It's like "I love you, but not enough to put my ex behind me" type thing. And I see where it can be a breeding ground for insecurity and jealousy. And that's not good for a relationship. So why have the pics up and cause strife in your time together when it would be so easy to put them away? Unless you really are NOT over that ex.
And I'm pretty sure most (if not all) parents have plenty of pictures of their children without the ex in them to show off. Later, QD.
SicStang03
09-16-2009, 10:10 AM
We can definitely agree with that.
It's really in the eyes of each couple. I see it as a respect issue. There are certain things that are in the past that can be kept up for the now. Like the days of growing up and college days and events that take place in your life or whatever. Then there are things that are in the past that should just be kept in the past. Relationships such as marriages (with or without children), long relationships (with or without children) would be an example. Hail I used to think that the other should just toss any picture of an ex in the trash forever. But, especially with children involved, I see it a necessity to keep that kind of past for the children to have in their future. To see their parent from back then.
But as far as publicizing the pics for everyone to see just comes off as a disrespect to the person you are with now. It's like "I love you, but not enough to put my ex behind me" type thing. And I see where it can be a breeding ground for insecurity and jealousy. And that's not good for a relationship. So why have the pics up and cause strife in your time together when it would be so easy to put them away? Unless you really are NOT over that ex.
And I'm pretty sure most (if not all) parents have plenty of pictures of their children without the ex in them to show off. Later, QD.
You have some good points in there.. I guess everyone is different. For me, I could really care less... If the pics where already there before I came along, they can stay IMO... But if she is uploading them while she is with you than that could be a problem.
quickdodgeŽ
09-16-2009, 10:12 AM
. If the pics where already there before I came along, they can stay IMO... But if she is uploading them while she is with you than that could be a problem.
I can see that point as well. Later, QD.
stillaneon
09-16-2009, 01:55 PM
It has nothing to do with insecurity. It has to do with Respect.
Nemo, you and I are in similar positions. My Girlfriend has 2 kids by another guy. I wouldn't have a problem with pictures of him being around, but she wouldn;t disrespect me that way.
If this becomes an issue, you need to sit down and talk to her, explain why you feel it is disrespectful and if she doesn;t understand and can't be somewhat respectful and remove them, then it may be time to go your seperate ways
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