Husbands and Wives Store

[TheGodfather]

The New Husbands Store -- a store that sells husbands -- has opened recently. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. You may choose any item from a particular floor or go up to the next floor, but you may not go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These Men Have Jobs!
She is intrigued but continues to the second floor where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These Men Have Jobs and Love Kids!!
'That's nice, she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These Men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking!!!
'Wow,' she thinks but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These Men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework!!!!
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still -- she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These Men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak!!!!!

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads

































Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.


PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

Floor 1 - These Wives Have Money!

Floor 2 - These Wives Have Money and Like Alcohol!!

Floor 3 - These Wives Have Money, Like Alcohol and Love Sex!!!

Floors 4, 5, and 6 have never been visited.

[TheGrillMan]

LOL

repped

[Ran]

LOLLEREPOSTFROM1998LMAO!

[TheGodfather]

LOLLEREPOSTFROM1998LMAO!

:( Lame.

First time I've seen it, so NO REPOST FOR ME!

[Jecht]

Old as F*CK

[thinkfast®]

1994 CALLED, THEY SAID THIS CAME W/ THE CD ENTITLED "WELCOME TO THE INTERNETS"

LAME ASS THREAD GET RID OF IT, WHATTA WASTE

[autumnk5]

Matt, If I saw you on the first floor, I would buy you immediately. No need to go up. :)

[Ran]

Matt, If I saw you on the first floor, I would buy you immediately. No need to go up. :)Bow chica wow wow~

[TheGodfather]

1994 CALLED, THEY SAID THIS CAME W/ THE CD ENTITLED "WELCOME TO THE INTERNETS"

LAME ASS THREAD GET RID OF IT, WHATTA WASTE

Blow me border jumper.



And thanks Autumn :goodjob:

[thinkfast®]

ONLY THING I JUMPED WAS THAT FENCE TO YA MOMS BACKYARD MR. CAWK COMMANDO.. BLOW ME

ALSO PLEASE DONT TOUCH THE TECATES IN THE FRIDGE, I BEST HAVE A COLD ONE WHEN I GET HOME OR ELSE.. HEY HEY DONT YOU WALK AWAY FROM ME

[Maniac1]

Hey Matt, easy with the border jumping jokes, I wouldn't want to own you infront of autumn. That would be embarrassing.

[thinkfast®]

ONLY THING YOU OWN IS A SLOW ASS 4 DOOR

BLOW ME ESE

[Maniac1]

I wasn't talking to you estupido. LOL And my sedan makes your wreck you call a car look like it's standing still, round here. Check it! You said you almost had me? You never had your car, junior. Keep it movin esa.

[thinkfast®]

WHEN YOU START ON THE SPANISH LESSONS JR, IM ALMOST PROUD OF YOU

[thinkfast®]

AND WHAT WRECK YOU TALKIN ABOUT, ***** I GOT CHROME FOR DAYS LETS CRUISE ONE NITE AND SEE WHO PULLS WHAT

4 DOOR OUTBACK

2 DOOR CLASSICK

HOLLA AT ME NALGONA

[Maniac1]

LOL I'll still your attention with my exhaust tone. You might pull more pu55y, but I'll pull the respect! :lmao:

[Maniac1]

LOL @ nalgona! And steal* ^ made a small error.

[thinkfast®]

ILL TEACH YOU SOMETHIN ABOUT RESPECT NEXT TIME I SEE YOU HIJO DE SU CHINGADA MADRE

[Maniac1]

Is that a promise? No me mentas si no te voy a cortar tu's bollas e selas voy a tera a tu novio en la cara... EL OH EL!

[On_Her_Face]

good laugh

[TheGodfather]

Get this illegal sh!t out of my thread.

Both of yall head back to Mexico and stfu.

[Maniac1]

I actually typed out a verbose reply to your post, but let me cancel that and just say to you, stfu. You nor anyone would ever say that sh!t infront of me and ricky. LOL so it's funny reading those type of posts.

[Maniac1]

Please continue...

[TheGodfather]

I would say all of it in front of both of you.

And don't start with that damn e-thuggin, telling me to back it up.

I'm in Tampa, and neither of you illegal Rio Grande swimmers are worth 7 hours of driving.

[thinkfast®]

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b287/LegendGuy/blackjesus2_2.gif

[Maniac1]

Matt matt matt... LOL I don't need to bring the "meet me in person" statement to own you. And you know this. It's cool if you use mexcan jokes on AIM and outside of my reach of reading and or hearing, but on the forum? C'mon, you should know better by now. Welcome to moronville, population you and autumn.

[autumnk5]

Matt matt matt... LOL I don't need to bring the "meet me in person" statement to own you. And you know this. It's cool if you use mexcan jokes on AIM and outside of my reach of reading and or hearing, but on the forum? C'mon, you should know better by now. Welcome to moronville, population you and autumn.

Alex, are you still being testy about the thread?

I thought we were supposed to discuss punishment not talk bad about me.

[Maniac1]

Hey hey hey, calm down. I know what im doing...

[isa2o3]

holy ****. haha

[TheGodfather]

Alex you motherfVcker I'll mess you up.

This forum is just as fair game as the AIM chats.

Go ahead and say something about me being white, english speaking, and American...oh wait. I win.

[Maniac1]

Mess me up? You're too late man, im already bored. I was down earlier but I guess you were too busy poppin all of your pimples. Proactive man, it does wonders(so ive heard).

[TheGodfather]

Mess me up? You're too late man, im already bored. I was down earlier but I guess you were too busy poppin all of your pimples. Proactive man, it does wonders(so ive heard).

Pimples...? :thinking:

[Maniac1]

Ok fucc it. Let me start off by saying your little rambling didn't even have a modicum of intelligence in it. Not that I expected white trailer trash like you to spew anything more stimulating than a dr. seuss book though. Where to begin? Why don't you go back to your pansy activitys and hit up your chucking feces bandit crew?

Your move, buddy.

[Maniac1]

Keep it going Junior. I'd school your ass, LOL you're already fuking up.

[TheGodfather]

Don't even try that with me chump.

No white trash here, not even close. Try from up north and very clean and well raised?

But thats ok, being that your mother and father probably died while trying to get into this country, I wouldn't expect your education level to be up to par.

Check.

[Maniac1]

How you gonna front man? With your low reading comprehension, it's a waste of my time to type out one of my ingenious replies. So much of it would probably go over your head. You couldn't even begin to climb up my mt. everest level, scrub. Save yourself the embarrassment, you don't want your girlfriend autumn thinking you are any less of a man anymore then she already knows.

[TheGodfather]

How you gonna front man? With your low reading comprehension, it's a waste of my time to type out one of my ingenious replies. So much of it would probably go over your head. You couldn't even begin to climb up my mt. everest level, scrub. Save yourself the embarrassment, you don't want your girlfriend autumn thinking you are any less of a man anymore then she already knows.

Dude get that shit the fuck outta here.

You don't want to see where this would go, and obviously the low reading comprehension is on your side friend since you ignored my previous post.

But then again, if I fought so hard against learning english such as your people do, I might miss some things as well. Now I know you can clearly speak english and type it, unless you are using freetranslation.com, which wouldn't suprise me.

So please act like a civil American and step up to the plate. Do something your family is incapable of doing and take some damn responsibility.

[Maniac1]

Sorry if I ignored your incompetent post. I didn't see a reason to reply to it, maybe if it made any form of sense I would've. You don't piss excellence, yet you act all high and mighty. What a joke man, you're worth about as much as the sh!t I stepped on earlier. Jump off my throne already, cinderella.

[Maniac1]

Come on skippy, even a blind man can see that you're running on over drive. You'll eventually die on me.

[TheGodfather]

So the seemingly perfect Alex stepped on some **** earlier huh? Doesn't suprise me. Tell your sister to use those depends, and that loose uncontrollable sh!ts will happen after what I did to her asshole. My posts make enough sense to the average person, but then again being the scum that you are that goes way over your head. Your throne is nothing but the cardboard box you are standing on. And Lord knows that won't hold much longer. When you wanna challenge me for king of the hill, come up with something decent.

[Maniac1]

What the hell was that? You're babbling like a school girl, Matt. You don't have it in you, just put your wooden sword away, my caliber isn't something you want to mess with. Now, im being nice, I gave you the green light to step up, why haven't you? Please, I know it's hard with you only have a few hundred brain cells and all, but do it for the sake of your mother. Don't you want to avenge her death?

Now, I wouldn't be calling others stupid if I was as retarded as you. Every time I read one of your posts, I wanna rip my eyelids off. You make Mario Cantone wanna go straight with all these gay ass posts you're marinating.

Also, sorry I took long to reply, I was takin a smoke break.

[TheGodfather]

What the hell was that? You're babbling like a school girl, Matt. You don't have it in you, just put your wooden sword away, my caliber isn't something you want to mess with. Now, im being nice, I gave you the green light to step up, why haven't you? Please, I know it's hard with you only have a few hundred brain cells and all, but do it for the sake of your mother. Don't you want to avenge her death?

Now, I wouldn't be calling others stupid if I was as retarded as you. Every time I read one of your posts, I wanna rip my eyelids off. You make Mario Cantone wanna go straight with all these gay ass posts you're marinating.

Also, sorry I took long to reply, I was takin a smoke break.

You gonna call me stupid and lacking brain cells? Your smoke break was smoking cigs. Yeah you know, the leading cause of PREVENTABLE death and cancer in the United States. So that shows how much intelligence you have.

And again with the Mario Cantone jokes? Get something new man. That tired ass ****** isn't worth sh!t to me, and the crush you have on him doesn't make me care any more.

Each time I read one of your posts, I think deportation cannot come soon enough.

[Maniac1]

Think about what you just said for a sec. Im dumb for smoking, yet my IQ level is much higer than yours? Me, being mexican, and im still smarter than you? Seriously? Like are you seriously this stupid? Really, this isn't a joke anymore. At first I was playing but now the joke has gone too far. I mean, you do know it's not April 1st anymore, don't you? Mario Cantone is a perfect example, of how gay you are. On weekends you reach a Richard Simmons level of gayness, but it's tuesday.

You're using all these hispanic jokes like they hold any water. Please step your game up. Right now it's looking like a cat is stepping up to a pitbull. It's not going to be pretty for you once I start using my one hit wonder posts. Now, please. Show me a few of your tricks, and im not talking about the deep throat one, don't get exicted now...

[Echonova]

MOAR!!!!!!!!!! I'll be back in a few, I want to see blood.

[TheGodfather]

No I did not recognize your supposed high level of intelligence. See I was using sarcasm there. Something apparently you aren't too good at.

Your examples are weak and your insults are weak. These posts make my little cousin seem mean. I would hope you can't be seriuos in any of this, because it's just not cutting it.

You are saying the joke has gone to far? Well you are the only joke I see in here. Go ahead, cut the wrists.

[Maniac1]

Hey Matt, sorry your mother was out being a whore instead of tending to your soiled underpants last week. I'd say something about your dad, but I doubt you know who that is. Your lack of anything, PERIOD, is hurting my head. Just trying to read your pathetic combination of words makes me feel like im having a hangover. And your attempt at trying to own me failed as bad as your mother's abortion attempt.

[Echonova]

Banned again????????

[TheGodfather]

Hahahahah, banned.

Looks like I win.

[thinkfast®]

SMELLS LIKE IGNORANCE IN HERE

[TheGodfather]

Smells like dirty illegals in here.


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