Top 10 Signs that you're a Dumb@ss Atheist [Archive] - IMPORTATLANTA.COM - Automotive, Lifestyle, Offtopic, Forum, Blog, & Online Community

Ran

01-24-2008, 08:41 AM

I'm actually agnostic myself. I just felt like playing Devil's Advocate considering all the anti-religion threads that get posted. :D

Top Ten Signs you're a Dumb@ss Atheist

10. You vigorously deny the existence of God, yet you frequently blame him for everything that is wrong in modern society.
9. You repeatedly insist that man did not, in fact, evolve from an ape. Apes and men both evolved from another species who did not resemble Curious George in any way.
8. You criticize Christians who don't know their Bible, yet you have never opened any of Darwin's texts.
7. While all created evidence and reasoning point to a Creator and absolute truth, you prefer to hide behind relativism and a theory of evolution which does not, in fact, describe the creation of the universe at all.
6. You can't seem to understand the fundamental differences between fundamental Muslims and fundamental Christians (hint: strap-on TNT)
5. You willingly attribute all historical atrocities in Europe to a demographic that contained approximately 100% of Europeans during the period in question.
4. You also like to ignore the beneficial discoveries of the aforementioned demographic.
3. You don't realize that a closed system can be defined however the observer wants, so you throw out technological phrases to try to ignore the implications of thermodynamics.
2. You accuse Christians of being hateful and you hope that they DIAF.
1. Your biggest complaint is that these typically hopeful and caring people want to share the greatest single thing in their life with you. You're like an idiot who wipes with winning lottery tickets.

Crazy Asian

01-24-2008, 08:42 AM

BAHAHAHAH RAN!!!

Sammich

01-24-2008, 08:44 AM

this could get serious

collins

01-24-2008, 08:46 AM

lol kinda funny

soul

01-24-2008, 09:06 AM

lol ++reps funny

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 09:37 AM

so I guess the question is do you believe there is such thing as an intelligent Atheist

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 09:41 AM

7. While all created evidence and reasoning point to a Creator and absolute truth, you prefer to hide behind relativism and a theory of evolution which does not, in fact, describe the creation of the universe at all.

LOL...created evidence:???:

I guess if you don't have any real evidence just create some.

Ran

01-24-2008, 09:44 AM

LOL...created evidence:???:

I guess if you don't have any real evidence just create some.I think they were referring to "physical" evidence but used the word "created" in relation to a creator, a.k.a. God.

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 09:47 AM

I think they were referring to "physical" evidence but used the word "created" in relation to a creator, a.k.a. God.

Those silly Christians....

If God created the world did he also create the fossils? Or was that Satan up to his usual tricks?

soul

01-24-2008, 09:49 AM

LOL...created evidence:???:

I guess if you don't have any real evidence just create some.
E=mc²........

Ran

01-24-2008, 09:50 AM

Those silly Christians....

If God created the world did he also create the fossils? Or was that Satan up to his usual tricks?Satan is one sneaky b@stard. Trust nothing!

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 09:54 AM

Satan is one sneaky b@stard. Trust nothing!

OMGNOEZZZ!!!

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 09:54 AM

The way I look at it is, I'd rather believe in God and be wrong, than not to believe in anything and have no chance at an afterlife.:2cents:

Those silly Christians....

If God created the world did he also create the fossils? Or was that Satan up to his usual tricks?

Fossils of what? Dinosaurs? So you don't think God could have created dinosaurs? I mean, if anything dies in the right place at the right time it can become fossilized.

Ran

01-24-2008, 09:56 AM

Fossils of what? Dinosaurs? So you don't think God could have created dinosaurs? I mean, if anything dies in the right place at the right time it can become fossilized.Dinosaurs were the blueprint for humans.

"Well now, this isn't quite working out." - God

He then proceeded to destroy the world with a meteor and go through the seven days (figurative days, not actual) of creation bringing together mammals, man, and a magical tree with celestial knowledge.

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 09:59 AM

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 10:00 AM

Dinosaurs were the blueprint for humans.

"Well now, this isn't quite working out." - God

He then proceeded to destroy the world with a meteor and go through the seven days (figurative days, not actual) of creation bringing together mammals, man, and a magical tree with celestial knowledge.

Anything's possible. I didn't get the memo so I was unable to attend the event.

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 10:01 AM

Wait, God went throught the 7 days again? Was that before or after the tree of knowledge??

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 10:02 AM

The way I look at it is, I'd rather believe in God and be wrong, than not to believe in anything and have no chance at an afterlife.:2cents:

Just because you don't believe in Christianity/Bible doesn't mean you don't believe in god. And may I ask why you chose Christiantity as your religion? what appeals tou about christianity that isn't found in other organized religion?

Fossils of what? Dinosaurs? So you don't think God could have created dinosaurs? I mean, if anything dies in the right place at the right time it can become fossilized.

I never said he couldn't have created them, I just don't remember reading about them in the bible. I don't claim to be an expert on the bible so maybe I missed something.

Ran

01-24-2008, 10:03 AM

Wait, God went throught the 7 days again? Was that before or after the tree of knowledge??Before. Dinosaurs were, more or less, the rough draft for our modern world. It's not included in the Bible because, well, you don't submit your rough draft with your final work now do you?

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 10:05 AM

OMG, I think they may have been joking. The thing that pisses me off more about the Christian outlook is how bent out of shape they get when you question something (or make a joke) but yet you can bash an Atheist's beliefs (or lack thereof) and its ok. Why is there a double standard? Just like KAmikaze^^^ who, by his phrasing, seems to be about ready to cry because he thinks you said god cant make fossils....

LOL who's crying? I was simply interjecting my opinion just as I, and everyone else, am entitled to do. You seem to be the one getting all bent out of shape, all poised and ready to attack. Do you feel threatened by me or something?

I really couldn't care less about you and what you believe. And I really mean that. I was just hoping for an intelligent debate, but I can see that's not possible. I forgot what site I am on. Silly me. ;)

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 10:05 AM

Well I just thought that maybe the dinosaurs were part of the 7 days. I think its kinda silly to think that the 7 days in the beginning were literal. you may but I would assume that it was 7 days figuratively. Especially since a day then wouldnt have existed considering god didnt make the heavens and the earth until the second day. What was the break? How did he know it was day 2?

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 10:08 AM

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 10:09 AM

Before. Dinosaurs were, more or less, the rough draft for our modern world. It's not included in the Bible because, well, you don't submit your rough draft with your final work now do you?

And how do you know this if it isn't in the bible? I thought on the first day of creation god said "let their be light". Did Dinosaurs live in darkness? (or maybe their like cats and have really good night vision).

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 10:11 AM

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d122/ddunlap/christianity.jpg...

Ran

01-24-2008, 10:13 AM

And how do you know this if it isn't in the bible? I thought on the first day of creation god said "let their be light". Did Dinosaurs live in darkness? (or maybe their like cats and have really good night vision).God inspired insight? :dunno: I dunno. I'm just throwing sh*t out there to put fuel on the fire. I'm not a fan of organized religion, but I also think that being a complete atheist is just ignorance of the unknown. Watching the two extremes argue back and forth is always fun though.

stillaneon

01-24-2008, 10:17 AM

but isnt that what religion is? A way to explain the unexplainable. people dont like not knowing and it gives them security without proof. Isnt that Naive??

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 10:19 AM

You honestly dont want to debate with me... I posted on this thread knowing that I will be hit with a lot of **** for being Atheist. I always have been. But like I said, Its a huge double standard. you can say im wrong, and its ok. but I say your wrong and I am unintelligent...... makes since.. completely

Read the following very carefully:

I don't care what you believe.

Really dude, you can believe what you want. I don't care. However, don't try and attack me just because I don't agree with you. And you tried to call me out on a double standard? Obviously, you did not read my statement correctly. I said, I (as in me) would rather be wrong about believing in God and have a 50% chance of an afterlife than to not believe in anything (which goes for all religions) and have 0%. That's just my own personal outlook on things. I'm not saying anyone has to agree with me, but it's not like I give a **** whether they do or not. :)

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 10:21 AM

God inspired insight? :dunno: I dunno. I'm just throwing sh*t out there to put fuel on the fire. I'm not a fan of organized religion, but I also think that being a complete atheist is just ignorance of the unknown. Watching the two extremes argue back and forth is always fun though.

LoL...I know. I'm doing the same as well. I think anyone who is ABSOLUTELY sure of how the world was created or what lies in the after life is full of **** though. Believe what you want (and I respect that), but to live inside a shell where anything that goes against your beliefs is automatically thrown out is ignorant, but makes for entertaining threads and allows the time at work to pass much quicker.

civic95

01-24-2008, 10:21 AM

Jesus would not approve of this post. Go eat some crackers (pretending it's his flesh), and wash them down with wine (pretending it's his blood). Ask for his forgiveness. We don't want you to be stuck here with us on 12/12/2012 at 12:12pm.

Ran

01-24-2008, 10:22 AM

We should all just believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster (http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/) and call it a day.

Google that story if you want. It's pretty funny actually.

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 10:25 AM

civic95

01-24-2008, 10:25 AM

We should all just believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster (http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/) and call it a day.

Google that story if you want. It's pretty funny actually.

I used to be a member, but my gf was a Church of Jedi member. So I converted

http://www.jedichurch.com/

ubers2k

01-24-2008, 10:37 AM

I'm a Christian, true, but I'm not a leg-humper with the religion. I don't really believe in organized religion. I think it's a joke. My grandmother is the one that turned me off of that, actually. Damn Seventh Day Adventist "cult" members.

Anyway, I'm gonna have to agree with Kamikaze on the whole atheists and everyone doing what they want in the religion area. Believe what you want. Yes, some of the hardcore religious people are gonna bash believing in nothing or something not of the Christian belief/faith, but it's a choice that you as an person can make.

180inprogress, it seems like you honestly don't like being told that atheism is wrong. Nobody here said that, and I really don't think anyone here gives a **** if you are or are not atheist. If anything, the initial post was more of a joke than anything else. You can believe what you want about the Christian faith, or any other one for that matter. Not a single person is going to stop you.

Oh, and organized religion is a joke, really.

bu villain

01-24-2008, 12:40 PM

I said, I (as in me) would rather be wrong about believing in God and have a 50% chance of an afterlife than to not believe in anything (which goes for all religions) and have 0%.

1. What if there is a God and he doesn't care whether you believe in him or not?
2. What if there is a God but you believe in the wrong one? (he doesn't mind non believers but hates when you believe in the wrong God).
3. What if there are multiple Gods and it pisses them off when you say there is only one?

If you take into account all the possibilities, there is no reason to think your any better off believing than not believing. I am an atheist not because I choose to be, but because I see no choice given the information I have. I couldn't wake up tomorrow and decide to believe in the tooth fairy, could you?

Kamikaze

01-24-2008, 12:48 PM

1. What if there is a God and he doesn't care whether you believe in him or not?
2. What if there is a God but you believe in the wrong one? (he doesn't mind non believers but hates when you believe in the wrong God).
3. What if there are multiple Gods and it pisses them off when you say there is only one?

If you take into account all the possibilities, there is no reason to think your any better off believing than not believing. I am an atheist not because I choose to be, but because I see no choice given the information I have. I couldn't wake up tomorrow and decide to believe in the tooth fairy, could you?

Like I've said repeatedly, you're entitled to your opinion. But at the end of the day, what you think isn't going to change my mind and I'm not trying to change yours. :goodjob:

Mach1DrmGrl

01-24-2008, 12:52 PM

I don't believe in the bible, cause it's a man-made book

I don't believe in going to church, cause it's a man-made building.

I believe in what I feel in my heart, not what people preach.

soul

01-24-2008, 12:58 PM

New age.....

YoungGun

01-24-2008, 01:04 PM

I'm a Christian and believe what I believe for my own reasons. I've researched different religions, gone to different churches, read different books, etc... I don't believe exactly what my parents believe cause its comfortable or cause I grew up in it. Are there flaws to religion... yes but there are flaws in science too. Is there evolution.... yes but its micro evolution and never macro evolution. If all evolved through micro there would be a complete fossil record with every parent generation filled in. Macro evolution is not physically possible even according to science. Does believing in creation take faith... yes but so does believing in evolution. Can I explain every single possible question.... not a chance nor will I try. I made my decision based on evidence I gathered for a number of years not out of the blue. Hell even Darwin himself said evolution as a full theory was a croc of ****.

Magnus213

01-24-2008, 01:16 PM

Pretty weak list. Believe whatever you'd like, though.

Kelly

01-24-2008, 01:25 PM

Dinosaurs were the blueprint for humans.

"Well now, this isn't quite working out." - God

He then proceeded to destroy the world with a meteor and go through the seven days (figurative days, not actual) of creation bringing together mammals, man, and a magical tree with celestial knowledge.

OR He could've flooded it... Noah to the rescue!!! ;)

Ran

01-24-2008, 01:31 PM

Hell even Darwin himself said evolution as a full theory was a croc of ****.As reported by his heavily Christian wife who was alone at his bedside when he died. It has never been confirmed if he actually said that, or if it was his religious wife trying to tear down his theory.

Kelly

01-24-2008, 01:35 PM

Read the following very carefully:

I don't care what you believe.

Really dude, you can believe what you want. I don't care. However, don't try and attack me just because I don't agree with you. And you tried to call me out on a double standard? Obviously, you did not read my statement correctly. I said, I (as in me) would rather be wrong about believing in God and have a 50% chance of an afterlife than to not believe in anything (which goes for all religions) and have 0%. That's just my own personal outlook on things. I'm not saying anyone has to agree with me, but it's not like I give a **** whether they do or not. :)

If you're going to be a Christian, don't do it just to get to Heaven. :no:

I mean yeah, that's the ultimate goal in a round about way... But having a relationship with God and showing the love of God to others is what it is about. I'm not chastizing you, I'm just throwin in my :2cents:

Magnus213

01-24-2008, 01:37 PM

...I'm just throwin in my :2cents:
Do you ever wonder why, when we want to know what someone else is thinking, we say "penny for your thoughts?" But when we give our own opinions, we're throwing in our two cents? Personal opinion = 2 x others' opinions?

Cough.

So back on topic.

Kelly

01-24-2008, 01:40 PM

Do you ever wonder why, when we want to know what someone else is thinking, we say "penny for your thoughts?" But when we give our own opinions, we're throwing in our two cents? Personal opinion = 2 x others' opinions?

Cough.

So back on topic.

Yes because I am the princess and I matter more! :tongue:

ANYWAYS, I wonder if this verse refers to dinosaurs?

Genesis 1:30
30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so.

soul

01-24-2008, 01:44 PM

Yes because I am the princess and I matter more! :tongue:

ANYWAYS, I wonder if this verse refers to dinosaurs?

Genesis 1:30
30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so.
lets not quote the bible its contradictory throughout and with all of history

Kelly

01-24-2008, 01:45 PM

I'm a Christian... It's what we do :D

civic95

01-24-2008, 02:52 PM

Yes because I am the princess and I matter more! :tongue:

ANYWAYS, I wonder if this verse refers to dinosaurs?

Genesis 1:30
30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so.

How come some green plants will kill you if you eat them?

Kelly

01-24-2008, 03:37 PM

That was for black people :D

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 03:46 PM

I'd like to post in here and get the thread "poppin" lol but it looks like no ones up for a discussion. It's more like, I believe this you believe that, move on cause I ain't tryin to hear it. How lame! Ran, you failed to bring entertainment to IA today(Of course, you never really do so it's ok).

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 03:50 PM

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 03:56 PM

Or maybe this topic has been discussed eleventy billion times and nobody is going to change anyone's mind. What's the point?Your calculations are way off. Lolol. And you think I didn't know that? Still, it's fun to see what other people have to say/post about your opinion on the subject... I know im usually on of the first to jump in a religion type thread, just because it's so much fun reading what other people have to say about it. And if you haven't noticed yet, no one here is trying to change anyones point of view, we're just trying to understand why they choose to think that way.

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 04:09 PM

Your calculations are way off. Lolol. And you think I didn't know that? Still, it's fun to see what other people have to say/post about your opinion on the subject... I know im usually on of the first to jump in a religion type thread, just because it's so much fun reading what other people have to say about it. And if you haven't noticed yet, no one here is trying to change anyones point of view, we're just trying to understand why they choose to think that way.

NO, you just want to argue with people on the internet and attempt to put them down with your lame ass jokes in hopes that some other moron will rep you. I've seen the other threads and I know how you roll...:gay:

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 04:13 PM

NO, you just want to argue with people on the internet and attempt to put them down with your lame ass jokes in hopes that some other moron will rep you. I've seen the other threads and I know how you roll...:gay:Hmmmm ok? Seeing as you know how I "roll" there is no sense in you continuing with this conversation seeing as you will only help "me" achieve more rep points.

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 04:19 PM

your lame ass jokes

Hmmmm ok? Seeing as you know how I "roll" there is no sense in you continuing with this conversation seeing as you will only help "me" achieve more rep points.

I rest my case.

BTW: How many more times do you think you could fit the phrase 'seeing as' in the same sentence?

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 04:22 PM

I rest my case.

BTW: How many more times do you think you could fit the phrase 'seeing as' in the same sentence?I wasn't "joking" dude. LOL Im just trying to prevent an argument that has nothing to do with the subject. I don't think I've ever started any drama with you, so this is something new to me. Lmk if you really have an issue with me or you're just trying to protect the fact that you're b!tch.

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 04:30 PM

Dude whats taking you so long? Either you just suck at talking sh!t or you are trying way to hard to prove a point to someone who just doesn't give a fuk.

Maniac1

01-24-2008, 04:35 PM

Spectic Tank, you took too long. Later, maybe next time you'll have your joke book out and ready. K!

Crazy Asian

01-24-2008, 04:35 PM

different people voice different opinions. Get on with life. Jeez.

Spectic Tank

01-24-2008, 04:40 PM

Dude whats taking you so long? Either you just suck at talking sh!t or you are trying way to hard to prove a point to someone who just doesn't give a fuk.

Or maybe I got a J-O-B that requires me to function at a level higher than a 5th grader and can't chit-chat with you.

DAMN...3 posts in a row...hold on to your tighty wightey's! you will be addressed when I damn well feel like it. Although, I do understand you have reruns of Real World and My Super Sweet Sixteen to watch so I will try to reply quicker next time.

bu villain

01-25-2008, 02:47 PM

Like I've said repeatedly, you're entitled to your opinion. But at the end of the day, what you think isn't going to change my mind and I'm not trying to change yours. :goodjob:

I think that's unforunate that you refuse to let your mind be changed. Do you have that same mindset for everything or just religion? Instead of discussing what part of my reasoning is incorrect you basically said "I am not even going to consider what you are saying." I am an atheist but it is possible that at some point I will feel there is enough evidence to believe in a God. If someone feels they have some proof, I am more than open to hear what they have to say. I will reevaluate my beliefs everytime I find new evidence. What is the point of posting in these threads if you are not even going to consider the merit of what the other person is saying.

Mach1DrmGrl

01-25-2008, 02:52 PM

there is no heaven or hell...reincarnation for all!!!

Kelly

01-25-2008, 04:16 PM

:umno:

Vayda

01-25-2008, 05:24 PM

I'm not an athiest, but i like playing devil's advocate too :D

Top Ten Signs you're a Dumb@ss Atheist

10. You vigorously deny the existence of God, yet you frequently blame him for everything that is wrong in modern society.
And you frequently expound on his existance, yet have no explanation for why bad things happen.

9. You repeatedly insist that man did not, in fact, evolve from an ape. Apes and men both evolved from another species who did not resemble Curious George in any way.

Um....that IS the theory...so...grats, you learned something today.

8. You criticize Christians who don't know their Bible, yet you have never opened any of Darwin's texts.

That's because Christians have only one argument: the Bible. Athiests, on the other hand, have thousands of sources, and can argue just as well without reading Darwin (who was terribly dry.)

7. While all created evidence and reasoning point to a Creator and absolute truth, you prefer to hide behind relativism and a theory of evolution which does not, in fact, describe the creation of the universe at all.

Yeah. All the evidence you CREATED does point to it. The evidence in the real world, however, points to you being the moron.

6. You can't seem to understand the fundamental differences between fundamental Muslims and fundamental Christians (hint: strap-on TNT)

Yes!! That is so true!! Fundy Christians don't get killed by the bombs they throw on abortion clinics. At least the Muslims take themselves out with it. (Hint: that's darwinism)

5. You willingly attribute all historical atrocities in Europe to a demographic that contained approximately 100% of Europeans during the period in question.

I thought we were talking about Athiesm?

4. You also like to ignore the beneficial discoveries of the aforementioned demographic.

I thought we were still talking about athiesm? Correct me if i'm wrong here, i just didnt get the joke.

3. You don't realize that a closed system can be defined however the observer wants, so you throw out technological phrases to try to ignore the implications of thermodynamics.

implications of thermodynamics? WTF? "The relationship between heat and other properties"....Yeah, but we're the ones that just throw around random big words.

2. You accuse Christians of being hateful and you hope that they DIAF.

We also accuse them of not understanding the concept of irony.

1. Your biggest complaint is that these typically hopeful and caring people want to share the greatest single thing in their life with you. You're like an idiot who wipes with winning lottery tickets.

The greatest single thing in my life is extreme gay sex, preferably with some heroine, cocaine, or at the very least, a total lack of protection. Can i share THAT with you??