The Perfect Day

[YoTa_BoX]

A Woman's Perfect Day



8:15 Wake up to hugs and kisses


8:30 Weigh-in 5 lbs lighter than yesterday


8:45 Breakfast in bed-freshly squeezed orange juice and
croissants;open presents- expensive jewelry chosen by thoughtful partner


9:15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil


10:00 Light work-out at club with sexy, funny personal trainer


10:30 Facial, manicure, makeup application, shampoo, condition, blow wave


12:00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor café


12:45 Catch sight of partner's ex and notice that she has gained 22lbs


1:00 Shopping with friends: unlimited credit


3:00 Nap


4:00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist; card is from secret admirer


4:15 Massage from strong but gentle hunk-says he rarely gets to work
on such a perfect body


5:30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe


7:30 Candlelit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments
received from other diners/ dancers


10:00 Hot shower- alone


10:50 Carried to bed. freshly ironed, crisp, white linen


11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling


11:15 Fall asleep in his big, strong arms



A Man's Perfect Day


6:00 Alarm


6:15 Blow job


6:30 Massive, satisfying **** while reading the sports section


7:00 Breakfast-steak and eggs, coffee and toast-all cooked by naked,
buxom wench who bends over a lot


7:30 Limo arrives


7:45 Several beers en route to the airport


9:15 Flight in personal Lear jet


9:30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route)


9:45 Play front nine (2 under par)


11:45 Lunch-steak and lobster, 3 beers and bottle of Dom Peringon


12:15 Blow job


12:30 Play back nine (4 under)


2:15 Limo back to airport (several bourbons)


2:30 Fly to Bahamas


3:30 Late afternoon fishing expedition with all-female crew, all nude
who also bend over a lot


4:30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs)-on light tackle


5:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle Macpherson


6:45 ****, shower and shave


7:00 Watch news-Michael Jackson assassinated


7:30 Dinner-lobster appetizers, Dom Peringon (1953), big juicy
fillet steak followed by ice cream served on a big pair of tits


9:30 Sex with three women, all with lesbian tendencies


11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing beer


11:30 Night-cap blow job


11:45 In bed alone


11:50 A 22-second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog
to leave the room


11:51 Laugh yourself to sleep

[AnthonyF]

HAHAHAHAHAHAH reps. 3 blowjobs plus all the sex...my dìck would be hurtin. lolol

[Nemesis]

LMAOOOOOOOOO

[Ruiner]

THE PERFECT DAY FOR RUINER (done by a friend of mine on OT as a joke)

6:43 sleep interrupted by persons of color attempting to steal Nissan Pathfinder
6:44 burst into garage, mow down persons of color with AK-47
6:54 police arrive, compliments on marksmanship and choice of weapon for home defense
7:30 breakfast in tastefully-decorated dining area
8:00 leave for work
8:10 near fender-bender with landscaping truck
8:11 occupants of truck approach SUV, appear agitated
8:12 deliver fatal headshots to each with Glock pistol, left-handed, while dialing 911 on cell
8:15 Doraville police arrive on scene, more compliments on marksmanship
8:25 Local Homeland Security representatives arrive, awarded "Freedom Fighter" status on the spot.
9:00 arrive at work
9:01 create thread discussing morning's events
12:00 leave for lunch
12:30 Arrive @ Chops w/father, numerous high-ranking GA officials
12:35 Apps, champagne, light banter centering on gun laws
12:40 dark-skinned waiter approaches table clutching package
12:41 waiter falls to the ground in a hail of fire
12:42 high-fives and good-natured arguing about who was first to hit center-mass
12:50 Police arrive on scene, package turns out to be a special recognition plaque from the NRA, but since you "can't be too careful" no charges are filed
1:00 Steaks and assorted side items arrive
2:00 back to work
2:01 more threads on OT
6:00 leave work, head to trendy club
6:25 doorman ushers you to private table
6:30 local pro athlete and entourage are seated next to you
6:31 blackberry post to OT mentioning athlete by name w/cam phone pic
10:00 arrive home, girlfriend has thoughtfully collected brass casings from garage and had them melted into rifle statuette by local artist
10:05 post pics of brass statuette on OT
11:00 bed, still-warm Glock nestled under pillow

[Kelly]

THE PERFECT DAY FOR RUINER (done by a friend of mine on OT as a joke)

6:43 sleep interrupted by persons of color attempting to steal Nissan Pathfinder
6:44 burst into garage, mow down persons of color with AK-47
6:54 police arrive, compliments on marksmanship and choice of weapon for home defense
7:30 breakfast in tastefully-decorated dining area
8:00 leave for work
8:10 near fender-bender with landscaping truck
8:11 occupants of truck approach SUV, appear agitated
8:12 deliver fatal headshots to each with Glock pistol, left-handed, while dialing 911 on cell
8:15 Doraville police arrive on scene, more compliments on marksmanship
8:25 Local Homeland Security representatives arrive, awarded "Freedom Fighter" status on the spot.
9:00 arrive at work
9:01 create thread discussing morning's events
12:00 leave for lunch
12:30 Arrive @ Chops w/father, numerous high-ranking GA officials
12:35 Apps, champagne, light banter centering on gun laws
12:40 dark-skinned waiter approaches table clutching package
12:41 waiter falls to the ground in a hail of fire
12:42 high-fives and good-natured arguing about who was first to hit center-mass
12:50 Police arrive on scene, package turns out to be a special recognition plaque from the NRA, but since you "can't be too careful" no charges are filed
1:00 Steaks and assorted side items arrive
2:00 back to work
2:01 more threads on OT
6:00 leave work, head to trendy club
6:25 doorman ushers you to private table
6:30 local pro athlete and entourage are seated next to you
6:31 blackberry post to OT mentioning athlete by name w/cam phone pic
10:00 arrive home, girlfriend has thoughtfully collected brass casings from garage and had them melted into rifle statuette by local artist
10:05 post pics of brass statuette on OT
11:00 bed, still-warm Glock nestled under pillow

:thinking:
No sex? Are you a girl?

[Ruiner]

:thinking:
No sex? Are you a girl?

I have a fiancee (so the sex is there) and this was something written by a friend of mine who knows that I am a gun freak.

Another friend wrote this:



I met Ruiner's fiancée on a plane, she was nice, she told me about Ruiner's day. For instance, when Ruiner comes home from work.

He parks the truck around the corner and contacts her via FRS radio to let her know that he is at the perimeter.

She then turns on the floodlights and temporarily disarms the electric gate. Ruiner then vaults over a concertina-wire fence surrounding his yard and rolls into position behind a bush. It's not really a bush, it's actually a secure mobile command post complete with ballistic leaves.

Anyway, once he is satisfied that the yard is clear, he rushes forward through an obstacle course made of discarded truck tires to a small post which contains a retina-scanner. Once identified, he is able to access an otherwise hidden keypad into which he enters the day's unique 67 digit passcode to unlock the front door.

He kicks open the front door and throws a flash-bang into the foyer. His girlfriend wisely waits behind a blast-proof door in a closet. Once the smoke clears out the ventilators, they remove their tactical vests and embrace.

Very nice girl.

[Kelly]

:lmfao:

[Killer]

def a guys 4 fav things...

eat, sleep, sex, and ****...


i don't care what you say... that's what it is...

[Kelly]

def a guys 4 fav things...

eat, sleep, sex, and ****...


i don't care what you say... that's what it is...


??? What was that?

[Leisa]

A Woman's Perfect Day



8:15 Wake up to hugs and kisses


8:30 Weigh-in 5 lbs lighter than yesterday


8:45 Breakfast in bed-freshly squeezed orange juice and
croissants;open presents- expensive jewelry chosen by thoughtful partner


9:15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil


10:00 Light work-out at club with sexy, funny personal trainer


10:30 Facial, manicure, makeup application, shampoo, condition, blow wave


12:00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor café


12:45 Catch sight of partner's ex and notice that she has gained 22lbs


1:00 Shopping with friends: unlimited credit


3:00 Nap


4:00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist; card is from secret admirer


4:15 Massage from strong but gentle hunk-says he rarely gets to work
on such a perfect body


5:30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe


7:30 Candlelit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments
received from other diners/ dancers


10:00 Hot shower- alone


10:50 Carried to bed. freshly ironed, crisp, white linen


11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling


11:15 Fall asleep in his big, strong arms



A Man's Perfect Day


6:00 Alarm


6:15 Blow job


6:30 Massive, satisfying **** while reading the sports section


7:00 Breakfast-steak and eggs, coffee and toast-all cooked by naked,
buxom wench who bends over a lot


7:30 Limo arrives


7:45 Several beers en route to the airport


9:15 Flight in personal Lear jet


9:30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route)


9:45 Play front nine (2 under par)


11:45 Lunch-steak and lobster, 3 beers and bottle of Dom Peringon


12:15 Blow job


12:30 Play back nine (4 under)


2:15 Limo back to airport (several bourbons)


2:30 Fly to Bahamas


3:30 Late afternoon fishing expedition with all-female crew, all nude
who also bend over a lot


4:30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs)-on light tackle


5:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle Macpherson


6:45 ****, shower and shave


7:00 Watch news-Michael Jackson assassinated


7:30 Dinner-lobster appetizers, Dom Peringon (1953), big juicy
fillet steak followed by ice cream served on a big pair of tits


9:30 Sex with three women, all with lesbian tendencies


11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing beer


11:30 Night-cap blow job


11:45 In bed alone


11:50 A 22-second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog
to leave the room


11:51 Laugh yourself to sleep



this is like the biggest bunch of bs. even in my "perfect day" thoughts, half this would never happen, nor would I want it to

[Kelly]

A Woman's Perfect Day



8:15 Wake up to hugs and kisses


8:30 Weigh-in 5 lbs lighter than yesterday


8:45 Breakfast in bed-freshly squeezed orange juice and
croissants;open presents- expensive jewelry chosen by thoughtful partner


9:15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil


10:00 Light work-out at club with sexy, funny personal trainer


10:30 Facial, manicure, makeup application, shampoo, condition, blow wave


12:00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor café


12:45 Catch sight of partner's ex and notice that she has gained 22lbs


1:00 Shopping with friends: unlimited credit


3:00 Nap


4:00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist; card is from secret admirer


4:15 Massage from strong but gentle hunk-says he rarely gets to work
on such a perfect body


5:30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe


7:30 Candlelit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments
received from other diners/ dancers


10:00 Hot shower- alone


10:50 Carried to bed. freshly ironed, crisp, white linen


11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling


11:15 Fall asleep in his big, strong arms



Well Leisa, It would work for me :dunno:

Especially the bolded part :lmfao:

[ThaABomb]

The perfect day for a man is fine except for one thing. A Learjet? Please. G5 or walk.

[IndianStig]

haha sounds about right

[Ciao_Bella]

A Woman's Perfect Day Sucks.... I'd Rather The Man's Perfect Day.

[nreggie454]

A Woman's Perfect Day Sucks.... I'd Rather The Man's Perfect Day.
LOL I didn't even read it!

All I know is, on my perfect day, there is no way I'm waking up before 11 (preferably 12 or 1). A man needs his sleep!

[MistaCee]

HAHAHAHAHAHAH reps. 3 blowjobs plus all the sex...my dìck would be hurtin. lolol


Hell yea same **** I said

[YoTa_BoX]

LOL I didn't even read it!

All I know is, on my perfect day, there is no way I'm waking up before 11 (preferably 12 or 1). A man needs his sleep!


Id wake up at 6am for a Blowjob any day!!!!!

hmmm sleep ....or Blowjob....sleep or Blowjob.......not a hard one there :)

[atl300zx]

Id wake up at 6am for a Blowjob any day!!!!!

hmmm sleep ....or Blowjob....sleep or Blowjob.......not a hard one there :)

Well actually there is a hard one there. :boobies:

[Clegger]

The perfect day for a man is fine except for one thing. A Learjet? Please. G5 or walk.

You also forgot about the maybach ride to the airport, not this limo crap

[HeLLo iM iZzY]

Well actually there is a hard one there. :boobies:Saying that to another man is definitely not cool man :no: