What do you think?

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

About Child Support? Should it be worked out without court orders and no guarantee the person will pay? Should it be settled in court? Should it be garnished from a paycheck?

Give me your input.

[Sol-Badguy]

Taken from paycheck.

That way they never see the money anyway.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

That's kinda what I thought too.

[B16a2 Civic]

Paycheck tiff.
He'll pay a few times, then fall behind...then stop
Get yo money to take care of that baby, its only right

[quickdodge®]

About Child Support? Should it be worked out without court orders and no guarantee the person will pay? Should it be settled in court? Should it be garnished from a paycheck?

Give me your input.

Auto-deducted from check is the best way, by far, to do this. No "I forgot" or "I don't have it" excuses will be heard. The only way you won't get money is if he isn't working. I've been doing mine that way for years and it is the way to do it. Later, QD.

[Killer]

straight from the pay check...

no doubt about it.

[Jaimecbr900]

For you?? Court order all the way.

You have to make sure that if he stops paying you have something that will MAKE him pay. If he pays on time everytime, then a court order means nothing really. Court ordered child support is great when he doesn't. You can then garnish his wages if need be. If he doesn't pay then, he goes to jail. If he files tax returns, you can get his refund.

BTW, you need to call me.....like ASAP....please. :D ;)

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Okay dokay!

Jaime, PM me...

[itsjustdee]

taken from paycheck. that's your only guarantee your child will see the money. you know damn well some guys aren't good for it!

[quickdodge®]

taken from paycheck. that's your only guarantee your child will see the money.

Even paycheck deduction isn't guaranteed. Later, QD.

[cactusEG]

taken from the paycheck..

[candy2082002]

Yeah taken from their paycheck

[Jaimecbr900]

Guys, yall have to remember that paycheck deduction is not an automatic. I'm not 100% sure, but I think you have to have that court ordered. That means there has to be a court case first.

Tiff needs to just serve him and take him to court. Once she has the court ordered amount, he has two choices: pay or don't pay. If he doesn't pay, she has to go back to court and he'll be found in contempt and I believe that is when they'll order it taken out of his check.

I've never dealt with it first hand, so someone correct me if I'm wrong please.

[hydroshutter]

For wages to be garnished, a court order is usually the determining factor.

[Deaf Pimp]

I think Yousef should adopt the baby and provide you the care and nourishment it needs...

On a serious note, you need to get a court order at least. There are no gaurantees these days with Dad's saying they "will pay".

[quickdodge®]

I've never dealt with it first hand, so someone correct me if I'm wrong please.

Ok. Lolol.


Guys, yall have to remember that paycheck deduction is not an automatic. I'm not 100% sure, but I think you have to have that court ordered. That means there has to be a court case first.

Here is a PM that I sent to Tiff:

"For this, you do not have to have a court order. You and the Father will both have to go here(appointment) and decide on a child support amount. If you both agree on an amount, this state office will create an order of child support which will be upheld as a court order. So you won't have to go to court. If you both can not agree on an amount, the office will then send it to actual court where it will be determined for you. Most of the time, in your favor. Then that court order will be used in the office."

Later, QD.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Thanks guys... I'm going to do everything possible to make him pay. *I don't need his money, but Max does. Every penny we get will go in an account for Max that he will have access to when he graduates high school.*

[KAKid240]

From the pay check!! Never trust anyone to pay you. The world just doesn't roll that way...

[Jaimecbr900]

Ok. Lolol.



Here is a PM that I sent to Tiff:

"For this, you do not have to have a court order. You and the Father will both have to go here(appointment) and decide on a child support amount. If you both agree on an amount, this state office will create an order of child support which will be upheld as a court order. So you won't have to go to court. If you both can not agree on an amount, the office will then send it to actual court where it will be determined for you. Most of the time, in your favor. Then that court order will be used in the office."

Later, QD.

I see. So if it's amicable, it can just be made into a court order and then recovered? Word. That actually makes sense. Why waste court time if they agree.

Too bad that in TIFF'S case I'm willing to put money on the fact that it WON'T be amicable, so poor Tiff is going to have to take the long route and take his butt to court. Wanna bet???? :D

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

I see. So if it's amicable, it can just be made into a court order and then recovered? Word. That actually makes sense. Why waste court time if they agree.

Too bad that in TIFF'S case I'm willing to put money on the fact that it WON'T be amicable, so poor Tiff is going to have to take the long route and take his butt to court. Wanna bet???? :D

You are so right! He wouldn't agree to 22% of Max's monthly expenses which totals about $250/month.

[Leisa]

Court ordered....

[Extrememustang]

Ok from personal exp. Let the court do it. I think they take what that person makes in one day or a avg and thats what you get paid a week. NOW IF that person loses their job and lets say goes like 4 months or so without paying, child support enforcement will put a warrant out for their arrest. I was out of a job for awhile and then I got a job but the warrant was still there for the BACK child support, even though I was paying again it didnt matter becasue I got behind. So I had to pay 2k to get it caught up, which I did and was out within 24hrs. Im still a little behind so I pay $100 a week instead of $76. Now if he gets a better paying job you have to goto court to get the amount higher. Hoped this helped. Are you thinking of splitting with Clay?

[quickdodge®]

You are so right! He wouldn't agree to 22% of Max's monthly expenses which totals about $250/month.

He won't have a choice. The court will give you that money. That's exactly how much I pay/month. The court favors the Mother more, especially in newborn cases. Also remember, that as of January 1st, child support amount is figured out by what you both make. Not just the Father as it used to be. Later, QD.

[Jaimecbr900]

You are so right! He wouldn't agree to 22% of Max's monthly expenses which totals about $250/month.

I figured that was going to be the case.

Like I told you, the father is not just the one that sticks it in, it's the one that sticks it out. ;)

BTW, don't go for 22% of Max's expenses.....go for 22% of his INCOME. I'm sure that's a hellva lot more than $250/mo, right? Well, if he hasn't figured out that fathers get the short end of the stick IF they go to court.....he will soon enough. He's a fool for not taking the $250/mo offer. I would've kissed your feet and paid you the money gladly. He's a fool in many ways. ;)

[quickdodge®]

Let me break that down for a second:


Let the court do it.

If she takes it to Child Support Recovery, they will create a "court order" without going to court. It will be the same thing.


I think they take what that person makes in one day or a avg and thats what you get paid a week.

It is now and always has been 19-23% of weekly income. But it looks at both parents income and not just the Father(non-custodial).


NOW IF that person loses their job and lets say goes like 4 months or so without paying, child support enforcement will put a warrant out for their arrest.

It's not a time limit thing. It's over $3,000 you get the warrant.


Now if he gets a better paying job you have to goto court to get the amount higher.

That's not necessarily true. You can only go to court to get more money every 3 years. Later, QD.

[quickdodge®]

BTW, don't go for 22% of Max's expenses.....go for 22% of his INCOME. I'm sure that's a hellva lot more than $250/mo, right?

They don't go by expenses. They take that money out even before they take out taxes. Later, QD.

[tony]

Well, if he hasn't figured out that fathers get the short end of the stick IF they go to court.....he will soon enough. He's a fool for not taking the $250/mo offer. I would've kissed your feet and paid you the money gladly. He's a fool in many ways. ;)

Oh this is so true, I wouldn't even feel right paying only $250 a month.. hell daycare alone is like $450 a month. He was dumb for passing that up..

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Ok from personal exp. Let the court do it. I think they take what that person makes in one day or a avg and thats what you get paid a week. NOW IF that person loses their job and lets say goes like 4 months or so without paying, child support enforcement will put a warrant out for their arrest. I was out of a job for awhile and then I got a job but the warrant was still there for the BACK child support, even though I was paying again it didnt matter becasue I got behind. So I had to pay 2k to get it caught up, which I did and was out within 24hrs. Im still a little behind so I pay $100 a week instead of $76. Now if he gets a better paying job you have to goto court to get the amount higher. Hoped this helped. Are you thinking of splitting with Clay?

We split 3 weeks ago and he's hooked up with someone new.. You might know her, she works with him at G'ville motorsports, her name is Elizabeth.

[CopyRight]

ehhh...it can really go to your advantage or not with court orders, but I don't know the guy, so....

example, my cousin and his gf had a kid together and then they ran into problems and couldn't work things out...so they split...well, it was never really said or talked about, but my cousin would give her $400 every month, as well as spend $200 on groceries a month (diapers, formula, baby clothes, toys, etc...) so he was spending $600 out of pocket every month and he also got the child about half the time...well, I guess she talked to some of her dumbass friends and they told her to take his ass to court...well, the judge wanted a copy of his tax return last year, where he only claimed $18,180, and now the judge put him at $106 a month because the custody is 50/50...so she basically screwed herself, and being that she was living the "paris hilton" lifestyle with that $400a month and not worrying about groceries and such, she's wanting to sue and everything, when she did this all to herself.

so I'd sit down and see if you can be civil and figure child support equally...key term is EQUALLY.....because if he has a job where it's based on tips, he can totally screw you over.....just some food for thought...

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Daycare is $640/month and that's with 1 day free per week and no weekends...

He's an idiot all around.

[CopyRight]

Daycare is $640/month and that's with 1 day free per week and no weekends...

He's an idiot all around.



good lord! I guess I am glad I am in columbus! my sister gets a great deal and the daycare you actually have to put in an application months prior for them accepting the kids only charges like $106 a week, and it's actually really nice with great staff!

on a side note....you hook up with me, you can get next to nothing daycare on ft benning ;)

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

ehhh...it can really go to your advantage or not with court orders, but I don't know the guy, so....

example, my cousin and his gf had a kid together and then they ran into problems and couldn't work things out...so they split...well, it was never really said or talked about, but my cousin would give her $400 every month, as well as spend $200 on groceries a month (diapers, formula, baby clothes, toys, etc...) so he was spending $600 out of pocket every month and he also got the child about half the time...well, I guess she talked to some of her dumbass friends and they told her to take his ass to court...well, the judge wanted a copy of his tax return last year, where he only claimed $18,180, and now the judge put him at $106 a month because the custody is 50/50...so she basically screwed herself, and being that she was living the "paris hilton" lifestyle with that $400a month and not worrying about groceries and such, she's wanting to sue and everything, when she did this all to herself.

so I'd sit down and see if you can be civil and figure child support equally...key term is EQUALLY.....because if he has a job where it's based on tips, he can totally screw you over.....just some food for thought...

good point, he doesn't make shit, I made the money... Together we made $70000 and 75% of that was my income... I won't get shit through the courts, but he's gotten off easy his whole life with his parents always bailing him out of everything... Even if it's just $50, it's better than nothing.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

good lord! I guess I am glad I am in columbus! my sister gets a great deal and the daycare you actually have to put in an application months prior for them accepting the kids only charges like $106 a week, and it's actually really nice with great staff!

on a side note....you hook up with me, you can get next to nothing daycare on ft benning ;)

lol.:boobies:

[koukis14]

TALK TO A LAWYER. My girlfriend talked to the child support services office for advise and they fucked her. Is your child currently enrolled in daycare??

[Extrememustang]

Let me break that down for a second:



If she takes it to Child Support Recovery, they will create a "court order" without going to court. It will be the same thing.



It is now and always has been 19-23% of weekly income. But it looks at both parents income and not just the Father(non-custodial).



It's not a time limit thing. It's over $3,000 you get the warrant.



That's not necessarily true. You can only go to court to get more money every 3 years. Later, QD.

I didnt know it was 3k, so thanks. Also yea I heard it was 3 years, which for me it has but I make $5 more an hr now so Im not going,lol. Also you said it looks at both parents, so that means if when I did it back in 04 it would've been cheaper or more if it was like that back then?

[Jaimecbr900]

good point, he doesn't make shit, I made the money... Together we made $70000 and 75% of that was my income... I won't get shit through the courts, but he's gotten off easy his whole life with his parents always bailing him out of everything... Even if it's just $50, it's better than nothing.


Even using your figures, he'd still have to pay MORE than the $250/mo you offered him. STILL a fool even if he's broke. :D

Besides, if he lives at home with mom and dad and has no expenses, he'll pay more than he thinks he will.

Like I said, $250/mo was a hellva bargain. Should've taken it.

BTW, don't put that back up on the table for him Ms. Tiff...... :no:

[quickdodge®]

I didnt know it was 3k, so thanks. Also yea I heard it was 3 years, which for me it has but I make $5 more an hr now so Im not going,lol. Also you said it looks at both parents, so that means if when I did it back in 04 it would've been cheaper or more if it was like that back then?

Yea, my ex wife filed for an increase in support 3 months before I got a $400/week raise. She should have waited. But the "looking at both parents" thing just started this year in January. It isn't retro-active or anything. Later, QD.

[Extrememustang]

good point, he doesn't make shit, I made the money... Together we made $70000 and 75% of that was my income... I won't get shit through the courts, but he's gotten off easy his whole life with his parents always bailing him out of everything... Even if it's just $50, it's better than nothing.
I guess its the principal. I pay $135 a week for my 6m girl. When I was in the army, daycare was like $50 a week, oh how I miss that. I dotn know that girl, I havent been to gvill msports in a few years. Im surprised he left you, I know you very little from when we worked togther and hey here and there but you seemed like a awesome person.

[quickdodge®]

TALK TO A LAWYER. My girlfriend talked to the child support services office for advise and they fucked her. Is your child currently enrolled in daycare??

In their case, a lawyer would probably not be a wise decision. More money than necessary to spend. Lawyers are better in higher profile cases(as in money and shit, not celebs). Believe me. In the case involving a newborn, it's gonna look good in her favor. Later, QD.

[Extrememustang]

So if I went now since its been 3 years, would they look at both parents NOW? If so does that make it cheaper? If it does I wonder if its worth me trying since I make more now. Im sorry I must missread what you said or got lost in translation.

[quickdodge®]

So if I went now since its been 3 years, would they look at both parents NOW? If so does that make it cheaper? If it does I wonder if its worth me trying since I make more now. Im sorry I must missread what you said or got lost in translation.

Yes, the next time you go for review, it will be determined on both incomes. But if you make more, depending on how much more, it could stay the same or go up. I doubt it will come down at all. Later, QD.

[CopyRight]

okay, so then how about you skip the middle man? Goto his parents? Surely they would not help out their grandson? I'm sure they are more responsible than he is, and as you said, they always bail him out of trouble.

Tiff, here's what you need to do. Sit down, and figure out the cost of diapers, formula, bottles, clothes, baby wipes, toys, baby einstein videos, etc...

and break it all down, and email or show it to his parents....at $250 a month, that's a hell of a deal...

so does he not even want to pay child support and does he even want to see his son anymore? or is he just on to the new gf and forgetting his past?

[quickdodge®]

okay, so then how about you skip the middle man? Goto his parents? Surely they would not help out their grandson? I'm sure they are more responsible than he is, and as you said, they always bail him out of trouble.

She needs guaranteed payment, lolol. But good idea.


Tiff, here's what you need to do. Sit down, and figure out the cost of diapers, formula, bottles, clothes, baby wipes, toys, baby einstein videos, etc...

It's really hard to figure out what she will need. There are a few other expenses in there plus some that you don't even know may come about.


so does he not even want to pay child support and does he even want to see his son anymore?

If that's the case, go to court and have his parental rights terminated. Then, by law, he would not allowed to see or talk to the child again. Later, QD.

[CopyRight]

lol.:boobies:


just think...while I'm deployed my income would be tax free, they'd pay for housing costs, seperation pay, and if I die, you'd get 400k! haha


I get so mad when my buddies get married to females in the military and get all this money and they just split it down the line! granted it's totally illegal....this shit has been going on for as long as the army has been around!

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

I guess its the principal. I pay $135 a week for my 6m girl. When I was in the army, daycare was like $50 a week, oh how I miss that. I dotn know that girl, I havent been to gvill msports in a few years. Im surprised he left you, I know you very little from when we worked togther and hey here and there but you seemed like a awesome person.

Thanks. I left him though, he was irresponsible with his money (that's why his bike, 4 runner and house were repoed and he filed bankruptcy) and it put stress on us both. He spent $4000 in 2 weeks on tattoos, his car (that I paid for), and other useless crap. Not one penny was spent on Max. Since I've been pregnant and had Max (11 1/2 months) he's only spent $90 on Max. That's fucked up. Since I've moved, 3 weeks ago (which he didn't even fight for Max to stay), he's seen Max 3 times and called 5. He's a sorry piece of shit and he needs a reality check!

[Extrememustang]

okay, so then how about you skip the middle man? Goto his parents? Surely they would not help out their grandson? I'm sure they are more responsible than he is, and as you said, they always bail him out of trouble.

Tiff, here's what you need to do. Sit down, and figure out the cost of diapers, formula, bottles, clothes, baby wipes, toys, baby einstein videos, etc...

and break it all down, and email or show it to his parents....at $250 a month, that's a hell of a deal...

so does he not even want to pay child support and does he even want to see his son anymore? or is he just on to the new gf and forgetting his past?

I must have missed something, child enforcement that is right behind the wachovia in gainesville, off of ee butler is where she needs to go.I think she still lives in gainesville. Actually wait, I have there number.770-535-5735

[Extrememustang]

just think...while I'm deployed my income would be tax free, they'd pay for housing costs, seperation pay, and if I die, you'd get 400k! haha


I get so mad when my buddies get married to females in the military and get all this money and they just split it down the line! granted it's totally illegal....this shit has been going on for as long as the army has been around!
When I was in it was 500k. I had to pay $16 every 2 weeks for that.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

okay, so then how about you skip the middle man? Goto his parents? Surely they would not help out their grandson? I'm sure they are more responsible than he is, and as you said, they always bail him out of trouble.

Tiff, here's what you need to do. Sit down, and figure out the cost of diapers, formula, bottles, clothes, baby wipes, toys, baby einstein videos, etc...

and break it all down, and email or show it to his parents....at $250 a month, that's a hell of a deal...

so does he not even want to pay child support and does he even want to see his son anymore? or is he just on to the new gf and forgetting his past?

He's moved on and could care less about his son. He says he does, but he's full of shit. He came to see him the other day for 15 minutes and had to leave because he wanted to see his new girl. Whatever though.

I should have left while I was pregnant, but I wanted to try to work things out for my son. I wanted him to grow up in a healthy home. Obviously, that didn't work, so now I know that if Max ever asks where his daddy is, and why he's not around, I can say I tried everything.

[Jaimecbr900]

okay, so then how about you skip the middle man? Goto his parents? Surely they would not help out their grandson? I'm sure they are more responsible than he is, and as you said, they always bail him out of trouble.

Tiff, here's what you need to do. Sit down, and figure out the cost of diapers, formula, bottles, clothes, baby wipes, toys, baby einstein videos, etc...

and break it all down, and email or show it to his parents....at $250 a month, that's a hell of a deal...

so does he not even want to pay child support and does he even want to see his son anymore? or is he just on to the new gf and forgetting his past?


NO NO NO NO!!!

DO NOT put that $250/mo back up on the table AT ALL.

If he was a fool not to take that 1 time offer, he's a fool period.

Whatever the grandparents want to contribute should be gravy on top. If his parents have to pay HIS child support, that says a lot about HIM. HE can be easily forced to pay. If he doesn't pay, he will go to jail. If his parents want to help him stay out of jail, that's one thing, but they have no legal right nor can be forced to pay. Tiff should not go at raising this child alone. She wasn't alone when he was made, right? If he won't step up and act like a father, well then she should MAKE him step up and support her financially while she covers both roles.

I just don't see how a man can walk away from his own son and not be a father to him. If that cost me $250 or $25K/mo, it would be worth every penny to me. There's not enough money in the world worth my son. I just don't get it.

[CopyRight]

When I was in it was 500k. I had to pay $16 every 2 weeks for that.


I'll have to check again, but I'm pretty sure mine is 400k, but I know it costs me 14 bucks

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

just think...while I'm deployed my income would be tax free, they'd pay for housing costs, seperation pay, and if I die, you'd get 400k! haha


I get so mad when my buddies get married to females in the military and get all this money and they just split it down the line! granted it's totally illegal....this shit has been going on for as long as the army has been around!

We'll get married and then fake your death, ya down?:lmfao:

[Extrememustang]

NO NO NO NO!!!

DO NOT put that $250/mo back up on the table AT ALL.

If he was a fool not to take that 1 time offer, he's a fool period.

Whatever the grandparents want to contribute should be gravy on top. If his parents have to pay HIS child support, that says a lot about HIM. HE can be easily forced to pay. If he doesn't pay, he will go to jail. If his parents want to help him stay out of jail, that's one thing, but they have no legal right nor can be forced to pay. Tiff should not go at raising this child alone. She wasn't alone when he was made, right? If he won't step up and act like a father, well then she should MAKE him step up and support her financially while she covers both roles.

I just don't see how a man can walk away from his own son and not be a father to him. If that cost me $250 or $25K/mo, it would be worth every penny to me. There's not enough money in the world worth my son. I just don't get it.

Exactly.....

[quickdodge®]

so now I know that if Max ever asks where his daddy is, and why he's not around, I can say I tried everything.

Whatever you do, do NOT, seriously, bad talk the Father. That WILL come back to haunt you. If the child asks, tell him that you two couldn't get along and don't go into details about it. If you walk around talking shit about Father and he hears you or you tell him shit about Father, that child will remember and that child will say something. Especially if the Father remains in the child's life. He'll ask if you're saying anything and the child won't know and will tell. He can use that against you in court. Later, QD.

[quickdodge®]

I just don't see how a man can walk away from his own son and not be a father to him.

It happened to me when I was 1 year old. My Father left my Mom, got married, came back to divorce my Mom and volunteered to have his rights taken away from him where I was concerned and went and had two more children with his new wife, with whom he stayed with and raised the children to adults. Did I mention that the day he went to dis-own me, was a week after my sister was born? Yep. He dis-owned her as well. Later, QD.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Whatever you do, do NOT, seriously, bad talk the Father. That WILL come back to haunt you. If the child asks, tell him that you two couldn't get along and don't go into details about it. If you walk around talking shit about Father and he hears you or you tell him shit about Father, that child will remember and that child will say something. Especially if the Father remains in the child's life. He'll ask if you're saying anything and the child won't know and will tell. He can use that against you in court. Later, QD.

I would never ever bad talk Clay to Max. I don't care if Clay tried to murder me, I would never do that. It makes it look like it's okay to talk bad about other people and I certainly don't want Max to do that, nor do I want him thinking he wasn't wanted. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

[CopyRight]

NO NO NO NO!!!

DO NOT put that $250/mo back up on the table AT ALL.

If he was a fool not to take that 1 time offer, he's a fool period.

Whatever the grandparents want to contribute should be gravy on top. If his parents have to pay HIS child support, that says a lot about HIM. HE can be easily forced to pay. If he doesn't pay, he will go to jail. If his parents want to help him stay out of jail, that's one thing, but they have no legal right nor can be forced to pay. Tiff should not go at raising this child alone. She wasn't alone when he was made, right? If he won't step up and act like a father, well then she should MAKE him step up and support her financially while she covers both roles.

I just don't see how a man can walk away from his own son and not be a father to him. If that cost me $250 or $25K/mo, it would be worth every penny to me. There's not enough money in the world worth my son. I just don't get it.

my bad, I thought she was just dead set on $250 from him...

my question now is, if he's filed bankruptcy and has repo's...wont that effect the overall child support if court ordered?

and I was simply saying the grandparents pay the child support, because it didnt sound like this fella made enough to even cover child support...

the way I see it, get a set amount that makes both parties happy, wether it be grandparents or him paying it, make a binding contract and have it notarized and lawyers present when both parties are signing...

oh yeah, I forgot about health care costs and possible emergencies! so at $250 a month that was first offered, that was a fucking steal...so he's a dumbass alright, but in the same token it helped Tiff, because she would've been getting screwed as well with that $250

[CopyRight]

We'll get married and then fake your death, ya down?:lmfao:



I guess so, but I'm gonna have to get in writing that I get booty twice a day, and Max will no longer be Max...he will be named Zeus. haha

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

It happened to me when I was 1 year old. My Father left my Mom, got married, came back to divorce my Mom and volunteered to have his rights taken away from him where I was concerned and went and had two more children with his new wife, with whom he stayed with and raised the children to adults. Did I mention that the day he went to dis-own me, was a week after my sister was born? Yep. He dis-owned her as well. Later, QD.

Sorry bastard. I'm sorry about that Mike, I had no idea.

Jaime, I totally agree... I could never leave Max, not for all the money in the world. He is my angel, my little doodlebug! :yes:

[Extrememustang]

I try to see my son when I can, of course his mom doesnt make it easy. Like I was supposed to get him last weekend and I called her and they were camping. SHe wont even give me her addy, she drops him off at her moms and thats where I get him. She also wont tell my parents where she lives. She is always worried me or my parents or going to kidnap him or some parnoid crap. No one has ever given her a reason to be that way. Maybe when he turns 13 he can live with me becasue I know thats what he wants. He just turned 8.

[Jaimecbr900]

Whatever you do, do NOT, seriously, bad talk the Father. That WILL come back to haunt you. If the child asks, tell him that you two couldn't get along and don't go into details about it. If you walk around talking shit about Father and he hears you or you tell him shit about Father, that child will remember and that child will say something. Especially if the Father remains in the child's life. He'll ask if you're saying anything and the child won't know and will tell. He can use that against you in court. Later, QD.

Not only in court, but the child will be resentful too.

Remember, when we were young, our parents were larger than life. They could do no wrong in our eyes. They were the best. Later on in life you either confirm that or get a wake up call.

If he is terrible father, Max will eventually figure that out on his own. It is NOT Tiff's place to help him make that decision. She doesn't have to lie because more than likely his actions will speak volumes all by themselves.

The truly sad part is that once a child thinks you're a piece of crap.....you're a piece of crap pretty much forever. They hold that in for a long long time. I personally couldn't bear the thought of any of my children thinking bad of me. That would kill me on the spot. I don't see how some people can live with that.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

my bad, I thought she was just dead set on $250 from him...

my question now is, if he's filed bankruptcy and has repo's...wont that effect the overall child support if court ordered?

and I was simply saying the grandparents pay the child support, because it didnt sound like this fella made enough to even cover child support...

the way I see it, get a set amount that makes both parties happy, wether it be grandparents or him paying it, make a binding contract and have it notarized and lawyers present when both parties are signing...

oh yeah, I forgot about health care costs and possible emergencies! so at $250 a month that was first offered, that was a fucking steal...so he's a dumbass alright, but in the same token it helped Tiff, because she would've been getting screwed as well with that $250

Yes, healthcare cost and possible emergencies... His insurance deductible is $2000 if he needs surgery, etc.

HIs parents have offered to pay for the court costs to get child support from him. His mother is sick about all of this and thinks that he needs to step up his game (but what mother wouldn't?)


I guess so, but I'm gonna have to get in writing that I get booty twice a day, and Max will no longer be Max...he will be named Zeus. haha

LOL, His name is actually Maximus - it's already strong enough, no need to change it to Zeus!

[quickdodge®]

SHe wont even give me her addy, she drops him off at her moms and thats where I get him. She also wont tell my parents where she lives..

That's illegal. All I need to say. Is your CS through court? Later, QD.

[CopyRight]

LOL, His name is actually Maximus - it's already strong enough, no need to change it to Zeus!


alright, that's fine Maximus will work. I noticed you didn't even argue the other condition! maybe I need to step it up to 3 or 4! hahaha

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

I personally couldn't bear the thought of any of my children thinking bad of me. That would kill me on the spot. I don't see how some people can live with that.

I totally agree.. It makes my day waking up with Max smiling at me, trusting me and depending on me 100% to give him everything he needs. He could be crying and screaming with a babysitter and when I walk in and say, "hello Max," he stops crying and smiles immediately! That makes me happier than anything else in the whole world.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

alright, that's fine Maximus will work. I noticed you didn't even argue the other condition! maybe I need to step it up to 3 or 4! hahaha

or 5 or 6. lol:idb: I'm fixed, why not!? haha:lmfao:

[Extrememustang]

That's illegal. All I need to say. Is your CS through court? Later, QD.
Yep!

[Jaimecbr900]

It happened to me when I was 1 year old. My Father left my Mom, got married, came back to divorce my Mom and volunteered to have his rights taken away from him where I was concerned and went and had two more children with his new wife, with whom he stayed with and raised the children to adults. Did I mention that the day he went to dis-own me, was a week after my sister was born? Yep. He dis-owned her as well. Later, QD.

Sorry QD, but that glob of meat and bones is NOT a FATHER.

A father does not abandon their children PERIOD. I don't get it. I will NEVER get it.

It's hard for people that have no children of their own to understand what it's like when your son or daughter hugs you unconditionally. It's hard to imagine NOT teaching my son or daughter new things and watching that preverbial light bulb go off above their heads. It's impossible for me to fathom how someone can give up the chance to have your heart pound and your eyes tear up when your son or daughter does well in something. I can not understand how a man can bear to get out of bed KNOWING that he made his own son or daughter's life MORE difficult than it has to be.

Sorry QD, but that guy that abandoned you is no FATHER at all. You are a much better man for it, although I'm sorry that you had to go about it the wrong way. I know what you're gonna say, but I'm gonna give you props anyway..... :goodjob:

[quickdodge®]

Yep!

Call the court or who you have child support through. She is NOT ALLOWED to do that. You are completely within your right to know where your child is at and the residence your child claims. That's crap and illegal. You can get her good. Later, QD.

[quickdodge®]

Sorry QD, but that glob of meat and bones is NOT a FATHER.

A father does not abandon their children PERIOD. I don't get it. I will NEVER get it.

It's hard for people that have no children of their own to understand what it's like when your son or daughter hugs you unconditionally. It's hard to imagine NOT teaching my son or daughter new things and watching that preverbial light bulb go off above their heads. It's impossible for me to fathom how someone can give up the chance to have your heart pound and your eyes tear up when your son or daughter does well in something. I can not understand how a man can bear to get out of bed KNOWING that he made his own son or daughter's life MORE difficult than it has to be.

Sorry QD, but that guy that abandoned you is no FATHER at all. You are a much better man for it, although I'm sorry that you had to go about it the wrong way. I know what you're gonna say, but I'm gonna give you props anyway..... :goodjob:

Wrong choice of words, Jaime. I think exactly the way you do. Here is the technical term for this:

Any man can be a Father.....it takes a real man to be a Dad.

He was my Father. He just wasn't my Dad. I have never even seen a picture of him. Couldn't tell you anything about what he looked like or sounded like or anything. I never cared. I never asked. It was no big deal. My grandparents and Mom raised us and we're ok for it. Later, QD.

[B18c1Turboed]

Ill tell u this, i took my baby mama to court for rights for my daughter, i was willing to pay child support so no biggie,
Well they where taking them from my check, when i quit my job they couldnt do it anymore so i was mailing them a check every month instead.Later on we got back toghter and i started just paying her,but when we broke up she wanted me going thru the courts again.Needless to say they said we cant do it becasue she allowed me to stop.

So moral of STORY get them thru his check and never allow it too stop!!

[quickdodge®]

Ill tell u this, i took my baby mama to court for rights for my daughter, i was willing to pay child support so no biggie,
Well they where taking them from my check, when i quit my job they couldnt do it anymore so i was mailing them a check every month instead.Later on we got back toghter and i started just paying her,but when we broke up she wanted me going thru the courts again.Needless to say they said we cant do it becasue she allowed me to stop

Wow. B18c1Turboed, try going through another child support office. Mine isn't through DHR. It is through an agency called Child Support Recovery. If you want to do that. Later, QD.

[B18c1Turboed]

Wow. B18c1Turboed, try going through another child support office. Mine isn't through DHR. It is through an agency called Child Support Recovery. If you want to do that. Later, QD.

Hell no!!! Ill just pay it monthly, i never get behind so shes fine with me paying her, i do keep a copy of all checks i write her and i make her sign a letter every year stating im not behind at all. Shit u never know, i rather be safe then sorry!

[quickdodge®]

i rather be safe then sorry!

Very ture. That's why CSR does mine for me. Plus, it shows the deduction on my paycheck stub so I have proof that it's coming out. Later, QD.

[Extrememustang]

Ill tell u this, i took my baby mama to court for rights for my daughter, i was willing to pay child support so no biggie,
Well they where taking them from my check, when i quit my job they couldnt do it anymore so i was mailing them a check every month instead.Later on we got back toghter and i started just paying her,but when we broke up she wanted me going thru the courts again.Needless to say they said we cant do it becasue she allowed me to stop.

So moral of STORY get them thru his check and never allow it too stop!!
So wait,why were you paying her if you 2 got back together? She should have called them and told them that u 2 were back togther. Also if your going thru a palce and you pay her directly to them its like you havent paid. Holy crap Im over 1000 posts now.

[B18c1Turboed]

So wait,why were you paying her if you 2 got back together? She should have called them and told them that u 2 were back togther. Also if your going thru a palce and you pay her directly to them its like you havent paid. Holy crap Im over 1000 posts now.

Yup we where toghter ,but i still paid her.It helped with daycare and stuff so no biggie. But no when she told the court i was paying her directly now she signed a form realising me from going thru the courts, she was stupid!!!!

[Extrememustang]

[QUOTE=B18c1Turboed]Yup we where toghter ,but i still paid her.It helped with daycare and stuff so no biggie. But no when she told the court i was paying her directly now she signed a form realising me from going thru the courts, she was stupid!!!![/I guess she thought u guys were gonna stay together and then u didnt

[BTLFED]

About Child Support? Should it be worked out without court orders and no guarantee the person will pay? Should it be settled in court? Should it be garnished from a paycheck?

Give me your input.

I'm not reading all this, but It should DEFINITELY be settled in court, and possibly garnished from a paycheck.

[quickdodge®]

I'm not reading all this, but It should DEFINITELY be settled in court, and possibly garnished from a paycheck.

You should have read, young one. Lolol. Later, QD.

[BTLFED]

You should have read, young one. Lolol. Later, QD.

Why? I have an idea what brought this on, and it is my opinion.

[Extrememustang]

Wrong choice of words, Jaime. I think exactly the way you do. Here is the technical term for this:

Any man can be a Father.....it takes a real man to be a Dad.

He was my Father. He just wasn't my Dad. I have never even seen a picture of him. Couldn't tell you anything about what he looked like or sounded like or anything. I never cared. I never asked. It was no big deal. My grandparents and Mom raised us and we're ok for it. Later, QD.
Like the nirvana song.One of Kurt cobains lyrics is this. "All I had was a father but I really wanted a dad".

[Extrememustang]

Well called the ex wife and she is freaking out cause I want her addy. I told her it isnt right for her to keep that from me. I dont want to goto her house, we always meet halfway

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

I will be going to court. I have every phone call recorded including him saying, "Max is no use to me now."

I also have pictures of him and his new girl all up on each other with dates, proving that they were at least kissing while we were still together.

[CopyRight]

I will be going to court. I have every phone call recorded including him saying, "Max is no use to me now."



Tiff, that is illegal...you cannot use recorded conversations as evidence unless the other party agreed to it or will be willing to allow you to use that as evidence.

It's actually a criminal offense. Because if he has an attorney they can say you setup the call to go the way you wanted it too....ie, called before and ended the conversation horribly and then calling again when he was mad, taping only parts you wanted....

I just wanted to throw that out there, because I dont want you to get into any trouble...

the pics and stuff are fine.... but make sure the pics have somekind of date or a way you can prove when they were taken, and also you are gonna need documentation or some form of proof that you were still together when he kissed this other girl

not trying to be a downer, just trying to help

[CopyRight]

personally, what I would do is...

tell the judge, that you have had numerous phone conversations with the father and him stating that "max was of no use to him" or some other negative statement cutting ties with max and his father

and just list the date and time it occurred...also, if he ever said it to you in a face to face conversation....

[quickdodge®]

Tiff, that is illegal...you cannot use recorded conversations as evidence unless the other party agreed to it or will be willing to allow you to use that as evidence.

It's actually a criminal offense. Because if he has an attorney they can say you setup the call to go the way you wanted it too....ie, called before and ended the conversation horribly and then calling again when he was mad, taping only parts you wanted....

I just wanted to throw that out there, because I dont want you to get into any trouble...

the pics and stuff are fine.... but make sure the pics have somekind of date or a way you can prove when they were taken, and also you are gonna need documentation or some form of proof that you were still together when he kissed this other girl

not trying to be a downer, just trying to help

All this is very true. I never even thought of that. DO NOT use that audio recording. DO NOT even mention that. That's a serious offense. That's why whenever you call a 1-800 company and someone is about to answer, they specifically tell you that you are being recorded for (whatever) reason.

The pics will be kind of hard to prove anything. Even with dates. With Photoshop out there, anyone can put a date on them. Be careful with these ideas.

Good call CopyRight. 18 points for you. Sorry, Tiff. Later, QD.

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Tiff, that is illegal...you cannot use recorded conversations as evidence unless the other party agreed to it or will be willing to allow you to use that as evidence.

It's actually a criminal offense. Because if he has an attorney they can say you setup the call to go the way you wanted it too....ie, called before and ended the conversation horribly and then calling again when he was mad, taping only parts you wanted....

I just wanted to throw that out there, because I dont want you to get into any trouble...

the pics and stuff are fine.... but make sure the pics have somekind of date or a way you can prove when they were taken, and also you are gonna need documentation or some form of proof that you were still together when he kissed this other girl

not trying to be a downer, just trying to help

I know it is illegal unless both parties are aware of the recording, but get this... I stated that in every recorded call, and he agreed that he knew it was recorded and yet he still said Max is no use.

Don't worry, I'm a smart cookie, I'm not going to hang myself and risk losing my son over some deadbeat POS.

[Jaimecbr900]

Tiff, if you're only looking to get child support, there's no need for all the other evidence. Regardless of how big an ass he is, child support is child support. The amount is going to be dependent on his income not his attitude.

Don't worry too much about that stuff. What you should do is just go ahead and file and have it waiting for him to get served as soon as he gets back from vacation. :goodjob:

[Tiff-O-Bitties]

Tiff, if you're only looking to get child support, there's no need for all the other evidence. Regardless of how big an ass he is, child support is child support. The amount is going to be dependent on his income not his attitude.

Don't worry too much about that stuff. What you should do is just go ahead and file and have it waiting for him to get served as soon as he gets back from vacation. :goodjob:

You're right.

[quickdodge®]

Tiff, if you're only looking to get child support, there's no need for all the other evidence. Regardless of how big an ass he is, child support is child support. The amount is going to be dependent on his income not his attitude.

Don't worry too much about that stuff. What you should do is just go ahead and file and have it waiting for him to get served as soon as he gets back from vacation. :goodjob:

Well, now that I think about it, in a way, it may help. You know the judge has a percent range to choose from when deciding child support amount. 19-24%, I believe. If he sees the attitude of the Father, he may fuck him up and let him on the high side. Not sure if it will work or not, but just a thought on that. Later, QD.