Baby's Momma Drama

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Ok quick synopsis...

I have been seeing this guy for going on to 6months now. Has a son that I love dearly and lives here in GA the mom lives in NY. The mom gave full custody to the father (not legally) so the dad moved to GA. Mom rarely calls...Well never. The dad received a phone call last night letting him know that the mom is coming to GA for a week and arrives in Atlanta at 8am tomorrow.

WTF!?!?!?!? I have never met her and have never had to deal with this...It irritates the hell outta me that she is going to come into town when she wants to and completely fuck up any plans that I have made with the dad. She claims that she is just coming to visit the son, but why now after he has been here since June of last year? And why after she called the dad on Sunday to ask if there was a chance that they could get back together and he said no?

Best part- They will be sleeping in the same room at his parents house...He is supposed to sleep in his brothers bed while she sleeps with their son in his bed...They are so gonna fuck... I hate feeling insecure and shit but I have all these fucked up emotions going thru me...AAAAAaaaghhhhh!!!

Advice please??

[william_jeff]

tell him what you feel. tell him you won't tolerate her staying there, tell him to tell her to get a room

[Hektik]

if shes the mother of the child you have no place saying wether she can or cant see the kid.... if youre insecure about the situation then maybe there is something more important that u need to worry about... like why would you e insecure if u knew he trully cared about you... look at it this way this will either break you guys or bring yall closer... let the events take place sit back and see what happens if he fucks her than why waste your time with him.. if he doesnt than maybe you can lay your insecuriies to rest....

[SLOWLYbtngU]

tell him what you feel. tell him you won't tolerate her staying there, tell him to tell her to get a room
She cant afford it...And his family wouldnt let her do that. They are wayyyyyyy too caring. They just found out that the reason he left NY was b/c she cheated. When I say just...I mean like this morning at 10. She comes tomorrow at 8am.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

if shes the mother of the child you have no place saying wether she can or cant see the kid.... if youre insecure about the situation then maybe there is something more important that u need to worry about... like why would you e insecure if u knew he trully cared about you... look at it this way this will either break you guys or bring yall closer... let the events take place sit back and see what happens if he fucks her than why waste your time with him.. if he doesnt than maybe you can lay your insecuriies to rest....
I know where my insecurities lay...We are each other's rebound..But we are taking everything really really really slow....So that we dont end up hurt like we were previously. For the most part I been fine with that, but with her coming..now I worry.

About her being the mom, I totally understand that. I was always upset that she wasnt taking a stand up roll in her son's life...But I at least expected her to give some fair warning not just to me but him and his family.

[william_jeff]

She cant afford it...And his family wouldnt let her do that. They are wayyyyyyy too caring. They just found out that the reason he left NY was b/c she cheated. When I say just...I mean like this morning at 10. She comes tomorrow at 8am.

tell him to stay with you then.

i wouldnt have it point blank, thats some BS.

[Hektik]

realistically she owes you nothing and you owe her nothing....but if hes stupid enough to return to the same person who cheated on him then you dont need him....
prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and wish for something better......

[SLOWLYbtngU]

tell him to stay with you then.

i wouldnt have it point blank, thats some BS.
Well he works at UPS from 11pm to 4am...Has class on Tues and Thurs from 5 until 8pm... During the day they wont be alone b/c his mom stays home...He boxes Mon, Wed, and Fri 5pm to 7pm....

I just dont want them in the same room even though they will be on diff schedules. I just have this feeling I cant get rid of. Like... dunno. I just feel ill.

HE told me not to worry he will probably be at my house every night after I get off work, which is perfectly fine for me...I just didnt think that I would be this insecure for someone that I am not in a commited relationship to. I do have to admit I love how he told me before he told his family and how he caleld me to talk about it to make sure I was ok...But I am not.

[william_jeff]

Well he works at UPS from 11pm to 4am...Has class on Tues and Thurs from 5 until 8pm... During the day they wont be alone b/c his mom stays home...He boxes Mon, Wed, and Fri 5pm to 7pm....

I just dont want them in the same room even though they will be on diff schedules. I just have this feeling I cant get rid of. Like... dunno. I just feel ill.

HE told me not to worry he will probably be at my house every night after I get off work, which is perfectly fine for me...I just didnt think that I would be this insecure for someone that I am not in a commited relationship to. I do have to admit I love how he told me before he told his family and how he caleld me to talk about it to make sure I was ok...But I am not.

call him and tell him how you feel, keeping that shit to yourself will only cause you to go crazy inside. he should take what you feel seriously if not, then..------------->

[SLOWLYbtngU]

realistically she owes you nothing and you owe her nothing....but if hes stupid enough to return to the same person who cheated on him then you dont need him....
prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and wish for something better......

It is gonna be a long week.... Yeah I know ur right. He is tryin to comfort me in knowing that he wont return to her, but I have gotten so close to him and his son. We spend hours on the weekend pillow fighting and going out to do things with his son. I always make sure to include him...

About two weeks ago we went to Augusta and were at a playground when I heard a little girl tell his son to ask his mom for permission. He was so confused at what a "mom" was that he just looked at her and kept going forward...I picked him up and went to another playground and started crying cuz I realized that most people grow up not knowing their dads, this poor 2yr old doesnt know what a "mom" is...:(

[SLOWLYbtngU]

call him and tell him how you feel, keeping that shit to yourself will only cause you to go crazy inside. he should take what you feel seriously if not, then..------------->
That is the thing, he wants to make sure I am ok....I want to make sure he is going to be ok. I dont want him worrying about my insecurities while she is here. She is enough to worry about without me adding my problems.

I assumed I wouldnt see him for a week and he got upset at me. He told me that she is only here for a week, I will be here for him until I decide to leave....I dont plan on it anytime soon. I just wish I wasn't so nauseated(sp?) right now.

[Tasuki_Civic]

call him and tell him how you feel, keeping that shit to yourself will only cause you to go crazy inside. he should take what you feel seriously if not, then..------------->


yea mama...i agree with jeff. let him know wassup. and also what hektik said......sit back and watch to see what happens. this event is all on him not you so it will show if his words are real or not.

Dont loose your cool and be smart and listenin to things he says and does. the truth will show.

[Kelly]

That wouldn't fly right with me either. I'd definietly be sick to my stomach. But I'm also very insecure. It will for sure make or break ya'll. I can't believe his parents are thinking about you.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

yea mama...i agree with jeff. let him know wassup. and also what hektik said......sit back and watch to see what happens. this event is all on him not you so it will show if his words are real or not.

Dont loose your cool and be smart and listenin to things he says and does. the truth will show.

I am tryin to remain calm, ma. Pero tu sabes como somos. Yo I need to keep my mind off of it. I guess that is another reason that I am so torn. I dont think that I am allowed to have say in anything that happens. The baby was before me and so was whatever they felt for each other.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

That wouldn't fly right with me either. I'd definietly be sick to my stomach. But I'm also very insecure. It will for sure make or break ya'll. I can't believe his parents are thinking about you.

Yeah, cant eat...Slept from 4:30-5:15am...And she gets here tomorrow... :(

Blah...Make or break right?

[Kelly]

That's right. Though I've never been in that situation I know that feeling and it's horrible. Can he not stay with you at night?

[PSINXS]

I wouldnt be cool with them in the same room especially if she is pusing they rekindle the flame. He may not want to do that, but the baby mama could be a sexual arson. If he fights temptation, then he sincerely cares about you. I'd let it play out and see what comes of it. Time for him to prove himself.

[gottraction?]

It will be alright. You HAVE to eat and sleep or it will just end up making things worse. If something happen then it wasnt meant to be. I think it will all be ok though

[william_jeff]

I wouldnt be cool with them in the same room especially if she is pusing they rekindle the flame. He may not want to do that, but the baby mama could be a sexual arson. If he fights temptation, then he sincerely cares about you. I'd let it play out and see what comes of it. Time for him to prove himself.

and females are more sexual beast then men real talk. not to mention she could technically get away with rape.

tell him what you feel slowlybtngu, and see what his reaction is. IMO suggest he stay with you since 'she doesnt have money':gay:

[SLOWLYbtngU]

That's right. Though I've never been in that situation I know that feeling and it's horrible. Can he not stay with you at night?
Well he works from 11pm to 4am. So his "night" is when I am at work the next mornng.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

I wouldnt be cool with them in the same room especially if she is pusing they rekindle the flame. He may not want to do that, but the baby mama could be a sexual arson. If he fights temptation, then he sincerely cares about you. I'd let it play out and see what comes of it. Time for him to prove himself.
I know everyone is right, about me just needing to sit back but damn....This shit blows.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

It will be alright. You HAVE to eat and sleep or it will just end up making things worse. If something happen then it wasnt meant to be. I think it will all be ok though
I am trying, it just isnt working right now. I have really bad nerves.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

and females are more sexual beast then men real talk. not to mention she could technically get away with rape.

tell him what you feel slowlybtngu, and see what his reaction is. IMO suggest he stay with you since 'she doesnt have money':gay:
Lol...I would hope that he sticks around for more than my money.

[william_jeff]

Lol...I would hope that he sticks around for more than my money.

hahaha naw im talking about her, since she's broke and cant get a hotel room. IMO thats her excuse to stay.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

That is what I was thinking too....

[william_jeff]

get a knife and go to work...

[SLOWLYbtngU]

I'll pass on the violence. I have never met her and he has never said anything bad about her, even though she cheated.

[PSINXS]

Hey if he does you wrong let me know. I'll go to work on him.

[Lizbiz101]

Don't worry....chill out and do something to get your mind off of it. He's been hurt in past relationships, I'm sure he wouldn't turn around and do the same thing to you, when he knows how it feels to be hurt. It's all in his hands now, so you just got to trust him. Once you saw he had a kid, you should have started to prepare yourself for the mom. Even tho your not the mom, you treat the kid better than she does, she hasn't seen the kid since last June!!! She is worth nothing. Hopefully your boyfriend has already gotten over her in the 6 months he's been with you. Don't worry, just trust him....this well definately make your relationship stronger!!!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Hey if he does you wrong let me know. I'll go to work on him.
Aww babe. It isnt a matter of him doing me wrong...I dont want him to settle for someone that didnt appreciate him the first time around.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Don't worry....chill out and do something to get your mind off of it. He's been hurt in past relationships, I'm sure he wouldn't turn around and do the same thing to you, when he knows how it feels to be hurt. It's all in his hands now, so you just got to trust him. Once you saw he had a kid, you should have started to prepare yourself for the mom. Even tho your not the mom, you treat the kid better than she does, she hasn't seen the kid since last June!!! She is worth nothing. Hopefully your boyfriend has already gotten over her in the 6 months he's been with you. Don't worry, just trust him....this well definately make your relationship stronger!!!
Thank you...I hope he realizes waht you say...and yes.. I am very much so attached to his son. I wish I hadnt allowed it... Especially b/c he isnt mine. :(

[con]

have you offered him to bunk at your place while she's here ;)

sorry Jose, but your statement: "They are so gonna fuck!" cracked me up :lmfao:

Baby Momma Drama FTL.......

Be strong Jose, be strong :cool:

[Lizbiz101]

http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g253/1psykochic/SmileyFace.gifSmile, don't worry, be happy, haha

[PRiMAdonna]

yeah no matter what he says to try and make you feel better, you are still going to be anxious and nervous about the whole ordeal. and nothing is going to help you until she goes back to NY. you are just going to have to wait it out and try and spend as much time with him as you can while she is visiting.

[§treet_§peed]

Damn i would beat a bitches ass if i was you

[Wurm]

three some?

[§treet_§peed]

HAHAHA that's it lol!!!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

have you offered him to bunk at your place while she's here ;)

sorry Jose, but your statement: "They are so gonna fuck!" cracked me up :lmfao:

Baby Momma Drama FTL.......

Be strong Jose, be strong :cool:

Lol... I am dead serious. I am not his girlfriend so he can charge it to the game...I am just the girl he is dating...whatever the hell that means. I am gonna try babe...I am gonna try.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

yeah no matter what he says to try and make you feel better, you are still going to be anxious and nervous about the whole ordeal. and nothing is going to help you until she goes back to NY. you are just going to have to wait it out and try and spend as much time with him as you can while she is visiting.
Yeah, I know...Man it sucks though. I want to fast forward this next week. He says he is gonna be over a lot, which I guess is comforting...But he is such a caring person he wont leave her without a car...I would...In a heart beat!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

three some?
Nah, she isnt my type. Thanks though. I prefer girls with ass..

[1000cckiller]

I don't think she is coming for no reaxon, and he knows that. he told her to come

[Turbo04]

First he should have full LEGAL custody. If she were ever to want to be a bitch about it she could say she let the kid come visit and he took him. 2nd there is no way in hell I would ever consider having an Ex come vist our child and stay in the same place as me, family or no family. I honestly wouldn't give a second thought to telling him to move on if he doesn't understand that this situation is just fucked up and should NOT be happening. You are setting yourself up for some bad shit if he is not going to correct this now. Honestly from what I have read I would be moving on. Hate to be like this but you said it best yourself when you said you were both each others rebounds. I don't think you need this kinda shit...this never shouldve been an issue if you and him were on the same page.

[LiL PaKi]

awwwwwwwwwwwwww..... damn girl this put tears in my eyes just reading about it... you need a hug babe? don't worry.. u just gotta trust him... like someone else said this will make the relationship stronger... man o man what to do?!?! hey!! can u give me his email addy :wink: i'll send him the link to this thread and i'm sure he'll know how u feel then...

[SLOWLYbtngU]

I don't think she is coming for no reaxon, and he knows that. he told her to come
WE have both been wanting her to come visit her son or at least show that she cares....What we didnt think is that she would give less than 48hrs notice....


Update-She is supposed to be here now. He got out of work at 4am and went home and then drove down to Amtrak to pick her up.... :(

[ORGANIZATIONXIII]

thats that fuck shit..

thats all I'm gonna say

you need to just cut that foo off for real.. you need to UPGRADE

[HachiDori]

Hope all goes well with you.

If he wants to be with you and if he says he loves you. He will stay faithfull. If you feel, fuck idk what im saying...

Just hope everything works for you.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

First he should have full LEGAL custody. If she were ever to want to be a bitch about it she could say she let the kid come visit and he took him. 2nd there is no way in hell I would ever consider having an Ex come vist our child and stay in the same place as me, family or no family. I honestly wouldn't give a second thought to telling him to move on if he doesn't understand that this situation is just fucked up and should NOT be happening. You are setting yourself up for some bad shit if he is not going to correct this now. Honestly from what I have read I would be moving on. Hate to be like this but you said it best yourself when you said you were both each others rebounds. I don't think you need this kinda shit...this never shouldve been an issue if you and him were on the same page.

I have asked him multiple times to file for full custody. He doesnt want to put the child through that. I understand but my argument is that it is better to do it now that he is 2 than wait until he is 4-5yrs old and can understand somewhat what is going on. Once again, I dont feel I am entitled to say anything b/c it is their child and I am just "dating" his daddy.

As far as the staying in the same place...I am with you. Not cool. But I can kinda understand the dad not wanting to leave her alone with their son that doesnt even really remember her. He wants to make sure that the baby can transition well with her...or whatever he says...

As far as it not being an issue if we were on the same page...I totally agree. The problem is that when he is ready for a relationship, I am not ready...and when I am ready, he isnt. But honestly after this....I just want to steal him away all week. I feel threatened. big time

[SLOWLYbtngU]

awwwwwwwwwwwwww..... damn girl this put tears in my eyes just reading about it... you need a hug babe? don't worry.. u just gotta trust him... like someone else said this will make the relationship stronger... man o man what to do?!?! hey!! can u give me his email addy :wink: i'll send him the link to this thread and i'm sure he'll know how u feel then...
tears in your eyes...Girl you have no idea. I dont think I have anymore to cry. Everyone is being really great towards me cuz they wanna keep me busy while she is here. I have amazing friends...But at the same time, no matter what I am doing...I will be wondering what THEY are doing.

[ORGANIZATIONXIII]

amazing friends?

foo you ain't called me.... lets go out tonight

[SLOWLYbtngU]

thats that fuck shit..

thats all I'm gonna say

you need to just cut that foo off for real.. you need to UPGRADE
Ant, I know...I know... Everyone tells me to just wait it out. I know that is the only real option that I have...but...Man you know the story...It isnt about just cutting somebody off when they have entered and penetrated your life. He has done nothing wrong...nothing. Sure I stress out about stupid shit, but who doesnt? Truthfully...Is there anything that I have told you so far that would give me just cause to just drop him?

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Hope all goes well with you.

If he wants to be with you and if he says he loves you. He will stay faithfull. If you feel, fuck idk what im saying...

Just hope everything works for you.
Lol...hell I dunno what I am thinking or saying...

Thank u. I can only hope for the best right? ::crosses fingers::

[SLOWLYbtngU]

amazing friends?

foo you ain't called me.... lets go out tonight
I can't... Rocio is coming over to teach a friend how to salsa at 6:30 and Jose is coming over after class. U can come visit me though. :)

[william_jeff]

Nah, she isnt my type. Thanks though. I prefer girls with ass..

i have a candidate:goodjob:

[SLOWLYbtngU]

i have a candidate:goodjob:
I bet you do...

[william_jeff]

so have you talked to him yet?

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Update-

The baby went to hug the mom and said "Joss....wait. Daddy, what's her name?"

For those that dont know..My name is Joselyn. I actually feel bad..But at the same time I am glad she can see that someone is stepping up where she isnt.

[william_jeff]

Update-

The baby went to hug the mom and said "Joss....wait. Daddy, what's her name?"

For those that dont know..My name is Joselyn. I actually feel bad..But at the same time I am glad she can see that someone is stepping up where she isnt.

"do yo thing do yo thing do it, do you thing do yo thing do it"

make her even more jealous joselyn, can i call you jose? make her jealous jose and continue doing what your doing and FTB

[SLOWLYbtngU]

"do yo thing do yo thing do it, do you thing do yo thing do it"

make her even more jealous joselyn, can i call you jose? make her jealous jose and continue doing what your doing and FTB
Hehehe...I respond to Jose...But i think you knew that ;)

Yeah apparently she is a hippy now? Umm yeah. He thinks she is weird. GOOD!!!!!

[ORGANIZATIONXIII]

I may come through...

wassup with my girl Rocio?

[SLOWLYbtngU]

I may come through...

wassup with my girl Rocio?
What you mean? She is straight. She is coming thru to help out a friend that needs to learn how to salsa ASAP...Actually u know this person..I think. He is infamous on IA..lol

No doubt if you do that is straight I am headed home now.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Update- He came by last night. He says that she isnt the same girl he met, she is weird now. HE says that she is "a hippie, that is into the Beatles, and wears white socks with black shoes." I dunno what that means but I hope it means, "I wont insert myself into her."

I havent gotten anything today...no call...no text...I am flippin out...

[tony]

I didnt read the whole thread so I apologize if this has been said already. I have a son myself so I understand the situation, them staying in the same place is UNACCEPTABLE on ANY level. He should never put you in that kind of position if he really cares about you. Me personally I would rather sleep in my car than sleep in the same room with my ex knowing I am in a relationship.

The only connection he needs to have with her is through their child and nothing more. None of this family bs.. I really hate for throw this out there but baby mama = easy sex. I don't care what any man says the temptation is there if he just got out of a relationship with her.

Sit down and have a real talk with him, explain that you respect the situation but your relationship with him needs to be respected as well. Stand your ground and if he cannot accept it.. leave. If its happening this early in the relationship it is not going to get better, trust me.

[SLow_POke]

i myself been thru something similar. the only thing i can add but has been added already talk to your MAN.

i think you should also meet the EX not to figght but to let her know wuz up/
.

[tony]

I have asked him multiple times to file for full custody. He doesnt want to put the child through that. I understand but my argument is that it is better to do it now that he is 2 than wait until he is 4-5yrs old and can understand somewhat what is going on. Once again, I dont feel I am entitled to say anything b/c it is their child and I am just "dating" his daddy.

As far as the staying in the same place...I am with you. Not cool. But I can kinda understand the dad not wanting to leave her alone with their son that doesnt even really remember her. He wants to make sure that the baby can transition well with her...or whatever he says...

As far as it not being an issue if we were on the same page...I totally agree. The problem is that when he is ready for a relationship, I am not ready...and when I am ready, he isnt. But honestly after this....I just want to steal him away all week. I feel threatened. big time

Okay I hate to harp on this but he is making dumb ass excuses. Regardless of her being a good mother or not if she is an adult then she can handle the child.

Him picking her up from Amtrak: Bullshit

Him saying he wants to be there so the baby can transition: Bullshit

Him not calling you: Bullshit

Him not filing for custody: Bullshit

See a pattern here? Sounds like he's full of shit. It would be better to file for custody now when the child doesn't understand than to cause the confusion when she is 5 or 6. I've been in both situations, the child and the parent. He needs to cut communication/interraction with the mother on any level other than the child.

[SLow_POke]

Okay I hate to harp on this but he is making dumb ass excuses. Regardless of her being a good mother or not if she is an adult then she can handle the child.

Him picking her up from Amtrak: Bullshit

Him saying he wants to be there so the baby can transition: Bullshit

Him not calling you: Bullshit

Him not filing for custody: Bullshit

See a pattern here? Sounds like he's full of shit. It would be better to file for custody now when the child doesn't understand than to cause the confusion when she is 5 or 6. I've been in both situations, the child and the parent. He needs to cut communication/interraction with the mother on any level other than the child.


hmm hate to admit it also . but . . . liek i mentioned before i been thru it

and got back togetther with my son's mom.

i knwo its know its not the kind post you might have been looking for but ..

the woman i was living with also made it easy for me to get back with my baby's momma she " let the evetn take its course" just sat back so . . . . . . . .
i took it as she was like what ever

[SLOWLYbtngU]

I didnt read the whole thread so I apologize if this has been said already. I have a son myself so I understand the situation, them staying in the same place is UNACCEPTABLE on ANY level. He should never put you in that kind of position if he really cares about you. Me personally I would rather sleep in my car than sleep in the same room with my ex knowing I am in a relationship.

The only connection he needs to have with her is through their child and nothing more. None of this family bs.. I really hate for throw this out there but baby mama = easy sex. I don't care what any man says the temptation is there if he just got out of a relationship with her.

Sit down and have a real talk with him, explain that you respect the situation but your relationship with him needs to be respected as well. Stand your ground and if he cannot accept it.. leave. If its happening this early in the relationship it is not going to get better, trust me.

Yes I know...The bolded part is why I am soooo uneasy. About sitting down and talking to him, I just dont feel that it is my place...

[SLOWLYbtngU]

i myself been thru something similar. the only thing i can add but has been added already talk to your MAN.

i think you should also meet the EX not to figght but to let her know wuz up/
.
Well see that is what is weird about the whole thing...She wants to meet me...But I have no desire to meet her. He told me that if he invites me to the house he expects me to go...I wont. I dont want to be involved in this. I figure that THEY were in a relationship before me, THEY had a child before me, THEY called it quits before me, and therefore anything that pertains to the past needs to be handled by THEM, not including me.

[tony]

If he has made you a part of his life and his childs life it is definitely your place. Him introducing you to his daughter is a HUGE step in saying he is serious. In the beginning of the relationship you have to let it be known otherwise you are enabling him to do whatever he wants. He's not giving you the respect you deserve and it sounds like you are giving him way too much respect. Not sure why this issue hits me hard but most of the time its hard to find women who are understanding of the situation.. I guess what gets me is you understand and he is taking advantage of that.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Okay I hate to harp on this but he is making dumb ass excuses. Regardless of her being a good mother or not if she is an adult then she can handle the child.

Him picking her up from Amtrak: Bullshit

Him saying he wants to be there so the baby can transition: Bullshit

Him not calling you: Bullshit

Him not filing for custody: Bullshit

See a pattern here? Sounds like he's full of shit. It would be better to file for custody now when the child doesn't understand than to cause the confusion when she is 5 or 6. I've been in both situations, the child and the parent. He needs to cut communication/interraction with the mother on any level other than the child.

Once again... I know. Just like deep down inside I know he still loves her. She cheated on him not him on her so he was the one that got shunned... HE stayed in NY for an additional 2 months trying to make things work between them, but she never came home. Being that he didnt have any family there and only moved there for her, he brought himself and his son back to GA. He came back June of 2006 and this is her first time even trying to visit. I hope and pray that he makes the right decisions these next couple of days. I can only hope. I refuse to be one of those overly dramatic chicks that starts shit with the baby's mom just b/c she was there before me...I see it as she had her shot and messed up. Now is my shot and I hope he doesnt mess up b/c I am not willing to let him go and he is too great for me to even think of messing it up.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

hmm hate to admit it also . but . . . liek i mentioned before i been thru it

and got back togetther with my son's mom.

i knwo its know its not the kind post you might have been looking for but ..

the woman i was living with also made it easy for me to get back with my baby's momma she " let the evetn take its course" just sat back so . . . . . . . .
i took it as she was like what ever
what is too much and what is too little????

[SLOWLYbtngU]

If he has made you a part of his life and his childs life it is definitely your place. Him introducing you to his daughter is a HUGE step in saying he is serious. In the beginning of the relationship you have to let it be known otherwise you are enabling him to do whatever he wants. He's not giving you the respect you deserve and it sounds like you are giving him way too much respect. Not sure why this issue hits me hard but most of the time its hard to find women who are understanding of the situation.. I guess what gets me is you understand and he is taking advantage of that.

See that is the thing, in the beginning, he would make plans with me and sometimes cancel and he never gave me a reason why. We finally sat down one day and I asked him why plans change so much with him. He told me that because he relies so heavily on his family watching his son, sometimes he feels bad asking, so he rather cancel his plans and stay home with him. He said he didnt want to bring him along because he felt like it would be a burden on me. I thought that was crazy, and after that made sure to include his son in any plans that we had, I mean sure we still have our time...But that is his son!!!!

I dont want to think that he is taking advantage because for the most part he did let me know first...He gave me the ability to state my feelings but I held back because I knew that her coming down was burden enough on him I didnt want him worried about me too. He dis call and text and stop by yesterday but today...Not one text. Nothing. I can only hope right?

[tony]

If through all of that he still makes you happy then I guess there is nothing more to say, you seem to really care for him and I do know that things are not always perfect. Maybe after this weekend it will all go away since she lives out of state, the situation just stinks to high hell to me though.

I feel like I'm rambling so I'll just say this, the key to making the situation work for both of you is communication. And that does not mean lightly touching on subjects, tell him everything you feel and think even if it will shake things up. And vice versa, he needs to be blatantly honest with you and not leave any chance for your mind to wander.. as it is doing now. I hope it works out for both of you, everyone deserves to be happy.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

If through all of that he still makes you happy then I guess there is nothing more to say, you seem to really care for him and I do know that things are not always perfect. Maybe after this weekend it will all go away since she lives out of state, the situation just stinks to high hell to me though.

I feel like I'm rambling so I'll just say this, the key to making the situation work for both of you is communication. And that does not mean lightly touching on subjects, tell him everything you feel and think even if it will shake things up. And vice versa, he needs to be blatantly honest with you and not leave any chance for your mind to wander.. as it is doing now. I hope it works out for both of you, everyone deserves to be happy.

I love him and his son more than words can express. We will talk.

[Kelly]

So... How are things going?

[SLOWLYbtngU]

So far so good. He calls more than usual and he updates me on how everything is going. He is sick right now so he is just tryin to get over that. She isnt leaving Thurs. She is leaving Tuesday! Thank God!

[GSRteg®]

Im with him it isnt your place saying wether she can or cant see the son.if youre insecure about the situation then maybe there is something more important that u need to worry about... (maybe your not ready for a relationship like this?) If he cares for you wether he loves you or likes you then youll know when she arrives. Itll show when shes there and how he treats you while shes in the presence. Also dont think negative that there going to fuck bc that right there says alot. Think positive and sit back and watch the show. Also when she called and sked him if they can get back together he said no right. Well be carefull though she might try something(you know how girls are since your one lol no seriously just watch her.) Make her relize what she lost.




if shes the mother of the child you have no place saying wether she can or cant see the kid.... if youre insecure about the situation then maybe there is something more important that u need to worry about... like why would you e insecure if u knew he trully cared about you... look at it this way this will either break you guys or bring yall closer... let the events take place sit back and see what happens if he fucks her than why waste your time with him.. if he doesnt than maybe you can lay your insecuriies to rest....

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Im with him it isnt your place saying wether she can or cant see the son.if youre insecure about the situation then maybe there is something more important that u need to worry about... (maybe your not ready for a relationship like this?) If he cares for you wether he loves you or likes you then youll know when she arrives. Itll show when shes there and how he treats you while shes in the presence. Also dont think negative that there going to fuck bc that right there says alot. Think positive and sit back and watch the show. Also when she called and sked him if they can get back together he said no right. Well be carefull though she might try something(you know how girls are since your one lol no seriously just watch her.) Make her relize what she lost.

That was my exact worry...

What I love is (I know this is bad) but he is really sick so he has been sleeping in a seperate room in hopes of not getting his son or her sick...He just waits on the son to fall asleep then places him in bed with his mom and leaves for work. When he comes home at 4am he just stays in the living room on the couch.

[GSRteg®]

Well see right there that shows alot if he calls you more than often. He's showing that he favors you instead of his ex or whatever she is. Its all going to work out girl just you wait.:yes:


That was my exact worry...

What I love is (I know this is bad) but he is really sick so he has been sleeping in a seperate room in hopes of not getting his son or her sick...He just waits on the son to fall asleep then places him in bed with his mom and leaves for work. When he comes home at 4am he just stays in the living room on the couch.

[twinj]

Good everything went well. I was wondering how everything went.

[JDMJAYDC2]

yeah it seems pretty cool jose dont worry about it if there gonna have sex there is nothing you can do about it but i doubt it would happen seening all the effort he is putting in to make you feel ok during this whole thing. im thinking after all this is over you guys should talk about where you see each other i understand you want to take it slow but if your trying to be friends it doesnt make too much since for you to get all mad over stuff like this thats more relationship type problems but im sure you guys will end up together just be real slow with each other and im sure it will work out. by the way good to see you back on IA dammit!!!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

One more day!!! So far everything is great. He is civilized with her and has yet to say anything bad about her. What he does specify is how different they both are now and the only thing that they really have in common is the love for their son. He is having issues with her parenting but now he is worried about what he can say and cant say b/c he doesnt want her to try to file for full custody.

Thanks to everyone that has given opinions and advice. We are going to talk when she leaves. We already established that. I am glad that it was him and not me that brought it up though. He did mention that he was a little uneasy about me being "ok" with everything. I told him that I wasnt ok and, explained that I just didnt want to be something else to worry about. So yeah...We are good. So far at least. I dont think I will rest easy until she leaves completely...

[william_jeff]

sounds good. im glad you two are going to talk about it finally. it will make for good conversation and if you want for good relationship

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Yeah I know... I am a little hurt right now b/c he told me last night that deep down inside he was hoping that maybe feelings were still there. He said that all he ended up doing was comparing her to me and the way I do things. I just, I dunno...I want to know when he planned on telling me about the want for feelings.

[william_jeff]

you know what i like about this dude, is that he is stand up. im glad he told you what he was feeling deep down inside, that shit means alot and not many people period give the other person the courtesy to know, they just do what they want and dont give a shit about others feelings.

but on the other hand it is messed up that he 'had' her stay at his house. yea, i say 'had her' stay there, because with him saying that makes me think that he kind of insisted on her staying there, because in order to go anywhere(vacation or not) you need money, so how can she come this way with out money, i mean where did the plane/train/bus money come from??? i hate to say all of that but that is where my thoughts are on this matter. i would hate to see you get hurt, but it seems at this point that he would at least have the decency to let you know what he is going to do, so i doubt he is going to 'cheat' on you.

i hope all goes well

[SLOWLYbtngU]

you know what i like about this dude, is that he is stand up. im glad he told you what he was feeling deep down inside, that shit means alot and not many people period give the other person the courtesy to know, they just do what they want and dont give a shit about others feelings.

but on the other hand it is messed up that he 'had' her stay at his house. yea, i say 'had her' stay there, because with him saying that makes me think that he kind of insisted on her staying there, because in order to go anywhere(vacation or not) you need money, so how can she come this way with out money, i mean where did the plane/train/bus money come from??? i hate to say all of that but that is where my thoughts are on this matter. i would hate to see you get hurt, but it seems at this point that he would at least have the decency to let you know what he is going to do, so i doubt he is going to 'cheat' on you.

i hope all goes well

Her mom paid for her bus ticket...We found out that it was her mom that insisted she come. So it wasnt even from her wanting to come. Her mom made her.

I guess ur right...He tells me that there is nothing for me to worry about with them...I am not worried about them anymore... I just want to know what would have happened had there been feelings???

[william_jeff]

Her mom paid for her bus ticket...We found out that it was her mom that insisted she come. So it wasnt even from her wanting to come. Her mom made her.

I guess ur right...He tells me that there is nothing for me to worry about with them...I am not worried about them anymore... I just want to know what would have happened had there been feelings???

wow, what a fucking lame as a mother, and we take advantage and dont even give our mothers the thanks they deserve for actually staying, but when you hear of bums like this clit, it makes you appreciative. she's a hoe haha

thats good you're not worried and since she's gone now, you should be good. but if there were feelings, its almost a guarantee he would have tried to make things work, ive done it, not in this relationship, but in pasts, so, hopefully his feelings are gone now.

:boobies: for you

[SLOWLYbtngU]

lol..thx for the boobies.

[con]

good for you, baby momma is back out of the state...........

[SLOWLYbtngU]

good for you, baby momma is back out of the state...........
Lol. Thx man. We need to get together for a cook out. All of us, the whole crew. It has been too long.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

We were together last night and we talked, but its weird cuz when we are around each other it just feels like there is no one else and nothing matters...So we were seriously talking for like 20 min...And then we just chilled for a bit... She left today :bump:

[william_jeff]

i thought she left yesterday..

is everything straight, is everything aired out between you two?

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Nah, today. We are straight. We are gonna play couples Scene It on Saturday...U and ur fiance should come...It is a hellova drive, but i guarantee it is worth it... Did u see the stupid pics from Walmart? :)

[william_jeff]

LOL yea i saw yall crackheads acting a fool in walmart. you should check your comments, they are a little tame than usual, yet still has a little humor to it.

making a trip to GA right now...ehh, prolly not, well actually i lie, im going to my sisters house this weekend FTW.

[SLOWLYbtngU]

LOL yea i saw yall crackheads acting a fool in walmart. you should check your comments, they are a little tame than usual, yet still has a little humor to it.

making a trip to GA right now...ehh, prolly not, well actually i lie, im going to my sisters house this weekend FTW.

Oh what is with the tameness?? That is lame. I love shit talking with you. I love the chick that got in the cheese case...She beat us all with the pics...That is my fave.

I dont work Fri. When are you driving down?

[william_jeff]

Oh what is with the tameness?? That is lame. I love shit talking with you. I love the chick that got in the cheese case...She beat us all with the pics...That is my fave.

I dont work Fri. When are you driving down?

haha shit talking with you is the best...the boo boo face w/ the EPT test is the greatest..cuz your :boobies: relate to the quote you put under the pic:lmfao:


im headed to savannah saturday i think

[roy]

tell him to tell her to get of your nutt's !!

[con]

Lol. Thx man. We need to get together for a cook out. All of us, the whole crew. It has been too long.

cookout, as in BBQ??? you know blk people luv BBQ... BBQ FTW :goodjob: let's plan that shiat....I suck at planning btw..... :ninja:

[SLOWLYbtngU]

tell him to tell her to get of your nutt's !!
LMAO...Nah I quit with him. Sucks huh? All that damn emotional shit I went through jsut to say fuck him in the end...ah well

[SLOWLYbtngU]

cookout, as in BBQ??? you know blk people luv BBQ... BBQ FTW :goodjob: let's plan that shiat....I suck at planning btw..... :ninja:
Yeah BBQ...

The hard part is finding a weekend that isnt gonna be winter cold...lol Fucking GA

[cactusEG]

LMAO...Nah I quit with him. Sucks huh? All that damn emotional shit I went through jsut to say fuck him in the end...ah well


so whats up with it. over here lol

[con]

Yeah BBQ...

The hard part is finding a weekend that isnt gonna be winter cold...lol Fucking GA

Just pick one, I'm sure the weather will be in your favor!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

so whats up with it. over here lol
Dude, I am a fat chick...nuff said

[SLOWLYbtngU]

Just pick one, I'm sure the weather will be in your favor!
Aight, I gotta call around. I wanna find a park that you can cook out at and is central for everyone...You all always come from the southside, it's time we came to ya'll

[SLow_POke]

invited or not CARNEASADA IM IN!!

[SLOWLYbtngU]

invited or not CARNEASADA IM IN!!
Lmao!! No doubt, I never have a problem with people inviting themselves.

[cactusEG]

Dude, I am a fat chick...nuff said



ohhh who cares... they have a saying for that but i dont remeber does it and does it all go to ur booty??? lol:screwy: :ninja: