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Brett
04-03-2007, 12:46 PM
1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays; I go on Fridays.

2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California, and mine is in Texas.

3. I take my wife everywhere..... but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack, and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!"

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce

11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"

Sol-Badguy
04-03-2007, 12:48 PM
8. She got a mud pack, and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"

Made me LIRL!!

Brett
04-03-2007, 01:00 PM
#13 was my fav.

ShooterMcGavin
04-03-2007, 01:07 PM
haha pretty funny

thinkfast®
04-03-2007, 01:10 PM
WAY TO GO GRAMPS

sirkus
04-03-2007, 01:10 PM
lmao @ 4. +1
I can picture rodney dangerfield saying all of these.

Leisa
04-04-2007, 07:00 AM
#13 was my fav.


Good thing there is not any dust on the tv, huh?

Mike Lowrey
04-04-2007, 07:05 AM
3. I take my wife everywhere..... but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.

13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"

My Favorites FTW!

quickdodge®
04-04-2007, 07:08 AM
#14 was funnier than shit, lolol. Later, QD.

Brett
04-04-2007, 07:39 AM
Shut up Mike :lmfao:

quickdodge®
04-04-2007, 04:44 PM
Lolol. Later, QD.